Crash
by Mandy138
Summary: Two clans will combine. One will be rebuilt and a new will be forged. Time will push and pull and sunder lives and ideals, and they will be stronger for it. Pain was always the best teacher. [KakaSaku]
1. Chapter 1

A work in progress. Consider this a fluke; it is something I rarely do, chapter fics, that is. Of the (now) forty stories I've authored, this will only be the seventh that is chaptered.

* * *

They were still discussing the topic that had sprung from one of their drunken mouths some nights ago. He couldn't remember who it had been but the truth was that it was an interesting topic to think about and he'd been doing so quite a bit since it'd come up. In fact, he was still doing it as he leaned against the wall with crossed arms beside the table of jabbering idiots. His mouth quirked in wry correction; they were only idiots when mixed with alcohol. Well…he held Genma exempt from this. How that man could do some of the things he did when sober…

He slid another look at the table, eyes passing over an obviously smiling and terribly amused Kakashi as he joined in laughing at a stupid act courtesy of another.

Yes. It was an interesting topic for consideration, alright. He would have to speak to Tsunade about that tomorrow.

* * *

"No, really, Tsunade," he began in a tone bordering outright pleading for her to just listen to what he was really getting at. "I think we should have an in-depth discussion about this. Just think," he said, gesturing with a hand as he leaned on a wall again, "such a match would produce a clan enemies would rue to reckon with."

She'd merely looked at him, humoring his latest _idea_ with half-lidded eyes and depleting patience.

"Please." His voice was quiet, serious, and she found her brows drawing together as she contemplated his mood. "Can't you just see it?"

She could. The Hatake chakra and outstanding genius capacity for tactics, intelligence, and combat combined with the Haruno control and impressive intellect in her own right would meet in a most formidable union. Not to mention the Hatake hound blood pact. What a lethal combination that would be. She shivered and he gave a wicked smile.

"I see you do." That damned knowing smile really _was_ wicked.

"I don't know if that's even plausible, Jiraiya," she said with a frown, large eyes reading into his giddy posture. "They're just…so different. There's no telling if they're even 'compatible' in that sense."

"I'll be sure to look further into it, question where it's needed," he said, speaking to her just as much as to himself and nodding. She threw him a caustically skeptic look at his self pep talk. "If he doesn't start _moving_, the remainder of his clan will go the way of the Uchiha. It's not like he's got a lot of time on his hands. And he was little Yondaime's kid, after all, so I gotta do _some_thing ."

"No, he was Sakumo's child." Tsunade let slip a scowl, memories and voice more than a little bitter. "The Yondaime was _not_ Kakashi's father. And why do you feel the need to look after him? He's a grown man."

He threw a gauging look, his features pinched at her palpable resentment. "Someone's got to. He's got no one else. And he was more a father to him than Sakumo was." Another look. "Don't tell me you're going to let _his_ failures get in the way."

She huffed in indignation, looking away to avoid his accusatory eyes before shifting back to the documents before her. "It was his own fault about Kakashi."

"And you intend to hold Kakashi responsible for the actions of an adult when he was not in the know? Would have been powerless to stop it?"

"I don't hold _anything_ against Kakashi. He's a magnificent ninja." There was hurt in her quiet voice, a long-instilled pain, and he could tell from the way her breath hitched that it resided in her breast. Her words were whispers of forbidden thoughts, unchangeable regrets. "…Why couldn't he just be a little older…I just be a little younger?"

His face fell into something between pity and sympathy. So her infatuation with Sakumo had carried over to the son, as well. The corner of his lips quirked downwards; nevertheless, the status of her true feelings on the matter was a situation that couldn't be changed.

"So is that what this has all been about? Is that why this isn't 'plausible', because it's not with you? Is that why you've kept him on near constant active mission status for all this time? To have excuses to interact with him? To keep him unavailable?"

His look was cool and assessing and indifferent, although he didn't feel nearly all that as he should have. And he didn't know what to think – to be glad or not – that she'd met it with such a scalding one of her own. Her reply was just as heated.

"Of course not!" Those eyes were crowned by deeply angled brows. "As if I would be so unprofessional as to let personal feelings get involved with work!" A weighted pause. "Not that there's any there…in _that_ regard. Besides, the age difference between he and I is as comparable as between him and her. I think it would be some kind of burden, eventually, in some way. Different brackets have different concerns, behavior…wants. Knowing him, he'd be too aware and calculating of how it could be affecting her."

She glanced away in a manner slightly comic, breaking the tension somewhat. "Honestly, can't you think of any situation _beyond_ possible sexual undertones?"

"There's hardly anything 'possible' about it," he mumbled grumpily, jumping on her response.

"JIRAIYA!"

"Sorry. Sorry."

She knew where his heart lay. He'd had quite the soft spot for the boy and student who'd become the yondaime. And because of his unique connection to that student, Kakashi had inherited that affection to a great degree. Yondaime had been so proud and nurturing of the young Hatake, and over the years as he really got to know him, he could see why.

"It'd be a shame to lose that kind of power," he mused.

She knew what he meant.

Nodding, she chose to voice her agreement. It was only natural and expected of the hokage to acquiesce the importance of blood best kept _within_ one's village. "I know."

Returning to her work, she gave all the pretenses of completely brushing the former teammate off to complete her revising of documents. "Play your game, have your fun, but please don't damage them beyond salvation."

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

It was a typical day at the hospital…only it wasn't. She couldn't understand where the hell all these freak cases were coming from. Honestly! What were some of these people doing? Had _any_ of them been in their right minds? Although, granted, none had been that serious an injury; it was just one of those 'what the hell' days. She wiped the back of a hand across her forehead, swiping aside hair and frustration and releasing a good chunk of stress through a sigh. Not to fear, it was already mid afternoon, only a few more hours to suffer through.

They were hours that flew by.

She happily bid Shizune and others good night and whisked out the exit, breathing in the cooling evening air reverently. She let it out in a very audible manner, a gasp more than a sigh, and smiled in maddening release, hugging text books tightly to her chest. Boy, was she glad to be _off_! Time for _food_! Precious, precious food!

"Hey, little girl," the deeper and completely too at ease voice called out. How had she known it was for her? "What you up to tonight?"

Tightening her first in preparation for a pounding against the too brave lecher, she turned towards him, ready to pummel away. Stunned silence and wide eyes met the sannin's large smile and watchful eyes and she greeted him with the tremendous respect he always automatically instilled in her.

"Jiraiya-sama, what are you doing here?"

"Waiting for you, actually." His gentle smile turned cheeky and decidedly…dirty, the kind she always associated with his illicit scheming.

She became concerned, too many 'what if' thoughts running through her mind and she almost panicked outright at the thought that something might really be up. "What's wrong? Is somebody hurt? Who's hurt? Do they need my help?"

"Now, now! I just wanted to ask you some questions! Just innocent questions! And no, they aren't for any 'research,'" he added after her threatening glare.

"Geez, you had me worried," she sighed, simultaneously relieved and miffed at the havoc his words had unintentionally caused. "So, what are these questions, then?"

"Hee hee," he laughed almost nervously…guiltily…even both, she was tempted to say. "Do you have a boyfriend?"

Her eyes narrowed dangerously.

"No? What kind of boys do you like?"

Her eye ticked in forewarning.

"If so, what do you like about him?"

She could feel a vein in her head _throbbing_. She grit her teeth, fists clenching around her books.

"What sorts of things - and _things_ - do you like to do with him? What would you _like_ to do?" he rushed.

Anger surged and a fist poised itself before him and hands were raised in a placating wave, one that went completely ignored.

"JIRAIYA, YOU PERVERT!"

She chased him all the way to the hokage's office.

* * *

'_Just send them on a few missions together, then. I'm sure you can arrange something.'_

'_Considering who the party in question is, I'm not so sure that will work. She's an excellent shinobi but she doesn't quite complement his skills the way a team should.'_

'_You'll figure something out, as always. That's why _you're_ the hokage.' _

'_This is _your_ scheme, not mine!'_

'_Hell, send her strictly as the medic.'_

_Do your own work.

* * *

_

Tsunade had sided with her, naturally, and offered no shelter to the older man, quickly shooing him from behind her and the room entirely.

"Now, there, Sakura. What exactly was he asking you?" She was ever the motherly figure, sitting close beside the livid girl and lightly embracing her, the arm wrapped around her giving gentle soothing pats.

"Things he has no business knowing!" she huffed, cheeks embarrassingly enflamed.

"Like…?" she prompted.

"Like-like…the types of guys I liked and what I would do with them and _all sorts of perverted crap he has no right to even ask me_!"

Tsunade withheld her laugh, amused at Sakura's own struggle between indignation and anger and for Jiraiya's absurd approach. Still, she had to give him credit for driving her here with the topic already opened and answers waiting to be spilled.

"What's the harm in that?" she voiced warmly.

"Because! I'm afraid it's going to show up in one of his books! Probably horribly twisted, too! I know people who _read_ those books!" It was easy to detect the horror in that outburst.

"Like Kakashi?"

Her shorter body tensed to impressive degrees and the flush on all of her exposed skin pulsed like a beacon. "No! No! No! No! I don't want to even _think_ about that! It's just too degrading to think of him reading that! And _he'd_ be the one to figure it all out. Damn him! I just couldn't live with that humiliation…! Ugh," She groaned.

The poor girl was bent over, face buried in hands and head shaking vigorously. Tsunade detected nothing outside the genuine mortification expressed and so let loose an amused chuckle, half expecting the girl to vomit from stress right there.

"I don't think he'd put that in his book… Well," she said, rethinking that, "that Kakashi would pin it down to you. That's far more credit than he deserves."

She ignored the shamed whimper her student emitted and pounced upon the opportunity – probably quite purposely - presented her. So she would take full advantage of it…figures he'd dump the work for his own idea on another; why did she always indulge him?

"So, how would you have answered those questions?"

She rose from her huddled posture and blinked at her mentor, bewilderment evident. A light blush crossed her cheeks in her more modest discomfiture.

"Well…I'm not sure, really. It's not something that I have a lot of time to devote to anymore…"

Tsunade placed her hands on each of the girl's shoulders and leaned around to peer into her face.

"Sakura, have you given any thought to marriage?"

"…What?"

* * *

The afternoon was long, the sun was hot, and _Icha Icha_ was oh so good under the abundant shade. The latest mission had been quite taxing in the way of control it took in putting up with the 'nobles'' attitudes. Just because one had better clothes and money didn't make for better persons. He had certainly never let it affect him… Although, he knew that had the circumstances of his childhood been different, he most likely would have turned out to be the typical rich brat. He looked up over his book as Sasuke's face over-imposed that of his when the two pictures of his teams merged in his mind.

He shook it away. Yes, he would have turned out differently. He knew there were things more important than prestige and _power_ now.

His book was in hand and he was quite comfortable against the shaded trunk. He fully intended to enjoy it. This particular installment to _Icha Icha Tactics_ was just so good he didn't know if he'd be able to put it down when it came time to! The hero was currently caught up in trying to infiltrate the enemy stronghold. He was stuck just outside the window, almost close enough – and longing – to step onto the sill and give his aching hands a needed rest from scaling the castle exterior. But there were occupants in the room the window belonged to and he would surely be seen if he gave in to the desire, so he was stuck gripping the wall like one of Konoha's very own tree frogs, suctioned to a trunk lest it fall. What would he do next?

He read on.

_The objective was to gather hard proof or physical evidence of an ongoing illicit affair between the two silently warring countries and he was in the process of doing that now with his skulking. He needed to get closer, however, and get a hold of something personal from both parties, to show undoubtedly that they were in the same room together. It would have to be something so incriminating to pin them, something only to be obtained in a certain state of undress or letters, something undeniable. Espionage was a tricky battleground that way. _

_He had to find something soon. He couldn't take much more of the woman's impassioned wailing. Their noise and preoccupation deepened the cover night gave him, the thumps and bangs of furniture as they pounded each other on them nullifying any scraps of soles his feet might have made. He skirted the wall, eyeing the quite _vigorously_ engaged couple every few creeping steps as he progressed through the room. _

_There, the lord's sword and the lady's fan. He stealthily toed the weapon closer, slowly dragging it by its strap. Carefully, he slipped his head and arm through and underneath the belt, avoiding any clanking from the metal of the scabbard and sword and adjusted it on his back. The fan was further out of reach and he resorted to a small star and wire. He fished it to him just as silently, watching both the treacherous participants and the slide of the mounted fabric, wishing it weren't so far away. It was in his hand. And folding it closed, pocketed it. _

_He hunkered against the wall behind the bureau, keeping to the endless shadows and waited out the night and their consciousness. The sun was just about to start its dawning. He snapped a few shots and fled to base._

_-:-_

_His neck and shoulders and hips were all being pulled at, his mask tugged on in effort to reach his mouth. Her lips were hot and fingers insistent as he let her assault him as she would. A leg was arduously trying to wrap around his as her body endeavored to be skewered by his. Her desperate and needy struggles were diminished to pleased and stewing squirming as his knee divided her legs and hit the solid surface; he pressed her into the wall. He let his mask be drawn down and met her hungry lips. _

"_What-" kiss "-can you-" kiss "-tell-" kiss and yank on shoulders "-me-" bite to lip and grab at his ass "-about Lord-" thrust against his hips as she pulled herself up on him "-Gin Yamanaka?"_

_She pulled back, hands sliding down to rest against the plane of his chest, and fixed him with a coyly naughty and giddy look from underneath her lashes. He held her gaze as her right hand trailed non-too-lightly downwards, fingers unabashedly feeling up his torso as they passed. Her gaze fluttered for that moment, returning when thin fingers slipped underneath fabric and partook in recreation. _

"_If you give me a _nice_ little treat, I may be able to part with some vital-" squeeze "-information."_

_He gave a half-tilt of his head. "Of course, Lady."_

_The motions of kissing and teasing were kept effortlessly as he allowed her to work on his clothes. The brief gust of air as his pants were gotten out of the way of her hand was turned to quickly scald him as her administrations easily countered with their flush of heat. He let their tongues occupy each other, the flow of push and retreat taxing their breath. Her hand and elegant fingers as they covered and trailed his-_

"Got a minute?"

"Mm." The annoyance was unusually clear by his questioning brow and tone.

Jiraiya glanced from his crouch in a neighboring tree from the book's cover to the irritated visible line of hair and let slip an amused and sympathetic smirk. "Tsunade wants to speak with you."

His expression dropped to one of resignation. He didn't want to be bothered with this today. "I just got back from doing seven consecutive missions, two completed at the same time, and she already has more work for me?"

"Are you asking for time off?" The smirk broadened just slightly, teeth barely visible in the now small and feral grin.

"No," he sighed, and folding the book in his lap, gave a slow blink in transferring his attention, "but a day would have been nice."

He only returned a knowing nod and look and stood along with the other man. He nodded over his head in the target direction. "Shall we?"

Kakashi only let forth another hardly audible sigh. Pocketing _Icha Icha_, he leapt.

* * *

He nodded to the regulars behind the missions table in walking through the anteroom to the hokage's office, Iruka and Genma two of the more prominent faces sticking out at him. Jiraiya was close behind and he could feel the room's curious attention on the sannin as they bowed to his passing; 'why was he there?'

He didn't bother to think along with them, not really caring why the Frog sennin took to following him all the way. It wasn't as if he weren't intimately familiar with the building. He'd been here most of his life and under three hokage now. It'd be more distressing if he _couldn't_ walk the layout in pitch blackness. He rapped his knuckle once against the door before opening it. He strolled in and came up short in a moment of surprise at his former student's presence. He offered a punctuated wave and blink before turning and approaching Tsunade.

The door was closed with an unusual degree of softness and he glanced over shoulder to see Jiraiya still present. He caught Tsunade pulling her vision from the other man and a scroll being held out to him. He looked down at it and made a quick calculation. Something was up if Jiraiya stayed for the briefing…or was she not planning to? She better, it had a B-class seal on it. And why was Sakura here? His fingers wrapped around the parchment and slowly took it, trading a suspicious almost-glare at the hokage. He didn't like this vibe at all.

The scroll was tucked into an available vest pouch and he gave a minute indicative inclination to Jiraiya. She just nodded; she wanted him here, then. He glanced at her desktop briefly before meeting her eyes and again signaled over his other shoulder. Here she furtively met the other man's eyes before returning to his. He saw it, she knew he did, but he wasn't sure she had wanted that. He turned to _just_ look over it, the effort purely to indicate the girl behind him. Tsunade used her chin to point at the pocket he'd stowed the scroll in.

"This is a B-class mission scroll," he said blandly, eye half-hooded. Was she serious to include Sakura on this?

"Yes, I know. I wrote it," she humored him.

"You're sure about this."

"Yes."

Behind her teachers, Sakura's eyes enlarged as she realized an entire conversation had just taken place almost completely silently. The others hadn't even been here three minutes and already something significant had happened and she missed it! She realized one thing pointedly, she _sucked_ at body language.

He released a breath and turned to silently ask about Jiraiya in the same manner. Tsunade raised her brows in open suggestion only to have an innocent look from the older man thrown her way. Jiraiya let a relinquishing palm-up wave accompany it and her encouraging look turned to a sharp scowl. She all but snapped her head back to him.

"We have a decidedly _difficult_ mis-"

"_Ahem!" _Jiraiya interrupted.

"Oh, shut it, you. I gave you your chance," she bit out viciously. She turned back to Kakashi with a genial business smile. "_Request_ for you," she finished.

He let his brow rise further and crossed his arms. "I'm listening."

Tsunade shifted to look over Kakashi's shoulder and spoke, "Sakura, would you step over here, please?"

Sakura pushed up from the pile of cushions on the floor and walked up to her teachers, sharing a brief look with Kakashi before both turned to the hokage for business. Did this mean what she thought it did?

Cha! Her first B-class mission!


	3. Chapter 3

The mission broke down into simple reconnaissance in which they were to record about a band of mercenary-nin said to populate the caverns on the Fire-Water borders. It was only a two week detail. She and Kakashi would stay low and watch them closely, keeping track of comings, goings, dealings, merchandise, moneys, and numbers. It looked to be a fairly easy – although tedious – B-rank assignment. And while she wanted to believe it would be, she knew the 'B' was not given lightly. Even so, she knew the fact that Kakashi would be there was the element behind her feeling secure. It would surely be dangerous and they'd most likely be killed if caught, but yeah, right, with Kakashi present.

She remembered what it was like going out on missions all the time and knew how to pack: necessities only. The pack would be bigger than any of their other trips simply for the length of time they'd be away. And without stops to refuel or rests at bases or friendly towns, preparations had to be adapted. So to prepare for what she could foresee – and the events that maybe she couldn't – she added just a few extra pairs of clothes, cramming them in before trying the same with extra medicines, bandages, kunai, and smaller operating tools. A last impulse told her to check her supply of stitching wire.

She remembered their last venture into Water country and knew that the decision to send Kakashi this time was a slightly risky one. Water Country– Mist in particular – would be so very giddy to finally get a hold of him; this added another degree of complication to the stealth mission. She'd been beyond surprised when they'd discovered their teacher was pretty well known the first time around. It was…flattering to know he was _their_ teacher and even more shocking when he said he took such pride in them. Everywhere they _went_ it was Copy Ninja this, Copy Ninja that with a healthy dose of fear and adrenaline at the prospect of him taking them down or vice versa. Although there was that one time when Sand-Baba called him something else…

'What did that mean?' she wondered, shoving hygiene products down the side until they hit bottom. She wanted them in easy reach not sight…just in case someone _else_ would have need to go through it. She hoped no one discovered his identity. She hoped none of the ninja they encountered recognized him, because then it would just be _so_ much more fun! Not.

But she knew if they were able to that Kakashi wouldn't let them get away.

Shoving one last bundle of clothes into the bag, she pulled the drawstring closed and secured it before flipping the cover over and locking it into place. Each utility pouch was given a pat to ensure everything was where it should be – her medic bag a rummage through – and after she strapped them all on, she tightened them. Satisfied, she swung the larger pack over her shoulders and headed out. The sound of the door closing on her bedroom was quite loud and left a profound feeling of loneliness to the empty room. At least she wouldn't be there to endure it.

* * *

The journey itself would take most of the day and so they had set out in the fairly early morning after she had met Kakashi near the gate. Well, more like he had met her, dropping down from a tree or the wall or something when she'd arrived at the indicated location. He had this _thing_ about being out in the open on a mission, she guessed. It was severely skewed, though, all the times he openly taunted them by reading while they 'trained' coming to mind. She…was almost offended his pack was bigger than hers.

"What the hell's up with _that_, Kakashi?" She squelched her anger as much as she could and pointed rather dramatically at the pack twice the size of her own. She imagined they looked pretty ridiculous having this petty altercation behind the main gate.

"Mm?" his brow rose at her. She was only given a quick sidelong glance before he flicked back to the gate now opening before them.

"_That_!" she pointed empathetically at the brown bag.

"Gear." He slouched even more.

"What happened to essentials only?" she semi-raged.

He held her gaze coolly. "This is a B-rank two week long reconnaissance detail. We'll need tents, some food, equipment for records, items for barter, and weapons. This just also happens to contain my few personal 'essentials', as you put it." His eye drooped more in preparation to further tease her. "You can carry it if you really want a bigger pack so badly."

"Ehehehehe," she laughed sheepishly. "That's alright. I'll survive without it," she waved him off.

"Hmm," he let out noncommittally and stepped forward as the gates parted. Sakura hopped to catch up to his longer strides.

* * *

Night was deepening quickly and she was looking forward to crashing. The journey had been tedious but not in a completely bad way. Kakashi had mostly kept quiet and to himself. That was nothing new and she was well adjusted to that. So instead, she did the talking for the both of them. He asked questions when he wanted further clarification, such as when she'd commented on Ino-pig thinking about going for the next jounin exams. He'd wanted to know how serious she thought Ino was about it. She didn't know. But she thought she was honestly considering it. It bummed her out. Ino was finally going to surpass her in a way that she couldn't catch up with.

"Why not take the medical jounin exams?" he'd interjected quietly.

"The what?" She'd been staring dumbfounded at him, completely lost.

"The medical jounin-level exams."

"Huh?"

He'd sighed and looked up to the sky.

"The equivalent of the jounin exams for the medical field." He'd given her a pointed looked before facing ahead again. "You may not possess the raw overall rounded abilities and power required of all battlefront jounin but you would be a tremendous asset in the medical department. They get deployed, too, for obvious reasons." Another look. "I think you'd do well."

She wondered. Would she really do as well as Kakashi seemed to think she would? It was a thought that would invade and occupy her mind and sleep for the rest of the night. And when her mind was occupied, her mouth was quiet. Like now, when she only sat on one of the rocks in a cave near their targeted area after an initial sweep by Kakashi for security. She could only dimly see him moving in the shadows, the stream trickling through throwing up reflected moonlight every so often onto his exposed sharingan and making it glitter before it went dark again. They were animalistic episodes, both frightening and captivating as she watched what she could of him prowling about the area, searching the cracks, and even underwater, for traps or shinobi.

He must have finished as he was approaching her now, hand going up to pull the band back into place over the sharingan.

"Well, everything looks to be in the clear," he said as he plopped down next to her and the packs. His hands deftly entered and retrieved a few objects before he pulled away and moved to the farther end of the decently sized cavern. Tinking, clunking, and a few thuds echoed in the air as he shoved smaller rocks out from behind a large outcropping boulder. There was a splash as one rolled into the stream. His form was lost as he went behind it. She gave him a few minutes before she asked what he was doing.

"Putting up the tent," he replied on the second trip back to retrieve more items from his pack.

Oh.

He'd given her a glance as he lifted them and made off to continue setting up their sleeping quarters.

"Are you alright?" His voice _just_ carried across.

"Huh? Yeah, just thinking…" she answered quietly.

"About what I said?"

"Yeah."

He was quiet for a moment and the clink of a stake driven into the ground filled the cave briefly before being swallowed by the rolling water.

'That was a good idea, Kakashi,' she thought to herself. Bedding down where the water would absorb any sounds they'd make would help shelter their surveillance in the next two weeks.

"You'll pass."

She looked up, not having expected anything more from him on it. "You really think so?"

"Yes." Another chink and he appeared from behind the rock to flash a little victory sign and smile, almost completely lost in the dark. He stood up and came back over, her eyes following all the way until he fell to his knees – with that damnable grace again – at the pack, once more. "Talk with Tsunade when we get back."

"I should help you, huh," she commented rhetorically, hands in lap, gazing at his arms twisting around in the bag.

"Hmm…yes."

* * *

The first three days and nights saw them alternating between subversive questioning of locals and solo and teamed surveillance sweeps. Last night had finally been the first successful pinpointing of at least _one_ of the rogue group's members. Kakashi seemed to be even more relieved than she for the break in the sheer numbing boredom the mission had been thus far. She had to admit she was as well for the fact that it meant their information was at least partially correct. Now they had something to work on; no more shots in the _complete_ darkness. Yet still, the fact remained that this wasn't anything to really go by. There was still so much that needed to be ironed out before they could take any positive action against them or concrete information back to Tsunade in preparation _for_ such action.

As it was now, she glanced into the tree to her left at Kakashi, his profile stern in his scrutiny of the men conversing below them. She flipped back to the subjects of their business. The one they'd identified as a target member was gesturing in what she would describe unquestionably as solicitation. The question that remained was _what_ he was trying to sell. If it was arms as Tsunade suspected, then that would pose a problem to both the Fire and Water countries. Who knows how many independent cells were running around planning who knew what with what intentions? Either way, well-armed mercenary groups would have to be neutralized. That was not their job this time around, however, and while she had an unbelievable amount of faith in her instructor, she didn't think they could take on a whole band of angry men.

Well, at the very least, not with her tagging along.

…

Why the hell was she beating herself up? Screw that! She came through when it counted! Cha!

…And when she didn't, she'd always been there to pick up the pieces. She mentally sighed; like with Sasuke. He wouldn't ever be quite the same but he _was_ getting better. He was trying, though, and sometimes it was just so hard to look at him - to talk to him - that she felt like each sentence from his mouth gouged more of their past away. Pretty soon, it would be as if it had never existed; or more like what had once been would be nothing more than a dream, so distorted and removed he'd made it.

Kakashi deliberately shifted in a manner meant to capture her attention and her thoughts, ears, and eyes turned to focus sharply on him. No words were risked. He signaled a quiet retreat as the group below them also began to disperse. She'd missed something, damn it. Throwing a last look to the emptying small clearing among the trees, she jumped after him. He was moving at a fast pace and she pushed herself to keep up with him. Had what she missed been urgent enough to require this speed in the effort to reach debriefing?

She shook her head sharply at her absentmindedness as she caught his heels, following closely as he led. The branches whipping across her face and over her arms were taken without complaint, a sort of punishment for having missed part of an apparently vital information exchange.

* * *

"It seems as if those propositioned will return in about three days with their answer," Kakashi said, not-so-idly looking around the area they currently stood in and adjusting his gloves. They had gone the direction opposite of their encampment to avoid any possible tag-a-longs in the rare chance that they'd been somehow detected. Why did she feel as if his current look was pointedly directed at her? She looked away in the direction he'd last been just moments before and fiddled with her kunai pouch. "We'll have to keep up constant surveillance runs in case the message was misinterpreted.

"Keep your head clear, Sakura," he admonished with a lazy droopy eye. "There is no room for inattentiveness at this level."

The warning was giving in typical Kakashi fashion, stern and not harsh but as gently as he ever gave on the actual mission field. She'd known better than to space off but why couldn't she ever help it when it came to Sasuke?

"I know. I'm sorry," she said, unable to meet his gaze.

He tilted his head slightly and his gaze fell to the ground in momentary consideration. "Is something bothering you?" he voiced quietly, tone expressionless and neutral.

"No," she shook her head. "Was just thinking."

He nodded. "Then next time make sure it's about what's happening in front of you." He gave her a quick once over. "Why don't you head back to camp, I'll do another reconnaissance run and meet you there."

And before she could complete the acknowledging nod to his command, he'd jumped up and disappeared among the foliage. She looked around, suddenly very alone, and slowly turned to do the same in the opposite direction, heading for the cave that was serving as their base of operations. She'd screwed up already.

* * *

He was back from the latest watch, she could feel him. He must have intentionally announced himself to her as he was usually untraceable, but she had most certainly _not_ expected him to be directly behind her as she turned to greet him, hand flying to rest on her chest as he scared the shit out of her.

"Geez, Kakashi!" she hush-yelled, not wanting to give anything away but still being crushed by the need to tease him. "Don't stand so close behind me next time."

He was eyeing the tent and for all appearances ignoring her somewhat playful banter. "I'm going to lay down for a bit. Keep watch." He bent slightly as he slipped into the tent, the flap closing behind him. "Wake me if anything's up."

She mentally scoffed at one, being completely ignored; two, like he wouldn't sense it in the first place to begin with; and three, that she was pretty tired herself and he'd taken the only tent.

That had bothered her at first, there being only one tent for the both of them. Where would she change if he was in there with her? Where would she sleep? _How_ could she with a man next to her? Not that she wasn't used to sharing personal space with him and the boys from all those years - a fairly large personal bubble at that - but this was just a _little_ close for comfort. Then logical Kakashi oh so frankly explained that only one would be in there at a time. Silly her to forego the need of patrols in her head like that.

Still, it had to be done and so she shuffled to the opening of the cave, standing in its mouth and simply looking out at the mist shrouded trees, rocks, grass, and water. It was peaceful right now and she took a deep calming breath, relishing how it made her feel so much lighter.

"You'll have to stand out of sight if you're to be any degree of effective," carried the whisper.

Her face fell. How the hell… She snuck a look over her shoulder to throw an annoyed glare at the occupied tent. Well, shit, if he didn't still surprise her. Shaking her head in disbelief, she flashed out of the sanctuary and settled into a tree a little ways away that provided good vantage of both the cavern entrance and a good portion of the surrounding area. The journey had not been so lax as a simple jump and she did a quick final check on all the chakra traps she'd laid behind as Kakashi had once taught her. Satisfied, she sat in semi-alertness on the bough, scanning the area with sharp eyes. The battle to keep from swinging her leg idly over the branch was a tough one as something about this position just demanded that motion be active when assuming it. The movement would surely announce her presence to others and that was something she was endeavoring to do in reverse.

Still, there was something about the morose atmosphere of the land of the Mist that drew her in every time. And before she knew it, she was reclined against the trunk, elbow on bended knee and leg swinging off the branch. She loved the mist.

* * *

He let himself take a moment to revel in the activity of stretching languidly, working out most of the cramps and tightness in muscles from too much action and not enough rest. He sighed, sitting up and almost rolling forward in a smooth action that resulted in his exiting the tent. He felt nothing in the immediately vicinity but still gave a cursory visual check, seeing nothing other than the water-condensed rocks and stream. Moving to the entrance, he lightly probed with chakra threads, locating Sakura and several faded copies of her signatures which he put down to sensory mines.

A thought crossed his mind and he discreetly moved closer to Sakura's position, enough to see her. Remaining buried within the foliage of the upper branches, he crouched and intently watched the subject of his soon to be implemented fun. His gaze flicked to a spot on the ground before returning to her, and preparing himself, he _pushed_ on the delicately laid mine and smirked under his mask at her reaction.

* * *

She'd realized at some point that she'd drifted off a bit and let her leg do what it would. Really, she didn't see any cause to forego any sort of relaxed activity. Their campout site had been void of all persons except themselves since they arrived. And as it was, boring and all without even introverted Kakashi to poke fun at, she let her mind wander. Besides, she'd left adequate security behind.

A spike flashed through her mind and she shot up, keeping silently to a low feral crouch upon the branch with bracing hand and kunai bared before her. Her eyes glared harshly at the triggered chakra trap and she sent her senses into peripheral scanning immediately, concentrating with more effort when her sight denied her a visual target. That trap had undeniably gone off so she knew someone was in the area. But she couldn't _see_ them yet. Another trap to her left went off and her focus was immediately shifted. Now she was worried. Two traps detonated and still no sign of the intruder. It was definitely a ninja out there, one beyond her capability to handle.

Her bottom lip got wedged between her incisors as her eyes and senses flickered back and forth and all over in thought. She needed to get Kakashi. She couldn't handle this alone. She slowly withdrew, keeping her kunai ready in front of her and inched along the branch. Backing up to the trunk, she gave a last peripheral sweep and turned, gathering her legs under her for the long jump to the next targeted tree. Her thighs clenched in preparation for the motion only to tense further due to a signature chakra presence.

She swiveled on the limb to face him and parted her lips, about to mouth to him the situation. All would-be explanation was negated as she saw his 'happy' expression and the guiltily embarrassed wave of his hand after having dragged it from the back of his neck. She could even hear his 'eheheh' from her perch.

"Why you no good, perved out, jacked in the head, failed excuse for a mentor, sadistic ass of a teammate!"

Oo, how she raved. He couldn't help the chuckle that escaped. He knew her buttons well. However, the actions he'd taken as guaranteed, he discovered, needed some revising as she launched herself at him, kunai extended. He swiftly jumped to a higher branch and noted the gouge the knife had made in the bark. His eyebrow lifted. He didn't think _Icha Icha_ would be making an appearance this battle.

* * *

The not so mock battle proved to be quite the welcome and refreshing exercise for the both of them. Sakura had been quite serious in the beginning, but let the fun of going up against Kakashi gradually morph into entertainment. Defeating him would never be a possibility for her and she knew it. She just wanted to stab him a few times.

As it stood now, she was currently sitting with outstretched legs on a plot next to the babbling creek eating. She was still _quite_ annoyed with him. She took a large bite of the rice ball and shot a harsh look to where Kakashi roamed somewhere in the treetops.

"Stupid jerk," she mumbled to herself around the bite. "Scaring me like that." She finished it off with a second and angrily chewed that as well, irritably chucking the napkin at where her pack lay on the ground. Thank Yondaime this mission was almost over.

* * *


	4. Chapter 4

It was the appointed meeting time and they were once again overseeing the trade. It appears the solicited group had bit and the dealer was most ecstatic in his latest market conquering. She counted three crates on the ground between the two sides and watched as the 'dealer' pried one open with a crowbar, the buying party crowding around the merchandise. In this case, it turned out to be an arms deal after all. The leader of the interested party lifted the top weapon from the crate and held it before him, turning it to view from several angles. Experimentally hefting it, he cradled it as if in battle, his mates gesturing between each other. Soon enough, they all nodded and gave a closing one to the supplier who returned a deep bow in gratitude for their patronage.

She shot a look to Kakashi at the signal the supplier made and the resulting noise of cart wheels. His hand was held out to her: don't move. She turned back. There were two carts entering the small gathering and they both watched in concern as one cart was unloaded onto the other. That was a big shipment. Still Kakashi signaled her motionless. They stayed a good twenty minutes after the last mercenary-nin was seen leaving the area.

He finally turned to her, voice serious, face stern. "We leave for Konoha tonight."

* * *

Tsunade's face was understandably contorted in worry at the news. Although Sakura couldn't really identify with all the reasons the hokage undoubtedly saw, she could definitely see how this development would cause problems not only for Konoha, but for all travelers between the Fire-Water borders. Heavily armed thieves on the road would provide for more income opportunities, certainly, but the danger level was such that it couldn't be allowed to escalate. Tsunade was frowning and Sakura mimicked her reflexively. Kakashi moved, shifting his weight from one foot to the other and she was reminded he was here, not to mention directly between her and the hokage. Maybe she should have likened it to being reminded that he was alive. He'd been standing almost over Tsunade as she thought. She knew him to be spacing off yet still aware of everything that was happening; that was just Kakashi. But the sigh that exited the hokage's mouth brought both Sakura's attention and Kakashi's eye to her.

"We can't let this go," she said, resigned, focusing an apologetic and well-worn look upon Kakashi as she met his gaze. "Sorry," she said with a half smile. "Wait for a moment and I'll write up the next one."

With that, Tsunade pulled out new parchment and put her re-inked brush to it. Kakashi remained unmoved with arms across his chest and did just that, eye once again staring over the older woman's head and to the side at a framed painting. She was unfazed and seemingly oblivious to his continued proximity. Sakura got the impression she was used to it. Sakura shifted from her spot on the cushions, his gaze on her but not as it went over her head as well. The tension in the room was getting to her, having increased since delivering their report.

Write up the next one? Another mission?

Tsunade moved and there was a gentle rustle of paper as she rolled the scroll. She looked up as she reached out her arm, hand bearing the new mission's details. Briefly following Kakashi's gaze before he pulled it away in order to take the scroll from her, she commented softly enough that Sakura had to lean forward to even hear what was being said.

"Do you never tire of looking at him?" There was something secretive in her mentor's smile and features, something sad and remorseful. Regret…and sorrow, Sakura identified. She was torn between the implications of what it could mean.

"No," he'd answered firmly, pocketing the scroll.

Tsunade looked like she'd expected as much and sat back. She was all business again. "See if you can't locate their base this time." She flicked her gaze over to where Sakura sat on the pillows not far away before returning to Kakashi.

"This is another B-rank classification. Combat is expected. There is no time frame, but please complete it as quickly as possible. If nothing is heard within two weeks, we will consider the mission a failure and send out retrieval teams."

Sakura swallowed in grim understanding while Kakashi only gave a half nod. He turned and moved to exit the room, Sakura jumping up to hurry after him. She met Tsunade's eyes as she passed, her teacher issuing a final warning.

"Be careful, Sakura. And check your medical supplies."

"Yes, hokage-sama," she bowed, sprinting to catch Kakashi.

* * *

There was something she had to ask Tsunade-sensei quickly, she'd explained, before apologizing and promising to catch up to him in only a few moments. At his expected silence and nod of approval, she sped back to the office to take care of one last personal bit of business before duty.

"You want to enter the jounin exams?" Tsunade said, somewhat shocked for the second time that day.

"Yes," she nodded. "But I need to brush up on my skills."

"Hmm, yes, I would recommend you do. Who did you have in mind for helping you?" she asked with a calculating look.

Sakura's eyes were wide, shocked at her observation. "How did you know?"

"I could tell by your face," she blinked at her.

She looked down to her clasped hands. "Oh, I see." She paused. "Kakashi said I should have you appoint someone to me."

Tsunade nodded firmly and went back to scribbling. "Kakashi can consider himself appointed."

Sakura's mouth fell open. What? Kakashi was so going to kill her.

* * *

There had been a brief deliberation over whether or not to set up camp in the same place they had before. After all things were considered, they decided not to and opted for settling on a location once they had pinpointed the base hideout. She was kind of hoping to get that same little cave again just for the peace and seclusion it had provided. Although she knew it was a luxury that really shouldn't have been available on such a mission, she still longed for it anyway. This latest mission had opened her eyes to how easy they'd had it while training under Kakashi. Not only had the missions been easy – if not dreadfully boring at times – the cut of pay they got, the length of assignments, and the gear that Kakashi almost always carried for them were such bonuses. Even now she realized how lucky she was that Kakashi was still doing most of the work.

Speaking of pay, she wondered how much she would get. The last mission hadn't been difficult by any means, but B-rank was B-rank. She looked forward to seeing _that_ paycheck. Hmm, would they split the earnings? She shot a quick look to Kakashi in debate, making a face as she mentally gave him a hard time. He'd have to fight her for his half.

They had been traveling the roads thus far but now switched to taking to the trees. They must be getting close to some kind of activity, she thought, and in need of the extra stealth the trees would provide. She was having trouble keeping up the pace and she was only lightly packed. How Kakashi did it with the majority of their equipment she had no freaking clue. She bet that weighed as much as she did!

"We're coming up on the clearing where we saw the trade. We'll stop and see if we can't get any clues to track them. What's the face for?"

"Ehehehehe, nothing!" she quickly inserted before turning to the side. Damn, he'd seen that expression after all!

And true to his word – as he always was, she knew! – they arrived at the clearing they'd previously stood witness over. Kakashi jumped straight down and she followed, albeit slower. Not that she was one to doubt him on the field, but they had observed quite the act here not that long ago. She looked around carefully as Kakashi bent down to place his fingers on the still matted wagon wheel tracks. His fingers were brought to his covered nose. Was he smelling the _grass_? His elbows were resting on his bents knees as he squatted and took his turn to peer around.

"Well…" he said ever leisurely, eyes roving the brush and treetops, "there doesn't seem to be any significantly lingering marks other than the carts so we'll have to go off that."

He stood and turned to give her a quick smile before jumping up. She followed and they continued on through the trees. She hoped they were getting close as she was more concerned about the thinning cover of trees than the distance and time spent traveling. A look was spared to Kakashi. Maybe he would get the drift?

"We're running out of forest."

So, he had noticed, she mentally commented in irony. Trust good ol' Kakashi to deliver the obvious with such an uncaring and straightforward attitude. She replied with likewise ire and a roll of her eyes, "Glad you noticed."

And just like that, they were out of forest. Both of their brows creased at the sudden death of tree-line at the river. Beyond was a large open plain of…dirt? Strange for such a desolate climate to be at the very edge of such verdant woodland.

"Hmm," he mused to himself. "Something about this seems…off." He cocked his head at the end. Reviving from his momentary thought-block, he stripped himself of the pack and told her to do the same.

"Let's do some scouting first then return for our things once we've solidified our next course of action." There most likely would be fighting ahead; best to be as light as possible for quick movement. He dragged the bags over to hide them behind some brush and layered them with a concealment jutsu. "Let's get going."

Well, the river wasn't that deep - she didn't think with Kakashi already knee deep in its middle and signaling her to follow - that they couldn't cross it. More like a stream really, she thought, as they were almost to the other side. Still, she would have thought it to already be sloping up being so near to the other bank. Must be a really steep and sudden drop off on that side of the river then. Was the water getting _deeper_ or had it been at her mid thighs since the middle. Why didn't they just water-walk across?

They found themselves abruptly and completely submerged right when both their feet should have stepped upon the shore. She burst above the surface and gasped, having been taken by surprise and losing most of her air at the sudden dunk. She worked her arms and legs to keep her head above water and turned to see a likewise drenched Kakashi staring at her with red and black, soaked hair drooping into his sight. He removed his hand from her arm after bringing her up from underneath the water and turned to glare at the suddenly far shore plus a visual target point: a large compound on a stretch of land. She didn't think that was within swimming distance…at least she hoped not.

"Genjutsu," he mumbled, obviously troubled and somewhat peeved at having missed it. "Let's regroup."

Well, she could now say it didn't matter if they'd surface-walked or not. The releasing of chakra on the 'shore' would have resulted in the same outcome as they broke the genjutsu. They swam back and stepped onto shore. Kakashi put a hand in his hair and vigorously shook it, trying to dislodge as much water as he could, she simultaneously wringing out her apron. He heaved a sigh and went to where he'd hidden their gear.

Pulling on his large pack, he turned to her, "We'll rest and rethink our tactics."

They set out for the cave they'd previously stayed in. The first thing he did – after checking for security integrity, of course – was build a fire; a decently sized and warm fire. Next, having pulled off his jounin vest and throwing it to hang from a rock, pulled out some spare clothes from his pack. He spoke aside to her, "I suggest you do the same."

Turning away, he reached down and began peeling off his shirt. She whipped around, cheeks flushing as what he'd said registered in meaning. Deciding that she needed to get out of these wet clothes and do something to occupy her mind with something other than what was going on behind her, she hastily reached into her pack to pull out a spare change as well. She gripped the dry shirt tightly in a fist as she removed the rest of her makeshift outfit. A mournful look was given to her apron as it was sat aside to dry. There was nothing to be done about that. It would just have to dry on its own.

She peeked from over her shoulder, having paused in her changing, and caught a glimpse of bare bottom as Kakashi quickly slid on dry pants. Her face flushed brightly and she jerked her head away, sweeping her embarrassed but unremorseful gaze from an unreadable happenstance glance he'd manage to connect hers with. She clenched her clothes in front of her chest, petrified. Oh, shit.

"Satisfy your curiosity?" he asked near tonelessly. She thought she heard amusement… Hell, she'd have found the situation in reverse almost amusing, then probably flattering after she got over her anger… She thought so, anyway.

"Not really." She wanted to laugh at her straightforwardness, probably would have if not for the mortification renewed at that outburst.

He laughed loudly before cutting it short. She turned wide eyes on him. Did he just display unbridled emotion? At her expense, no less? Oh, he did _not_!

"_What?_"

He shook his hand and coughed into his hand. "Nothing. Just not what I expected at all."

He was pulling on his shirt, and she watched as the movements of muscles caused his tattoos to ripple in fluid waves. She never would have figured him for the type, not in the longest guess. Still, it wasn't like he was covered in them as only a few adorned his body. Well, that she'd _seen_, anyway. She idly wondered if he had more. What she could glimpse of the one on his arm was awesome in its appearance and she wondered what it pictured. She knew from the ANBU members she worked on that it was eerily close to where they wore theirs, but she knew that couldn't be what his was. Kakashi-sensei wasn't _that_ cool. Still, the one low on his back was damn wicked. She wanted to get a closer look at that one.

His shirt slid over it.

She turned back to the garments still in hand and sighing, slipped it over her head. The wet brassiere would have to be dealt with…she hadn't brought a spare of that. _WHY_ had she taken that particular short-cut? She should have known that the one item consciously left out would be the most uncomfortable to bear. Scuffing behind her elicited a quick peek over her shoulder to reveal Kakashi sitting on a smaller rock before the fire, carefully unrolling scrolls as he took them from their pockets and laying them flat to dry in the heat from the flames.

Her brows drew together and she shuffled over to sit slightly across from him, leaning forward on her knees. "Will they be alright?" she asked delicately as she observed how carefully he seemed to be handling them.

He nodded.

She was immensely thankful that he was ignoring the little peep show earlier. That would be uncomfortable to discuss. She looked to her interlaced fingers as she wiggled them, feeling as if the silence was somehow her fault. She knew she hadn't done anything wrong or that he was angry or even annoyed, but she felt there should be some kind of conversation, no matter how inane. She was going to babble soon to fill in the silence, she just knew it. She glanced up from her clasped hands over to him again, smiling at how small he looked in the black shirt minus the jounin vest. He was so cute bending over his scrolls and tending to them so lovingly, dwarfed in that baggy shirt of his!

"You're pretty ripped, sensei."

He looked up in uncertainty. Damn it. That did _not_ just leave her mouth.

"What?"

She could understand his confusion; she was too.

"It was such a surprise. Ahahaha! I didn't expect it, especially when that shirt makes you look so skinny," she laughed embarrassedly, hand going to rub at the back of her head.

He blinked at her, quiet and undisturbed voice carrying over the crackle of fire. "Are you alright, Sakura?"

"Ahahahaha, no!" she cried. "I'm horribly embarrassed!" Her hand fisted in her own hair.

"Mm," he nodded sagely, returning to his scrolls and fire. "I would be, too."

Her mouth flung wide open as her jaw dropped. What the _fuck_, Kakashi?

"Kakashi-sensei, you _jerk_!" She made sure her pointed finger of death conveyed all her anger and repeatedly stabbed it in his direction. He only gave her that dumb look. She gave up and flopped back with a huff. "Ugh!"

He motioned with his hand, 'give it here.' Her brows drew together and she shot a look behind her at his pointing. "Hand it to me to dry."

She meekly reached over and grabbed her apron, surrendering it to nimble fingers that laid the heavy fabric out just as lovingly as if it were one of his scrolls. Hmm, well, that was unexpected. At least she'd get a dry apron to go with a wet bra out of this.

Some time passed with only quiet between them. However, unlike before, this passing was companionable and stress free. Neither felt the need to inquire anything of the other, and both seemed content to let it pervade. There was a simple joy in just sitting. It was a nice change and certainly something she was not accustomed to sharing with Kakashi. That alone made it all the more enjoyable; another experience to add to the short list of meaningful events – okay, okay, just 'events' –in which Kakashi was apart of…outside of life-endangering situations, she should say. Because there really were _so_ many instances in which Kakashi had saved her. And she knew in the most humble of ways that if he hadn't, she would have been left far behind Sasuke and Naruto long ago.

"So, any ideas about how we're gonna get there?" she asked in her cheerful voice. "I just know Kakashi-sensei already has this planned out three ways and back." She batted her lashes for good measure.

"Mm," he nodded.

"Well?" She gave him such a bright smile. "What's Konoha's beloved genius ninja have in store for the bad, bad enemy nin?"

"Walk up to it."

Her face fell. "Oh, I see." She should have known. "Figures."

He touched his fingertips to each scroll before rolling them back up. He must have decided them to be dry enough. His hand was pressed flat against her apron before picking it up. Tossing it to her with what she would call an apologetic look – she was really just going by the slant of his exposed eye, here – he spoke, "Sorry, it's still a bit damp."

It seemed his vest was in much the same shape judging by the sigh she watched him emit before slipping long arms into it. He zipped it shut and began to methodically replace all the scrolls into their rightful places.

"I suppose we better keep moving then, huh?"

She didn't even have to look to see his nod.

* * *

He'd instructed to leave the gear behind. They would once again use this as their campsite and would return after the success of their night's prowling. She was all too happy to leave the unnecessaries behind in favor of the lighter and more portable kunai and medical packs. Having arrived at the 'river' once more, she turned to him and asked, "What do you plan to do now?"

His lifted brow only said 'please.' His hand was raised before him and the first two fingers took on a steepled form, his other coming to rest on her shoulder. Shifting his gaze back out across the far bank, he commanded, "Kai."

The illusion dissipated before them and she looked on as dirt gave way to water while the river expanded into an impressively wide lake. She met his all too happy gaze. They stepped out together upon the lake's surface, their feet sending out ripples like the skipping stones they emulated. It was going to be a long walk.

* * *

She was _just_ peeking over the top of the wall, fingers wrapping around the top of the cement to help hold some of her weight. She scanned left and right repeatedly, taking her time in scouting the enemy compound grounds for anything that would prove troubling. She pulled back to slink behind the brick wall and looked down past her legs to where Kakashi stood with hands on her ankles, supporting her as she balanced on his shoulders. Having sensed the shift of tension in her muscles, he lifted his head enough to meet her eyes. He had to crank his neck to see around the medic apron she was always with in order to see the small shake of the head she gave. He returned a single nod, hands sliding up to pat the back of her calves twice in quick succession; hop down.

She gave him a smile – somewhat condescending, if you asked him – and a pat on the head as she whispered down to him, "Aw, such a good little Kakashi-sensei, being so patient while I look around from on your shoulders."

His eye hooded at her comment but he let her jump down unhindered, verbally or physically. That's not to say he wasn't tempted to harass her in return, but the mission and all… Instead, he turned to face her, hands in pocket and eyebrow arched. Well?

"The nearest entrance of the compound is on the east side, here. It's roughly thirty meters from this wall. If we were to jump it, I'd suggest doing it from the south and east corner junction to provide the most ample coverage," she reported, using hand gestures to illustrate her calculating.

He nodded, looking at the top of the wall. "Nice job, Sakura." Turning to look at her, he phrased cheekily, "So, you want to go first?"

She just shook her head in long-standing sufferance and shrugged. Her hands went to his shoulders and foot into his cupped hands as Kakashi propelled her upwards in a smooth boosted jump. Settling easily in a crouch, she made for the juncture of the indicated walls in a creeping crawl, not even bothering to check behind for Kakashi's flawless landing. When he caught up to her at the drop down point, they did so together. It would be a straight-line dash – and she meant _dash_ – across the open field to the compound. They would have to be quick, even with Kakashi's shielding technique, to avoid detection. She waited for his last seal to form before racing across the grass, her teammate trailing closely behind her.

As it was now, she stayed crouched low in an actual planter outside the east entrance walkway, awaiting a 'clear' signal to join him in entering the stronghold. She could see him fairly well from between the twiggy branches of whatever bush she was in, his normally undistinguished profile blurred even farther by the sharp angle of his head as he scouted around the corner and by the deep shadows he stood within. The sign came and she sprinted the distance between them, coming to press flat against the wall and taking up his recently vacated position as he scooted inside. She waited patiently, knowing caution was the issue, and again held off for Kakashi's all-clear. It came by way of a hooked finger around the corner and she mimicked his slithering entrance, sticking to the bends and curves of the wall and shadows.

She stopped beside him momentarily before seeing the half throw of his head to continue past him. She did, coming to a halt at the next doorway. The next room she took charge of, peering carefully around the doorframe. There were a few softened thumps behind her and she whipped her head to see what had happened. She jerked hard against the wall at the body too close beside her and pulled back, being slammed further into it as a hand smash against her mouth, stifling her cry of shock.

The arm pressed across her clavicle kept her attempt to see over her attacker's shoulder from succeeding and she was forced to shoot off a quick glance around the body even as her knee to the groin was blocked. The retaliating punch to the solar plexus sent her crashing to the floor. She saw the mop of Kakashi's hair as he lay face-first on the wood boards of the floor, obviously passed out, a heavily booted foot pressed to the back of his neck. How the hell did they get past him? Her heart constricted, knowing that it was no clone or jutsu illusion and that she was seriously outclassed. He was really down.

'Kakashi…' she mentally called him, reaching hand smashed to the floor by a boot at the wrist. Kakashi faded from her vision as an arm snaked around her waist, the sensation of being lifted mixing nauseously with her rapidly encroaching unconsciousness.

* * *

"Genjutsu," he whispered, angry with himself for having missed it _again_.

She hummed to herself in contentment, snuggling further into the hard but pleasant warmth. She tried to lift her arms in order to squeeze the body-pillow tighter, frowning momentarily when they seemed to be weighed down by something. Instead, she settled for shoving her face as far into the cozy corner as she could, pressing her body as closely as possible in the sleep-ridden hopes of being absorbed into it. She hugged it as much as her heavy arms would allow, not at all thinking about why the stretched limbs wouldn't respond as desired. She sighed again, and although briefly given pause at a deep rumbling following it, quickly resumed after it was delegated to 'dream stuffs.'

"Sakura," he said again, a little more forcefully than before as his frustration at her sleepy-head nature was allowed to creep in. There was no need to raise his voice more than anything beyond a whisper as her ear was right next to his lips. He had only to turn his head a few millimeters in order to have the cloth brush against her. Still nothing from her. He _really_ wished she would stop squirming. "_Sakura_."

"Eh?" she blinked rapidly, trying to dispel the stubborn sleep.

She lifted her head slightly, giving a sleepy frown at the depleting warmth in the motion, and jerked harshly as she realized the situation. She tried to pull away enough to look him in the eye and managed just barely to do that. There was an audible swallow as the slight distance just allowed her to miss connecting their chins, his eye swinging to meet hers. She tugged hard on her arms to push herself further off him, held unshakably in place by shackles that bound both their arms above his head.

Her gaze was shifted across the slight gap between them to their hands to gauge how soundly restrained they were. Pretty well, she'd say, as the two chain strips had one of her hands to one of his per chain; meaning they'd both have to be freed of each chain in order to escape. She lifted her body enough to look down both their lengths from where she lay atop his on the floor. The chains that looped around each of their wrists and through a wall anchor seemed to be the only thing holding them here. She supposed their current position was meant to be the most effective way of assuring their immobilization to their captor.

"How'd we get like this?" she asked, confused and still more than a little shaken that they'd pulled one – now two - over Kakashi.

His eye closed in some emotion she couldn't name. "Genjutsu." Opening it again, he looked around as much as he could with her pretty much blocking all angles as she was before coming to rest on her again. "And a fairly skilled specialist, I'd say."

"Hmm," she thought, "let me see if I can get loose."

"No, Sakura, wait-!" he tried to stop her. She proceeded to pull on the chains and he mirrored her force, letting her use his counterweight for leverage in order to sit up. Her torso clenched and she pulled into herself, trying to get her legs out from under her. She was doing pretty well, actually, but the chain lengths were so short that he feared it would only make things worse. He looked up to his fists, red from her pressure and the cuffs cutting into them. "Almost there?"

"Yeah, I think I can get it. Just a few more seconds-" She cut herself off as her right foot slipped, having caught the edge of his pant leg and tangling in the slack fabric. It sent her crashing back down with a heavy impact that pushed air from his lungs, the rest rushing out as her desperately flailing leg caught him, knee smashing into his testicles. The resulting growling groan was quite adequate in communicating his distress. Sakura seemed to have noticed right away what she'd done given her immediate reaction.

"Oh, my god, Kakashi! I'm _so sorry_!" she fretted, instantly scrambling into the position she'd been fighting for to now sit on his abdomen. She tried to pat his chest to try and soothe the pain away but the short links only allowed her fingers to almost-reach his forehead. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to!"

He lolled his head toward her, trying to grunt out any kind of noise that said he knew, but was only able to release another agony induced noise from deep in his throat. He managed to get his head far enough over that he made fleeting contact with her wide eyes before falling to the side again and nudged his head against his stretched arm. It was a futile attempt to rub away the ache. Of all the experiences in his life, that was still the most painful thing in existence.

Sakura gasped, taken aback by how much that'd really hurt him. The lone tear on the verge of spilling as he turned away from the corner of his watery, rolled back eye hadn't been missed. She'd heard that it was a _very_ painful thing for men, but to see it reduce Kakashi to this told her it was down right _excruciating_.

"I'd make it better if I could. Tell me what I need to do. What do you need?" She owed it to him. She would never want to cause him this amount of pain. Surely he knew.

He gave only a weak shake of his head at first, his still raw voice trembling out a command, "Time. Just…don't move."

She nodded, so very eager to make things right. Damn, she was sorry. But apparently this was something that had to be worked out of the system. So she quietly sat on him and gave him time, intent eyes roving his face and detailing the changes in the states of dissipating discomfort he went through. She rode his sigh, watching as his turned away face issued a significantly relaxed expression. With a blink, all traces of pain were erased. Although she suspected highly it was still there, he'd just made it invisible, hidden it behind his mask as he always did.

"I have an idea," he said, voice strong, quiet; normal again. He looked to her before gazing back up at the anchor through which their bounds tied. "Do you think you can get a kick off?"

She followed the line their arms made to the wall, brow firming as she planned. "Yeah, I should be able to."

He nodded, ignoring the motion made awkward by his position as much as he could. "Good, then get ready to get a good one off."

His hands started to move rapidly in what she'd just begun to recognize as a strong fireball jutsu before pulling back as far as the chains allowed. The rush of heat against her face blew her hair back in the rapidly expanding air. The high temperature was drying out her eyes but she continued to watch the line of fire as it streamed from Kakashi's still masked mouth to beat against the iron shackles. The epicenter of the metal was just beginning to glow a healthy red-orange before a loud bang of a slamming iron door forced both their heads to whip in that direction. Sakura's short hair swung in its flight to messily frame her face. Kakashi's torso contracted as he lifted his head far enough to see, the fire instantly disappearing at the interruption.

Two heavily armed, gun-toting guards came through the low entry to spread against the wall on either side, what they presumed to be the leader ducking through behind them. Straightening, he bestowed a broad gesture of fanning arms, hands open with palms up alongside a condescending grin. The robes that flowed about him were deep reds and purples with gold cords acting as belts and accents.

"Welcome to my humble little abode." Sakura positively hated the self-assured aura that was rolling off the man. Her eyes narrowed at him, although she felt nothing from Kakashi. "Imagine my delighted surprise when I discovered that the one and only _notorious_ Kakashi of the Sharingan was in _my_ dungeon. Hah! What good fortune hath been given me!"

He turned and paced to the side of them. Sakura scowled openly, the 'Man' reminding her far too much of some crooked and self-proclaimed leader of faith, intent to sow disharmony. His hands were brought before him in a clasped manner as if thanking the benevolent being responsible for his recent turn of extraordinary luck.

"Now, the only dilemma I'm faced with is who to hand you over to." Sakura couldn't help but notice that the man was very careful not to take any steps closer to them. At least he wasn't stupid, but he did turn to face them and lean close. "Who would pay the highest ransom for your head? Or should I say eye?"

She almost turned to look at Kakashi as she felt something change, the muscles beneath her shifting in preparing for action. Instead, the negated action came across as a stilted jerk towards him, her eyes never leaving the enemy.

"Water? _Mist_?" the man continued, oblivious to what was happening beneath her, the bidding war he was envisioning starting over Kakashi taking precedence. "Or Fire? How much would Fire pay to get their most beloved ninja back?"

"Now, Sakura!"

His voice was strong. It grounded her in reality and she reacted, immediately lashing out with her right leg in a straight forward-kick. The weakened metal shattered under the heavy sole of her sandal to rain down upon Kakashi. He rolled forward, pulling on the back of her knees to bring them against his chest and tucking her close in the roll. Coming out of the somersault had him gripping her hands in a tight clasp as he supported the push-off from his chest to send her flying at the guard on the right while he dived for the left. Two successive thuds saw both targeted enemies landing on the floor one after the other. They both turned to face the man before them, their former captor no longer so confident.

"Wait! I can arrange a deal-" he pleaded, hand out in a ward as he slowly backed up.

Kakashi was never one to deal with nonsense. The kunai he'd relieved the guard of flipped in his hand, swinging around his middle finger only to be grasped in an offensive hold. He gave a parting admonition to the enemy, correcting him on a fatal flaw before springing forward. As if Fire would ever endanger anyone in order to secure him. "You give me too much worth."

Sakura turned her focus to the two guards to assure their deaths, the sight of Kakashi standing beside the newly decapitated enemy and rolling head no longer holding her interest. There was a thud as the body finally hit the floor.

"These two are down," she spoke over her shoulder to him, turning her head the rest of the way at the new noise. The rustling revealed Kakashi to be wrapping the head in fabric from the man's own body, the rich and undoubtedly expensive material now serving as his shroud.

"What's that for?" It wasn't part of the mission, but then again, neither was any of this. There were only supposed to locate the base. She knew what he'd say if she questioned even entering it. He'd say, 'We had to make sure it was the right place, right?' She made a note to mentally sigh at him later.

"Proof."

"For Hokage-sama?" She nodded to the thickly wrapped ball resting against his thigh as he stood straight; well, as straight as Kakashi ever got. "Do you think this will end the mercenary problem?"

"Hardly." He was so positive. "At best, they'll fight amongst themselves, take a few of each other down, before starting up again under new leadership." He walked past her, ducking through the low doorway.

She rose from her crouch and followed suit, commenting, "He was surprisingly easy."

"He was a businessman, not a shinobi," his voice carried back to her. "And how nice of him to illustrate that by hanging our things right outside our cell," he observed wryly, hand reaching out to grab the weapons holsters they'd been stripped off the wall. She sidled up behind to take hers. Both took a moment to rummage through and make sure all was where they'd left it. Check.

"Make haste back to camp. We'll leave for home immediately."

They were all shadows as they fled the compound and into the relative cover of forest.

* * *

End.

About using Japanese suffixes. I don't like it, at all, but made an exceptionin the Naruto fandom simply because it was ported that way; meaning the English release still employs them, so they are present here. As a personal use, they are wonderful for showing Sakura's state of mind when thinking about Tsunade and Kakashi, the -sensei, hokage, and -sama bits all meaningfully placed.


	5. Chapter 5

She watched as they strode over to her from the office doorway, Kakashi on point as Sakura trailed behind. Where Sakura stopped to flop on the cushions, Kakashi continued up to the desk and dropped the purple and red cloth-bound ball on her desk. The loud banging thud it made as it landed still elicited a small jump, even with it having been expected. Giving the object a distasteful look, she turned to Kakashi with raised brows, silently questioning the man as he stood shoving hands in pockets before her.

"What's _this_?" she asked, poking it with the end of her brush as her lips quirked.

Kakashi reclined more into his slouch and replied with his usual apathy, "Their leader."

"Ugh," her face contorted. She'd turned to the side in nausea. They both watched – Sakura somewhat more eagerly; she loved to learn more about those around her – as Tsunade was overcome with resignation. "Can I take it to mean the source of our problem is solved?"

There was a slight shake of the head from Kakashi. "Hardly. It is only a matter of time before they start up again. However," he sighed out, "it should at least delay them enough for another team or three to clean up."

Tsunade nodded, siding with his knack for tactics. She also smiled internally at the subtext behind his words. He was _most_ bored with that assignment and would have nothing further to do with it. Still, one or three squads?

"Three teams? Isn't that a bit much?"

He lazily blinked. "I don't believe so. There was a rather skilled genjutsu artist covering the compound. Twice we fell to the illusions."

Tsunade's eyebrows involuntarily rose in stunned surprise, and while her comment held teasing, there was real concern behind it. In reality, there was more concern than mirth for the facts that Kakashi praised the enemy on his skills and that he fell to them not only once but _twice_. Genjutsu certainly wasn't his strong point, but Kakashi was perceptive as hell. For him to have missed it was a very real danger. Not to mention Sakura, one of the stronger shinobi apt in genjutsu techniques, was with him. Surely the illusion would have been detected with the both of them together. But since that wasn't the case, she would have to assign a specialist to at least one team, preferably two.

"Any chance _that_ was our 'artist?'" she said, pointing the end of the brush at the head.

Kakashi firmly shook his head. "He was only the supplier-dealer. Complete lack of shinobi skills."

"Alright, I'll take your advice into consideration," she sighed out, eyes falling to fingers playing with her brush.

Kakashi nodded. Was it her or did he straighten just a bit. "Any new missions for me?" The hokage shook her head. He cocked his head before making an abrupt turn and exiting the room.

Sakura, having been left behind, met Tsunade's gaze and gave a little embarrassed wave. "Anything for me?" she asked sweetly.

Bending down under her desk, Tsunade withdrew the arm to slam a heavy stack of books down upon it. The enemy head rolled off the front accompanied by another scowl. "Read these by next week and meet me at the hospital in two hours."

Sakura's head dropped in defeat. She thought she'd get lucky like Kakashi-sensei. Damn.

"And someone get rid of this head!" Tsunade yelled.

* * *

Books were in hand – or should she say arms – while on the way to the hospital to wait for her medical session to begin. She'd planned to get some _light_ reading done before Tsunade pulled her away for what was likely to be the rest of the night. Saying 'hi' and giving a bright smile to one of the nurses who was getting off – man, was he the hot one she never got tired of looking at – she noticed his right hand lightly wrapped in bandages. Her mind halted, foot freezing in mid step.

Visions of badly burned and blistering hands flashed through her brain before whispered breath gave reason to the mental assault; Kakashi. She could feel the heat on her face as her hair whipped, light playing against her eyelids before they opened to watch the stream of flame from his masked lips beat upon the wall anchor. The iron ring was glowing with the accumulated heat, the thinner chains looping through it pulsing in the boil. And as she was leaning as far back as the chain would allow to escape the flame, Kakashi's hands were directly under the fire.

"Shit," she whispered to herself, oblivious to the closer passer-bys who sent looks her way. He hadn't complained once or even given any sign of favoring them. Wait, her mind commanded. A memory of Kakashi glancing at his left hand's minor clench after putting down their pack sped by in hindsight. She had to find him.

She apologized to the nurses behind the desk as she threw her books behind it, shouting over her shoulder that she'd be back to get them. Breaking through the front doors once more had her racing down the steps, wave upon wave of chakra sent out in radar searching. Feeling the correct echolocation of her former instructor and newly-turned teammate, she pivoted towards the epicenter of waves. Weaving through the throng of villagers in the market place eventually brought visual contact of that green jounin vest topped by moonlight hair. He really had such a unique color and she'd found that that adjective was still the most appropriate to describe it as; for it was neither white nor grey, rather somewhere in between, ever shifting and as fickle as the reflected light of the orbiting satellite.

"Kakashi-sensei!" she called weaving the last distance through the crowd to him. "Kakashi-sensei!"

He'd paused in his stroll and tossed a half look over his shoulder, fully facing her as he registered her presence. She had strong suspicion he'd known her identity from the first call of his name but chose to ignore his usual game of nonchalance. She was on a personal mission, and really, any good shinobi would do all they could to look after their teammate. This was especially true when one was in the know of the other's specific _lack_ of self-maintenance.

"Yo," he voiced, wave absent, hands deep in pockets. She noted it immediately.

"What, no enthusiastic wave for your most favorite student?" she baited with a straight face and false cheer in her voice.

"Oh, you know," he shook it off with a tilt of his head, "can't let you get too used to preferential treatment and the coveted Hatake 'effort.'"

He shifted weight to one heel and cocked his hip and head in a _very_ irksome manner. Her gaze narrowed sharply. Was it her getting better at reading him after all these years or was the Copy Ninja trying too hard? His arms pushed deeper into his pockets in the strange silence between them even as people continually moved around their palpable bubble. Her eyes zoned in on the action. Closing the few steps, she pressed in close and seized his wrist, noting the slight pinching of his brow as she pulled the hand free. She flipped it over to briefly look at the palm visible underneath tattered fabric remains, features softening as she diagnosed the damage.

"I knew it. Idiot," she breathed, cradling his left hand and gently peeling off the glove. She submersed it in the glow of chakra, applying the burn relief she'd studied in theory and much-used hospital practice. He'd only looked down at the object of focus, making no noise as she worked. She in return remained quiet and concentrated on mending the blistered and peeling skin, both choosing to grant the other their relative pride. "You could've told me."

He remained silent even as she roughly gestured for his other. However callus the put-on, her touch was just as gentle as before. He flexed it lightly as she drew back and pushed hair behind her ears, testing the newly mended and soothed skin of the one hand as she stuffed the remains of his gloves into the other. Good as ever.

He turned to continue on his way, speaking over his shoulder. "Good luck with your test."

She stood perplexed and stance askew as she watched him walk away. Was she missing something? "What?"

Stupid jerk. He could've at least _thanked_ her.

* * *

Damn that Kakashi! How had he known? Tsunade had popped a completely random test on her that evening. She easily passed with all the knowledge in her brain, but _damnit_, she hadn't seen that one coming at all. Good thing she'd managed to at least skim most of the content in the reading Tsunade had assigned earlier. She hated to think what an impression that would have made if she'd failed! Guess she shouldn't have been so quick to jump on Kakashi for walking away without thanking her. Figures he'd do so in his own round-about way.

Ooo! Couldn't he have made the hint just a little more obvious? Her expression dropped in self-pity. She knew well his tactics and outlook on life, especially where 'hints' were concerned. If he'd even deigned it effort-worthy enough to have attempted to reveal _any_thing, then he didn't deem them credible enough to advance any farther in the shinobi world – or life – if they couldn't pick up on it. While she had viewed him as particularly cruel early in her career, she knew his strict outlook was really much more beneficial than detrimental. Still…even today she found herself cursing his tactics. As annoying and frustrating as it had been at times – oh, _Yondaime_, there were times she thought she'd never see the next hour – she realized she wouldn't have made it as far under Tsunade as she had if he'd been any different.

And was that woman ever far more trying than Kakashi-sensei! Well, in some areas. She thought she preferred Tsunade all around. For while she could eventually meet Tsunade-sensei's physical and mental challenges, she knew Kakashi's were largely still out of reach. Some of it had to do with physique, men naturally being at an advantage in that arena, but his mental puzzles were a _whole_ other issue. She tried to avoid them if it could be helped, only taking them on if she wanted a good mental fucking over. Seriously, he could warp thought pathways as if they were his own, as if he'd sunk his fingers into the mush of the brain's tissue and squished it around to his own direction. Mm, but oh the satisfaction when she _finally_ got one of his riddles! It was as lifting as it was humbling and awe inspiring as she realized just how brilliantly intelligent he was. There were times where she just lusted after that mind of his!

Speaking of lust, she could _really_ go for a doughy pastry right about now. Time to replenish all the energy she'd frazzled away during that surprise exam. Licking her lips in anticipation of sugary sweet stress relief, she hugged her newest load of books to her chest and weaved out of the hospital towards the local café…which should just be unloading their closing bargains by the time she got there.

Pushing the disturbing deja vu images and feelings from her person, she hurried toward her destination hoping to completely bypass a return visit from Jiraiya. She shuddered at the lecher's unabashed resolve and clenched the bound volumes tightly. But no matter how severe the tremor, her body couldn't shake the hokage's unsettling parallel questioning.

Marriage? Why would she have given any thought to that when she'd yet to have had a boyfriend? But the visions of happiness she envisioned it to be still floated behind her eyes. She hadn't told Tsunade all of them, how could she when some she deemed too silly or embarrassing to speak about? Instead, she had divulged the general expectancies she viewed her hopefully eventual marriage to include. It was hard to give any specifics because she didn't know what her husband would look or even be like so her children were just little shadows in her mind.

Their exact features would be assigned once she knew who she would marry – or when she fancied someone enough to project his characteristics onto the fictional offspring. She had indulged vividly with Sasuke even after _really_ knowing he would never be that for or to her; things were too different now - and he too jaded - to where she could no longer see the children they would have made. But those 'children' were still there, the little shades that moved and played but remained undefined. And they would until a new significant crush came along to fill them in. It was as beautiful as it was sad and she wanted to embrace the hollow shells as much as she wanted to push them from her thoughts.

While the hokage hadn't refrained from inquiring about more personal issues in the past, she couldn't help but feel that this subject was a little weird. She couldn't put it past Jiraiya because that man was…well, _Jiraiya_. And not that Tsunade-sensei's line of curiosity had been crude or anywhere close but there was something there, something connecting the both of them. She was missing the underneath underneath.Or so she felt.

This was such a morbid topic.

Where was that freaking pastry?

* * *

Now, in all honesty, foresight, knowledge, and experience, she should have known better than to cram three-fourths of it into her mouth at once. That goes doubly so when doing said action on _any_ public patio of _any_ location because as soon as the action is performed, someone comes along that the performer would rather not have had witnessed. And then there's always that sticky situation that follows where one chokes on their own food in embarrassedly guilty gluttony.

"Yo, Sakura-chan!" He was entirely too happy for her tastes, she glowered mentally. She tried to redeem herself from all the icing that was surely plastered to her lips, hurriedly wiping the back of her hand across them. "What are you doing out so late?"

"Ahaha!" she laughed in genuine embarrassment and waved him off. "Oh, you know, just relaxing after a _surprise exam_ and all."

"How did that go?" he asked lightly, sliding into a chair at the table and feigning total ignorance.

"Pretty well, actually."

"Oh, that's good."

He'd stated it so blasé, like he'd been expecting it all along and his posture reflected his nonchalant state. She was leaning on the elbows of folded arms and had to turn her head to look at him. He wasn't directly across from her and holding this angle to watch him for too long would surely give her a headache later. When did he pull that book out? His lazy eye was drooped in reading and only just visible over the bright cover. There was silence, though not uncomfortable…but she knew this routine.

"So, Kakashi-sensei, what are _you_ doing out so late?" She asked just as lightly as he had and brought her hands up to rest her chin upon, mimicking his intent to poke fun and batting her eyelashes for good measure.

"Late?" his voice quirked, eyes never deviating from the 'novel.' "Just heading out. The night's still young, after all."

And there's lots to do, went the unstated. She grunted at his deliberate irony and forced her features back into calm countenance. "Liar," she whispered.

"Hm," was the response, more reflexive than anything.

"You have a mission? Work already?" Not like she expected to have gotten anything out of him, anyway.

"Well," he said, standing and moderately stretching his lower back, "it's past someone's bedtime and some people have a busy day tomorrow." He thumped her on the head with the spine of his book.

"What do you know?" she commanded and braced to lunge at him, tackle him, take him down to get the information if needed. She would not let a second chance for an inside look at Tsunade-sensei's plans slip away again.

He brought the book to tap against his chin in thought and folded the free arm underneath the supporting elbow. His skyward gaze completed the innocent picture. Another tap. "Well, nothing really," he laughed.

The laughter grated her last nerve and she cracked. Her fist was bared and primed. "Kakashi-_sensei_!"

"Oops, time to go." He nimbly dodged the thrown punch and threw her a combo of cocky smile and salute with bow before tucking away _Icha Icha_.

"What happened to your hand?" she demanded with glaring eyes, troubled by the stiffness she'd seen in the motion. "You shouldn't be feeling anything more from those burns."

He gave her a blank look, blinking once and still holding his bow before glancing down at the hand in question, flexing it. "I don't."

Her eyes narrowed. "Then why does it still bother you? What did you do?"

"Oh, nothing," he said in that distant voice. "Just…put my hand through a tree is all."

Her eyes probably should have opened wider than they had. She was not terribly surprised, for whatever reason. "Training for something?"

"I'm only trying to keep on top, having fallen behind while training wayward brats and all." He was baiting her, trying to throw her inquiries off; she could see it so clearly, now.

"_Liar_," she whispered with quiet vehemence.

"Now why would you say that?" His chin declined inwards towards his chest, resulting in an extremely predatory look directed at her.

"Because keeping on top does not require a fist through a tree. And you never lose your cool. Definitely not enough for such a drastic action as that. You're trying to reach something."

He looked briefly to the pavement before suddenly smiling at her, bestowing a short joyful wave from his sustained bow. And then he was gone, laughter, book, and perverted sense of humor with him.

"Ooo! That Kakashi!" she fumed to herself. Still, best to be prepared. He may or may not have been trying to tell her something with that bump to the head at 'busy day'. Heaving a loaded sigh, she lifted her books and made her way home to read as much as possible before she passed out on her bed.

* * *

"_Don't just toss them together like that! Throw some missions at them so they can at least get used to each other. Geez," he huffed in an overdramatic sigh. "No wonder you've warded all the men away all these years. You have no sense of _romance_!"_

_Tsunade blushed furiously and threw the nearest scroll at him, not at all satisfied when it caught the back of his unguarded head. _

"_Fine then," she said haughtily, impatiently gesturing for him to hand the scroll back, eyes closed in refusal to even look at him._

_Jiraiya scowled first at the scroll then at Tsunade as he soothed away the pain with a hand at his crown. "And why should I do that? So you can reload and fire again?" he asked in reference to her angry gesture._

"_So I can write up a string of missions for them, _idiot._"_

"_Oh," he stated. His arm stretching out to her reaching hand, jerking back as she viciously snatched the scroll back in fear of a parting reparation._

"_So, _idiot_, any ideas?" She still wouldn't look at him and instead focused on inking her brush._

"_I don't care. Just anything, and a lot of it."_

"_How did this become _my_ project?" she griped, writing out meaningless upon meaningless mission agendas. _

_Jiraiya grinned devilishly. "_You're_ hokage. It's _your_ village. Do you want his power or not?"_

_She only grumbled in reply.

* * *

_

"Ah," Tsunade emitted as she glanced up from paperwork to briefly greet them. "Glad to see you two, finally. Sit, I need a few moments to finish this and then I'll debrief you."

Sakura was all too happy to oblige with that last bit and eagerly did, paying no mind to anything until the hokage called attention to it. This latest string of _ungodly_ mundane missions had been the last taxing toll on her sanity. Kakashi strolled in at his slower pace and bowed slightly to the hokage, giving a passing glace to Jiraiya in the corner before coming to stand behind Sakura's strewn position upon the plush floor pillows.

Jiraiya turned away from the motion, bringing a hand up over his mouth to mostly cover the knowing smile. Kakashi was more comfortable in- no, preferered Sakura's presence than either of theirs. Interesting what a few months of time well spent serving for the good of Konoha would do. Jiraiya wondered if Kakashi knew what his actions were saying. No matter how trivial the inference, it was _progress_, damn it. The end result had been reached, even if it was frightfully superficial; Kakashi and Sakura were certainly more comfortable with each other than before. He shot a glance at Tsunade still writing away.

Kakashi thought nothing of the look the 'eclectic' author shot the hokage nor the returning one Tsunade eventually imparted without pausing her recording. Instead, he was quite bored and while he knew the debriefing necessary, he wished she would hurry it along. Sakura threw herself to stretch backwards across the cushions and flung her arm out, finding her target. He looked down passed crossed arms at the grasp on the back of his calf to meet her upturned face, smiling behind his mask as she mouthed to him, 'I hate waiting.'

He lifted a shoulder in a half-assed shrug, nodding peripherally, 'I know.' She withdrew her arm from where it'd wrapped around his leg and rolled over in a manner that belied the foregone disgusted 'ugh' to settle on her stomach and hug a pillow. Feeling as if being watched, he lifted his gaze to the corner, but Jiraiya was looking away to Tsunade, hand over mouth and rubbing his chin. Kakashi shifted his weight to last him until the hokage was ready.

"Shizune," Tsunade suddenly said wrapping up whatever she'd been writing. The ever-present shinobi immediately stepped forth with a 'yes ma'am' to stand at attention, taking the proffered scroll. "Take this to the missions desk and close the door behind you."

There was a momentary curiously concerned look that was replaced by experienced knowledge before the woman moved to comply. Tsunade watched her aide leave and until after the resounding of the closed door before turning to Kakashi and Sakura. "Go ahead," she nodded to them.

Sakura jumped in. "Oh, Tsunade-sama, it was _so boring_! Everything went as was supposed to and not even a stupid strand of grass even so much as bent the wrong way."

Tsunade and Jiraiya smiled in spite of themselves and the genuine exasperated tedium the young woman's voice exuded. "Alright," she began almost benevolently, "I know it really doesn't merit a debriefing…or report."

Sakura all but wilted with relief, Kakashi stood unmoved, unable to care less. He did note the look the two sannin shared this time but he kept his eyebrow in check.

Returning to her two shinobi, Tsunade folded her hands before her, steeling herself for the difficultly this would undoubtedly erupt into. Oh, this wasn't going to be pretty by far. Putting her best motherly – but stern, mustn't forget stern, she reminded herself; these were her children but not – she began.

"I have something to request of you," Tsunade said somberly, looking into Sakura's eyes. The girl's reaction was evidence that she at least perceived this to be of high importance. Good.

"Think of this as a long term mission if you must, Kakashi," she directed at him pointedly, meeting his gaze in knowing that stipulation was likely the only thing to hold him to this. His brow tightened. Well, she knew this was going to go over _fan-flipping-tastically_, if that was any indication.

"For the sake and insurance of Konoha," she paused, looking first to Jiraiya and then over the two of them before inhaling, "I would like for the both of you to enter into a union of marriage."

Jiraiya held his breath, intent and anxious eyes traveling from the astounded shock on Sakura's face to the escalating raging anger of Kakashi's. His hand fisted in his pants, at mercy of the situation playing out before him.

Kakashi was in denial. That did not just happen. That did not just come out of the hokage's – Tsunade-sama's – mouth. This was not real. This was some kind of horrible, horrible genjutsu.

"What?" Sakura's wavering and gasping voice overlapped with his equally breathless and incredulous hoarse cry.

But neither Tsunade nor Jiraiya ventured forth any further information or explanation. He could feel Sakura's desperate eyes on him but couldn't bring himself look at her. So instead, he took his anger out on the hokage. "You're serious."

Tsunade gave a gracious but punctuated half nod.

"…well, fuck." It'd just escaped his lips and he hadn't realized it had until his hand was raking through his hair in pure shock. Who the hell woulda seen _that_ coming?

"I-I think I'm gonna be sick," Sakura breathed. "I'm sorry, Hokage-sama, but I-I need some time!" Even struggling to stay standing, the girl was just barely waiting for a proper dismissal from her sworn leader before bolting.

Another half-nod was bestowed. "Of course." Their mutual student flew from the room, hand over mouth and tears trailing in her wake.

Kakashi tore his eyes from the display and rounded on the godaime. "What the fuck were you _thinking_?"

"Watch your tone with me, brat," she stomped down harshly. Blinking and attempting to set aside some of her reflexive anger, she tried to push on. "Your answer?"

He stopped short, taken aback briefly that she'd just asked him that. "My answer? _No_. I will not condone this."

"I told you to think of this as a long term mission, Kakashi. Don't make me assign it as one." He knew the threat for what it was.

"So, I don't have a choice in this?" He didn't wait for the obvious answer to back up her warning. Instead, he gestured to the door through which Sakura had fled. "And what about her? You're going to force this – _me_ – upon her?" He just couldn't _believe_ this! "Explain," he waved at both Jiraiya and the hokage. "What's the whole story? Why me? Why _her_?"

The two sannin shared an uncomfortable look before Jiraiya took the initiative to relay his thoughts and their shared hopes for what they hoped would come from such a match up.

"Alright," Kakashi nodded in understanding although still upset, "I can see how this would be beneficial. But why not me and someone else? It doesn't have to be Sakura."

"Kakashi," Tsunade put in, "you know her control as intimately as I and know her reserve is something else. It takes a certain someone to be a medic-nin, after all. You're well aware of that by now."

His brow narrowed at the number of unpleasant references that statement brought forth from memories. Yes, he knew. "I can agree to this if another suitable replacement is found. I will not force this on her." He wouldn't force it on _any_one if it was _his_ choice. No one deserved the mental patchwork job he was for a spouse and definitely not as a mate.

"What makes you so sure she'll refuse?" Tsunade's own eyebrow was raised in challenge. "She's just as crippled by a deep sense of honor as you, brat. You will both perform your duty."

His stomach clenched, knowing the truth in her damnable words was scorching his throat with searing guilt and sorrow as he swallowed. He could taste the bitter acid their one predictable trait secreted in amounts sufficient enough to drown them, ensnaring them in this now inescapable track of action.

"She will be good for your clan."

He snorted cynically. "The Hatake name hasn't been good for anyone in two lifetimes."

"Then let her be good for it."

He held his tongue. He wasn't going to win this, and even if he did, he knew he wasn't going to get out of it. He glared past Tsunade to stare out the hokage's open window, his features waning slightly as thoughts and words tumbled through his mind. He moved closer to the desk, ignoring both Jiraiya and Tsunade as they drew back in his maneuvering around it to climb the sill. The window would be faster. He jumped out.

"Still a brat after all these years," Tsunade breathed in something not so much relief as it was dissolution of the situation.

"Once a brat, always a brat," Jiraiya attempted light-heartedly. "He was born and raised one, after all."

"Hm," she released noncommittally. That…could have gone better, but now she feared it might get worse. "This isn't going to be easy, Jiraiya."

He nodded, momentarily serious. "I know."

"I'd like your help with it."

He inclined his head. "You have it. I'll work on him."

"Thank you." She sighed, partly relieved that someone as close to Hatake as possible would be there to buffer. Any other emotions she held for the situation were removed; there was still work to be done. She imparted a last warning to her former teammate as he moved to leave. "Be careful with him. He's touchy, you know."

"Yeah, I know."

The door was opened and the white mane trailed from sight, her Shizune studiously watching him in passing as she entered before turning her gaze to the visibly stressed village head. She resumed her position next to Tsunade and deposited more papers and scrolls on the corner designated 'inbox.'

"Everything okay?"

Tsunade tightly shook her head and reached for the top of the new pile, brush at the ready. "Never is."

Shizune refrained from further comment with a small frown and took up her own parchment and brush, ready to resume dictation.

"Where were we?" Tsunade asked.

* * *

End Chapter 5 


	6. Chapter 6

He'd found her in one of the clearings on the edge of town. Tracking had never been a problem for him and she'd hardly ever been a challenge for her familiarity. He dropped from the treetops onto the plain and took up his slanted posture, eyeing the tree a ways in front of him. She was slumped against it, back to its far side and out of view. Stepping to the side slightly, he could just see strands of light hair and a hanging arm that every-so-often came up to expel a tuft of pasture. The prairie grass was long and covered half her forearm when the hand went back to refuel. More strands were thrown into the wind.

He walked and came around to stand before her. She was the very picture of despondence and hurt, confused with what was being asked of her. He wondered if she fully realized exactly _what_ they were asking of her. He knew he did. He was tempted to scratch at his neck but refrained, burying his hands in his pockets to combat the uneasy gesture, opting instead for nonchalance.

"Are you alright?" His voice had been quiet, even.

"I don't know what to do." Hers still trembled as more grass was offered.

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to," he said matter of fact. "_Don't_ do it at all. Don't think about it, worry about it, anything."

He saw her shoulders shudder as she inhaled. She was terribly disturbed. Hell, he was pretty shaken. Her voice was almost engulfed by a sniffle. "But Tsunade-sama asked me."

"She shouldn't have asked you." He was upset, angry. She could tell from that frigid tone.

"I can't just refuse the hokage." It was almost plaintive.

"She was wrong." He really was pissed, voice seething with that quiet burning fury. "She shouldn't have put you in this situation."

He kicked at the grass and sent a pile of ground flying a bit. That was a little harder than he'd intended… He mumbled in undertones dark with promises, "…she didn't even talk to _me_ about it first…" Well, that explained all those seemingly 'random' missions they'd been paired on for the last few months.

She finally looked up at him and he didn't at all like the resigned look he saw as her eyes met his. "This…isn't quite how I envisioned my wedding to be."

There was an attempt at a brave smile; that failed miserably. He wanted to stop it right there and dropped into a crouch, elbows on knees as he rested on the balls of his feet.

"Don't. Don't pretend," he said sternly, peering deeply at her. "It's alright to be upset. It's alright to not like it. It's alright to say no," he added the last bit gently, wanting to ease her worries. "Don't feel obligated just because it's Tsunade or Hokage asking."

"But she wouldn't ask if it weren't important," she argued softly. How could she refuse?

"Don't forget she's still a shinobi, Sakura. She's always thinking to stay several steps ahead." His gaze dropped momentarily from the intense focus he'd had on her face moments before. "It's nothing more than that. She…simply wants to maintain a measure of control by keeping certain abilities exclusive to Konoha. …And she thinks you have something meaningful to contribute to that."

"Do I?"

"Well, your chakra control _is_ impressive. It's easy to see why any ninja family would want it incorporated into their bloodline."

"You think so?"

He nodded.

"Do you think this marriage is a good idea?" she said after a pause.

She wasn't particularly hopeful but maybe fearful? Apprehensive of what he would say? He didn't know. But what he did know was this, "I don't like that you're already thinking of this in terms of agreement."

Her eyes looked almost betrayed and he sighed, having a good idea at what she was taking offense at.

"It was only a proposal." Of a very different sort than what she would have liked, assuredly. "You don't have to make a decision any time soon...or at all. And I don't want you to feel pressured."

"You agree with this? You sound like you do…" She stopped breathing. "If I agreed, would you do it?"

"No, I do not and…I don't know. If that's what you wanted…" They both knew how likely that was. "I never thought I'd get married. I've long since accepted that my clan will die with me."

"You shouldn't say that…that's depressing," she commented quietly. "Surely you have family around?" He only looked unblinkingly at her. Well, then. "Haven't you ever loved someone so much that you wanted to be with them forever? You've not once had a fantasy about marrying that one person?"

His brow rose at that.

"Marriage is only a political game, an alliance, a contract. A marriage exists outside romantic intentions, Sakura. Love has nothing to do with it." She definitely looked stricken and reeled from the hurt there. It's not as if he'd been trying to assault her dreams or something. That's just the way it was.

"Don't you believe in love, Kakashi?"

"It's not that I don't believe in it - there are many types of love - I…just don't believe it's for me. Not that kind, at least," he said, looking her in the eye. They had shifted to that more personal level again. These fluctuations were coming so inconsistently at different instigators that no pattern could be assigned to them. It unnerved him, the shifting. Their past several missions had led to some interesting conversations amid dangerously amusing situations.

"Why not?" She honestly couldn't believe that.

"I've always _been_ a shinobi. There's no room for anything else." Naturally. Potential weaknesses were to be kept _far_ at bay.

"That's nonsense."

"Is it," he said flatly. He could think of a _number_ of reasons why 'love' was detrimental to shinobi function and survival. He was prepared to list them should he be called upon.

"Yes. Just look at the Hyuuga clan - their problems aside. They're huge, even have a second branch, and you're going to tell me they got to be that way without loving one another?" She was so certain.

"I highly doubt the love you're talking about is to be found in that clan. Hinata is shunned by her own branch - her own father – because she lacks the desire and strength of all the Hyuuga before her. In her family's eyes, she's a failed heiress; they've given it to the younger sister. And Neji, born and delegated to servitude of the second lower, lesser branch, is forever doomed in protecting family 'interests', the heir or heiress. Does that sound like the love that you were thinking of?"

Quiet.

"But I'm sure there are many examples of genuine caring within the Hyuuga household," he said to her silence, not wanting to totally disillusion her. "Now, it's true not all marriages are solely for political gains. Your parents, for instance," he said scratching a finger against his cheek. "I've seen through you how much they truly care for each other."

She looked up at him and asked, not completely unaware of the compliment, "Were your parents like that?"

He blinked, finger resuming its scratching after having paused at her question.

"Well, I've no doubt that my father cared for and respected my mother, but as for loving her _romantically_…" He broke off as he thought, trying to recall any tidbit from his childhood that would help form his words. "I…don't know. I can't remember my mother very clearly."

Her brows furrowed, momentarily saddened at the thought of not knowing one's parents. "So, you don't think you'll ever fall in love?"

He shook his head slowly in time to his thoughts, speaking, "No. I don't think I'm capable of it."

"Well," she hardened, face becoming defensive in a last attempt to justify her outlook, "sometimes it's for more important reasons, like preserving skills, bloodline limits, or even for treaties that people let themselves fall for each other. Right?"

"Sakura, you're not making any sense," he lightly laughed, not getting how she'd forgotten the entire spurring of this conversation to begin with. "That's the reason behind this, you realize, although I question the falling for each other part." He was almost amused as he reminded her, a smile tugging at his lips. But the reality of that truth made him squirm in discomfort and he shuffled in his crouch again, shifting weight to the other foot and looking down. The lift to his lips turned bitter. She was so proud of her logic.

"But still, that's a diplomatic way of putting 'let's make good shinobi together.'" He felt his face warm, realizing what it was he'd just said and renewed his examination in earnest of the grass underfoot. Ah, spontaneous candid conversation.

He'd slipped.

Hmm. That couldn't be good.

"But my family isn't strong in any ninja arts at all," she said, graciously letting his comment slide. "I was just some kind of fluke. Why would they want to 'continue' what's there if this is just a one-time thing?"

"Well," he began cautiously, finger scratching at his cheek again, "it's not so much you…"

Her eyes grew so wide they froze him in place. "You? Your family has a bloodline limit, sensei?" She was incredulous and surprised, though, thankfully, she didn't take offense at the slight he hadn't meant to impart in his ambiguity.

The 'sensei' bit _stung_ horribly, reminding him just exactly how _wrong_ this entire arrangement was. They were asking him to _wed_ and fucking _procreate_ with the child he'd spent years tutoring. He was harshly informed of their actual standing once more, the illusion of being almost on close personal terms shattered into sprinkling flaking shards before him. However, it served the double purpose of allowing him to distance himself quickly, backing out of the uncomfortable long-forming almost-intimacy they were diving into. He took that opportunity.

"Not exactly," he said, tone aloof in a way it hadn't been for some time, the one he took when he'd taught them.

"Then why me? Why would they ask me? I have nothing of worth."

He cleared his throat self-consciously, thinking that going back down this line of reasoning was not such a good idea. "Your chakra," he said around it.

Her look said it all.

"Your chakra," he restated without the embarrassedly muffled growl. "Specifically, your control of it." Why was it so uncomfortable to think along the strategic lines? Oh, because they were asking him to fucking _wed and procreate with his student_…former. The thought of what would have to be done in order to accomplish that could never be far from his ever tactical mind. Just even _thinking_ about visualizing that appalled him. It wasn't the activity itself, however, and he couldn't push the neighboring anticipation away. It'd been quite some time since his last… It was just with _whom_ this particular romping would take place with that he had issue over.

He needed to pursue other venues, _now_.

"That's the second time you've said that. Is it that remarkable?"

"I'd say, if you can still put both Naruto and Sasuke to shame," he said with a much missed gleeful and trademark smile. Anything to get rid of those uncomfortable thoughts and desires, given the circumstances. "And the trait has to start somewhere, does it not? You should be proud of it."

A shy and slowly growing one answered his, unbidden. He could always make her smile, really smile.

"You going to be alright?" he gently asked.

She nodded in something reminiscent of childish motor skill and he released his breath. "Kakashi…sensei? About those exams…" she said hesitantly, fingers picking at her nails as her eyes fluttered with all kinds of new nervousness. "Would you…?"

"Come," he patted her on the shoulder knowingly. "We have some training to do, don't we?"

* * *

They tried to squeeze in as much practice time in between his missions and her hospital hours as possible. It was proving more difficult lately as each was being pulled more heavily in their own direction the last several weeks. Tsunade had significantly upped Kakashi's mission load and he'd be gone for several days at a time. It was frustrating to both for different reasons. Sakura was facing longer hours due to cramming in as much experience as possible for the upcoming test and because it being the end of 'Baby Season', as she called it. 'Baby Season' was the period that started around early spring and ended around early fall where Konoha welcomed most of its new arrivals into its heavily shinobi population. This upcoming meeting had been hastily arranged as they found they'd both have a small window open at the same time. She was running out of time and both out of freedom.

She was the first to arrive but he hadn't been far behind, appearing a short distance from her only moments after she'd paused to look around. He could tell she was weary, no doubt the hospital draining her when studying didn't.

"You up for a short spar?" That was really all they had time for, sadly. Their schedules were far too pressing and his would be the first to give today.

"Are you?" she countered lightly. He smiled ironically, though it went unseen by her. Apparently he looked as exhausted as he felt.

"I think I could conjure up sufficient energy for it," he replied, bordering on insolence. She'd already been forming seals.

It really did prove to be short, neither really into the idea of the activity at the time. So he stilled on the grass and idly watched as she sank down to lie back against a trunk. He put his hands into his pockets after a few moments for lack of anything else to do and contented himself to wait until she made the next move. He waited. And waited. He hoped she made a move soon because he had to go.

"Hey, Kakashi?" she said, quietly, looking up into the tree tops and letting her arms hang straight down to where her legs squeezed the flattened palms together.

"Hmm?"

"How come some people have a summoning scroll? Like…Naruto. How did he get his?"

"Well," he began, "there are a few methods in which one acquires one. With Naruto, Jiraiya probably had him contract on his since he holds the Frog Lord's scroll. Sometimes, they're passed down through families. And sometimes," he paused, voice dropping in his sigh to look up at the sky, "they're given as…gifts."

She'd picked up on the pause and bit into it, much as Pakkun did his leg when he ignored him. "Is…that how you got yours?"

He sighed, not wanting to discuss this, but… "Yes, that's right. Something like that." He thought he wasn't going to discuss this.

She cocked her head at him, more alert now that she was intrigued. "My family doesn't have anything like that." She was most definitely forlorn about that. He knew it most likely had to do with the fact that she grew up in a non shinobi family. Ninja artifacts and trades were hard to come by in such an environment. "Do you still think it's possible for me to come by one someday?"

"Hm. Yes. Why do you want one so badly?" He titled his head back at her, gauging her from a different angle.

She looked away, down into her lap where buried hands still lay. "I don't know," she shook her head at them. "I…just thought, 'it'd be nice to give my kids something like that,' is all."

He looked further out into the field, suddenly uncomfortable in leaving his gaze on her. "They're really not that big a deal, you know," he almost whispered. "They take a lot of chakra, lots of seals, you have to cut yourself...they get moody. Not worth it most of the time, if you ask me."

"But I didn't," she teased.

He smiled to himself and looked down to where he tapped his toes against the ground. Mentally sighing about the underlying situation, he thought. Well, it was all going to be the same eventually, right? Might as well. His left hand came up to unfasten a pocket at his breast.

"C'mere, Sakura," he said, the scroll landing in his palm with heavy purpose. He knelt and she came upon him, the tassel flinging over itself as the scroll rolled out over the grass. He withdrew a kunai from his side pouch and held out his left hand, looking up at her. "Give me your hand."

She hesitated a moment before sinking down to his level, offering her right to him. His left gripped the back of her hand and pulled it over the scroll to face palm up where he brought the kunai to it. She tried to jerk away when she saw it but he held her firm, looking her in the eye. "Don't you want a summon?"

Her eyes had shot to his in ready defense but softened at what he'd said. "Is this what I think it is?"

"My hounds? Yes."

"Pakkun?"

"Hm, yes. _Him_, too," he drawled, poking just a bit of fun at the sometimes present companion. Why those two had such an affixation on each other he didn't want to know.

Her hand went limp in his. He imagined it was due to the shock. "Why?" came the unexpected question. He just shrugged, unwilling to comment. She let it go.

"Do you want it or not?" He needed to know before he committed to this.

She nodded, answering breathlessly. "Yes, if you'll let me."

"Of course. That's why I offered." He looked to her hand once more and brought the knife to sink into the padding of her middle finger.

"I-is that really necessary?" she'd stopped him before he could break the skin.

He sighed in semi-frustration, wanting to get it over already. Tsunade was already going to yell at him for not having been on time to pick up the mission he'd been summoned for. "All contracts are made in blood."

"Alright," she nodded.

He pressed the kunai firmly to the soft skin, slicing the tip lengthwise and moderately deep. She hissed as he drew the metal through. This time she succeeded in jerking her hand away when he used his own fingers to squeeze the cut, milking more blood from it. He let her keep her now cradled appendage but addressed the wounded expression by issuing instructions.

"Spread it over your hand." She focused on the action as she rubbed all her fingers together, the blood liberally coating them. Knowing it would not be enough, he pushed her further. "Spread it farther."

She widened the radius of motion, blood now covering almost half the length of her fingers. Shaking his head, Kakashi seized her hand once more and used his other to force the palm open, wiping his own hand several times over the entirety of her palm until hers was finally fully coated in a thin layer of red. He flipped it over to face palm down, and aligning it with the proper slot, firmly pressed it against the parchment. He released his grip and left her to remove her own hand. They both watched as she carefully lifted her hand in wonderment, looking to where her small print left its mark. Kakashi removed his from the scroll altogether in having gently held it down from sticking to her when she pulled away and leaned back on his heels.

She was smiling in disbelief. This was _Kakashi's_ scroll. His famous pack of nin-dogs! Was this real? She would have denied it outright if not for the big red splotches mirroring each other on hand and paper. Her free hand lit up and she brought it to the gash on her other, mending the wound. As it closed, she let her eyes roam, taking in the newly acquired scroll and its characteristics, noticing the larger handprint next to hers. Reading the name, she looked between the print and the hands of the man across from her. They didn't match.

"Is that you?" she said, pointing as well as she could with occupied hands.

"Hmm?" He fixed her with an ignorant look before glancing to where she was attempting to point. "Ah, yes."

"How old were you there?" she glanced away to wipe the blood from her hand onto the grass. "Your hands obviously aren't that size any longer."

"Oh, sixteen or seventeen."

"Can't you remember?" She almost couldn't believe him.

"It was a long time ago." He was slightly defensive.

"Pfft, oh, please, Kakashi," she stoked, eyeing him. "As if." She really wasn't sure how old he was but it couldn't have been as long ago as he was playing at.

He began to roll the scroll back up, saying, "You can sign it another time." He fastened its binding. "I'll teach you to use it later."

"So, how exactly did you come by this scroll? You said it was a gift. You must have pleased someone greatly." She knew it had to be some outstanding deed for as rare as something like a summon scroll to just be given away.

He hesitated so very slightly as he backed it into the easy load slot of his vest, buttoning it. She didn't know if he was going to answer he was so still, so quiet. He didn't know if he should. But he could feel awareness of his surroundings fading, dulling as he mind betrayed him and regressed through painful years to even more distressing times.

"There was a girl, once," he said, sounding distant even to himself and oblivious of Sakura's peeked attention and cautious observance, "who used it to convey her last will." He paused to sigh long enough that she didn't think he'd go on. His voice was so very quiet.

"Why did she give you that, of all things?" She couldn't believe she was getting away with prying like this but she still felt tremendously guilty. She'd never seen him like this before, so remorseful. It made her heart ache.

He awoke from his momentary stupor and looked to the ground, minimally shaking his head in bewilderment. Even after all these years he still couldn't figure it out. "Who knows? People do strange things for love."

Sakura just about swallowed her tongue. Kakashi-sensei had been…in love? Why did that not seem right and why did that concept seem so wrong for seeming wrong? Could that explain his once previous comment about it 'not being for him?' It's not like she shouldn't have expected the man to feel something for another just because he never…_appeared_ to feel. She knew first hand he was human. She's seen him angry and annoyed on several, several occasions. True, it usually took a _lot_ – and she meant _a lot_ – to push him to detectable mannerisms, but she's witnessed it, nevertheless.

"She loved you."

"Yes." His voice quivered, actually quivered.

"How did you know?" She was curious in a horrifying sort of manner, wanting to know this about him but not.

"…She told me."

"Did…did you love her?" Oh, the palpable tentativeness in her voice.

"No," his voice was noticeably tighter. "Even up 'til the end…even as she lay there, I couldn't."

He'd looked quickly to his arms. It clicked in her head then that he must have been holding her as she died.

Her voice was subdued with sympathetic understanding, she identifying with both sides far too much. "What was her name?"

She could see him drawing a deep breath and the reply came out stronger than she thought it should. "Rin."

The name clicked as one she'd seen beside Kakashi's on the scroll. "Inuzaka…" she breathed out, putting it together. She thought she knew, but asked anyway. "How did you know her?"

"She…was on my team."

And then she knew. Her chest tightened, pained by the personal experience. She imagined, sadly, that it probably hadn't been all that different from her own confession to Sasuke. She could see it in hateful hindsight now how Kakashi had repeatedly called her on her pursuance of Sasuke and why; he'd been there before, been on the receiving end. And having already gone through it, he'd known how it was going to end up.

She hated herself of then, how petty and naïve and _stupid_ she'd been. Maybe if she would have taken Kakashi's advice to focus more on training than Sasuke she'd be a more notable shinobi. It was hard to say but she suspected strongly that she'd be better off in numerous other areas. But the one thing that always came back to settle the argument was 'would Sasuke.' There was never any debate on that point; he surely wouldn't be here with them today if she hadn't had the drive to go after him.

Yes, the girl she'd seen in the photo beside Team Seven's in his room – never mind why she'd been there, she still felt embarrassed enough as it was to have entered it. She must be related to Kiba, then. Sakura distantly wondered how closely. Both had the distinctive swatches on the faces, although different colors. Maybe the tint had something to do with identifying clans. Or was it 'packs' in their case? The picture painted her as a very sweet girl.

"How did she…die?"

His face twisted in bittersweet remembrance, the visible eye tightening to show profound creasing at its corners. She imagined the hidden smile to be just as sour. "A demon."

She ached for him but couldn't identify. "That was over twenty years ago, before I was born," she said softly.

A resentful laugh completed the cynical atmosphere. He was well aware of her age as it was. "I lost the rest of my family that day…"

Her eyes grew wide at the admission. "What?"

He just shook his head and stood, turning and stepping away from her. Apparently, he hadn't meant to say it and certainly hadn't directed it towards her. She stood as well but he spoke over his shoulder before she could draw closer.

"I have to go. I'll see you later." He jumped away, seemingly more rushed than usual.

Sakura gazed in the direction he took off in a moment longer; maybe she would see him. She couldn't. The Yondaime had been in that picture, Kakashi's squad leader. He had also died that day, that infamous day that Naruto had been born. Was he part of the 'family' he'd meant? Looking to her watch she cursed. She was already thirty minutes late. Still, she paused to look behind her again for him, but hurried on her own way when it proved fruitless. She would see him later. Tsunade owed her some meaningful time, she thought. She would have to pay her a visit soon.

* * *

End Chapter 6.

Not...sure on this one at all. It all sounded so cool and moving and deep and emotional or whatever when I first wrote it...but then chapters oh, 2-5 happened and it now seems out of character. Plus, it seems so short and not a damn thing has happened.

More and more, however, the true intent behind this story is becoming extremely clear; how many can see what that is, I wonder.


	7. Chapter 7

That 'soon' turned out to be a little over three weeks down the road, now, and she still hadn't gotten in to speak one on one with the hokage. She would really have to make a stronger effort to sit down with Tsunade-sama. .The hospital and preparing for the Jounin Exemption exams tied up most of her time. And she'd only gotten to see Kakashi _once_ in that entire period. It hadn't been for very long, either, as he'd just been able to communicate the seals for Tracking Fang to her. They'd gone over and practiced them a few times, but the biggest delight was when he treated her by letting her complete the circle of seals. She'd squealed all over the dog when the unexpected cloud of smoke dispersed to reveal a completely surprised little Pakkun who commented on the unusual flow in the call.

Pakkun had naturally inquired what he was needed for, directing his question to Kakashi. The little dog kept throwing gauging glances from Sakura to the other when Kakashi had told him that 'it was Sakura who summoned you, not I.' Even she could read the disbelieving look the pug's wrinkled face focused on Kakashi, to which he replied 'it's true' and she seconded with a nod. However, Pakkun was still discontent to believe them, although he didn't seem all that displeased with being seated on Sakura's lap.

He fixed Kakashi with another look, speaking, "Well, I don't smell you on her…" before starting to bend downwards in an attempt to sniff things out further.

Kakashi reacted instantly, right hand shooting out across his body to reach over to where Sakura sat beside him against a large shady tree. He connected with Pakkun's muzzle and lifted it sharply up in a motion that clearly said 'don't you dare.' Pakkun bit back reciprocally, inflicting no more damage or pain than he was taking. Kakashi then twisted his hand, rolling Pakkun with it and into the grass. He then chased the dog with his hand for a few more turns, roughing him up a little before they both let go of the other.

"Kakashi, don't be so mean to him!" He'd shot her a look at the undeserved compassion for his nin-ken, but he decided he would easily take the admonition rather than the alternative.

Pakkun rolled right side up and shook as much grass off him as he could, sitting on his haunches and fixing Kakashi's warning glare with a disdainful one of his own. His fore paws came up and attempted to readjust the dislodged Konoha headband. He tried mightily a few times before Sakura took pity on him and motioned him closer, leaning over crossed legs to pull it straight once more. Kakshi desperately hoped Sakura hadn't figured out what Pakkun was getting at, otherwise they'd both be paying for it; he was sure.

Sakura stood suddenly and both Kakashi and Pakkun followed her motion. "Whelp, boys, I've got to get back to the hospital." She bent down to give Pakkun a parting rub on the head and shot the last bit out to Kakashi. "I'll see you later." She sauntered off, both trailing her with their eyes.

"So," Pakkun drawled, feigning a scrutinizing look at his paw, "what's going on?"

It was hard to act as if he didn't know what he meant. So he gave a concise and all encompassing answer, "Nothing."

"Right," he rolled his large eyes. "Well, since I didn't smell you on her, I'll give you the benefit of my doubt. But that doesn't mean there isn't anything going on."

A sharply narrowed eye was leveled on the dog, Kakashi's voice holding warning. "What are you insinuating?"

"She could be stringing you along or you might be attempting to entice her… Maybe she's giving you blo-mmmmmpffff!" The cut-off was shortly followed by a yelp. Kakashi didn't release the dog's nose this time.

"It is nothing of the sort!" he whispered vehemently to the nin-ken, having bent close to prevent any nonexistent entity from overhearing. Leaning back, he kept Pakkun's mouth clamped shut for a bit longer, only removing his hand when the dog glared back with promises no longer empty.

"Fine, continue to deny it all you want, pup, but don't forget I've been around quite a bit longer than you've been alive." Pakkun was irritated. "The least you could do is show some respect and tell me what's going on."

Kakashi sighed, more than a little weary, and leaned fully back against the tree. To tell his pact animal or not? To tell his pact animal or not? He should probably tell him now before things either escalated or exploded. He looked to the sky and didn't let his gaze waver. "Tsunade-sama asked us – Sakura and I – to get married. To each other."

Pakkun's ears were fully perked at their highest erect point and his head tilted. "Be serious, Kakashi."

He fixed Pakkun with his eye before letting it close, head remaining glued to the trunk. "I am."

The dog looked around in deliberation for a few moments, searching for the thoughts that raced and made elusive words even more difficult to grasp onto. "…Is that a bad thing?"

Kakashi's only response was an audible sigh.

Pakkun's head leaned to the other side. "Why are you so upset over it?"

"Because this is going to complicate my life."

"As if it hasn't ever been before," he growled out snidely. "Be a man, Kakashi. Your father certainly didn't balk at starting _his_ family."

His brow drew inwards. "I'm not my father."

"No, you're not," he said in his low voice before moving in close to lay his head on Kakashi's thigh. He was trying to comfort the elite ninja in the only way it would be taken. He knew how sensitive Kakashi was over the double-edged tanto that was his father, and he certainly hadn't thought too much before throwing that comment out. But he knew Kakashi would forgive him.

Kakashi finally let his hand rest atop Pakkun's head, thumb absentmindedly caressing the rolls of fur within reach on the little face.

"So," Pakkun slurred in his relaxation, jaw moving awkwardly against Kakashi's leg, "did she really summon me?"

The hand and thumb were lifted from his face and the lack of massage made it too easy for him to open his eyes again. There was a soft rustle and then paper was shoved in front of his nose, the most recent print ready for his inspection. Pakkun gave it a deliberate sniff, nodding at the pungent and undeniable 'Sakura' odor that clung there. Blood was the strongest carrier of scent and this sample was relatively fresh, overpowering his nose, and he drew back to shake his head in trying to dilute the unmoving tang.

He recognized Kakashi's mark and signature and peered at the new addition, trying to memorize it so that he would be familiar with the new pact member should any future events require verification. "It's unsigned," he observed factually.

"Mm," he replied, rolling the scroll and pocketing it once more. "I haven't had time to have her sign it."

"Oh, come on, Kakashi," Pakkun looked at him from the side. "How long does it take to _sign_ one's name? Were you waiting until the marriage, the night of? Or perhaps not until the firstborn?"

"We've been very busy," Kakashi dead-panned.

"Ah, I see. Firstborn it is."

Kakashi abruptly stood and looked down at his summon, not amused and quite honestly a little embarrassed. Pakkun could see the lightest of blushes above the edge of that mask and he kept his laughter to a snicker at the boy's tight-lipped response. He could just see child-Kakashi standing with arms stiffly at his side and giving an unconvincing one-sided argument. Ah, those were the days.

"That's not the way it is."

"Don't be like that. You can't deny it just because remembering the sounds alone she makes turns you on."

That had been the boiling point, so to speak, and Kakashi whipped around in open flight. Man, his temper was short today. Pakkun didn't give chase and Kakashi hadn't looked back, but he threw one last rib, shouting it out across the glade.

"It's not like you've never been with a woman before, Kakashi!"

Kakashi abandoned the flight on foot and opted instead for immediate disappearance and was gone from view in a swirl of smoke and leaves. Pakkun chuckled to himself and commented to open air, "Spoiled brat."

Having gotten what he wanted, he dismissed himself, laughing it up in his own dimension until he was again called upon.

* * *

Learning and using Tracking Fang had significantly upped her earth affinity enough to combine with her enhanced wind control – courtesy of Tsunade's techniques – to meet the minimum two elemental mastery prerequisite for the rank. It had just so happened that after attaining Jounin, Sakura had started doing more theoretical chakra research. She found it to be quite interesting, really, for all the things that precise knowledge of manipulation of chakra would afford and how greatly it could benefit rehabilitation. She was most excited about what this meant for the medical world but knew that it could just as easily be turned to other means. But it was in studying the myths and legends alongside current recorded information about opening chakra pathways that gave her this profound idea.

She wondered if it would be possible…

She needed to speak with Sasuke. And if he wouldn't help her…Rock Lee... She much preferred Sasuke; he had what she was after in the most direct form, after all.

Needless to say, it took every last remaining ounce of wheedling and patience she had to get Sasuke to even agree to meet in a place of privacy. He was immediately suspicious and ruthlessly called on her past attempts to get him to go out with her. She told him to get the fuck over himself and that she needed a favor that only he could award. He'd been quiet for a few moments, most likely from the fact that she'd just spontaneously cussed him out, before mumbling his agreement 'fine, but only for a few minutes.' Then he'd hung up.

She had stared at the phone before having commenting to herself 'dick.'

So what that she still caught her breath at his looks from time to time, he hadn't gotten much better on the attitude. Still, it was best to not keep him waiting. She would need all the time she could get to work on this personal experiment and thus needed to get over there quickly. She sighed. He would not like this.

It already proved to be loads of fun when Sasuke answered the door to his gloomy mansion with mask of suspicion in place. He'd been trying to rebuild after his falling out with Itachi. It was…difficult to say that he had actually killed his brother when Itachi had undeniably _let_ him. Not the win Sasuke had been envisioning for all his youth but the one he'd most needed. He was a little less driven to extreme and despondence anymore and still remained mostly a loner, but he'd fully taken up righting the Uchiha household once more. The best place to start had been its foundations and thus work began on fixing up the manor and estates. He'd protested any help and largely still did most of the work on his own. But he was a practical ninja, if not solely stubborn, and there were times where fellow comrades would be alongside him in his endeavors.

It was easy to see how far he'd gotten in cleaning. The entry and hallway were beautifully polished and shining wood flooring and fixtures while looking off to most of the side rooms revealed tarp and dust encrusted canopies. His room was undoubtedly in likewise fashionably hospitable conditions, as was the modest – as far as Uchiha standards of old went – reception room he led her to. Tea with lush cushions; perfect!

"Ooo, look at the cushions! They look so new! Feel new, too!" She turned hers over in her hands before plopping down on it.

"I just bought them," he said tightly.

"What? Why?" She focused large eyes on him.

His head jerked to the side, cheeks flushing in embarrassment and hair quickly shifting to cover them. "I knew you were coming."

"Oh, Sasuke, you shouldn't have," she soothed him, genuinely touched. "But they are very beautiful." She caressed the one underneath her.

"It was something that had to be done, anyway," he excused stiffly before coming to sit across from her, pouring tea for each. He was never one to dawdle. "So, what is it you need?" he asked as he finished pouring his cup and set the kettle down.

Sakura put her own cup down, exhaling in satisfaction at the delicious tea, and met his ever-steely gaze. "You're not going to like it," she forewarned him and watched as his brows narrowed. "I want to observe your Sharingan."

"…"

"Don't look at me like that. I'm serious."

"_Why?_"

She looked into her cup and the ripples resonating out from the sides. Her reflection was almost clear. "It's for some research I'm doing."

"And this involves me…how? Why do you need my Sharingan?"

"I want to see its chakra pathways."

"Can't you go to Kakashi for that?"

"No." She didn't want to reveal any more than necessary. Not that she thought he would leak it out, but she wanted it to be a surprise.

"…Why not? He has one, too. And he likes you better."

She stilled, both hands beginning a telltale death-grip on the innocent porcelain cup in between them. She wasn't even going to get into the different ways that was insulting. Pushing it aside, she clarified as much as she would before getting tight-lipped. "He can't turn his off."

There was a brief moment of silence as Sasuke digested that. "Point conceded. How long is this going to take?"

"I'm not sure," she said relaxing a little. "But you needn't worry about any precious Uchiha secrets being unearthed." She was teasing him.

He only bestowed a half smirk. "Chakra pathways, you said." She nodded. "Interesting. And what is it you're looking for in the Sharingan's paths?"

"Just how it activates and disperses," she raised her chin at him. "How much chakra is needed and its application."

It was his turn to look into his cup, the little puddle at the bottom briefly reflecting his contemplative features before downing it all. "Hm. Shall we begin?"

"Thanks, Sasuke." Her smile was brilliant and he looked away, the damned flush back in his cheeks.

"Yeah, whatever."

"Alright," she began, scooting around the table to sit beside him. "Face me."

He did as she asked, turning his upper body towards her. He arm was still stretched across the tabletop, hand grasping the teacup as if it were some kind of lifeline. His eyes were all over her face as she scooted closer still. So close. His head reflexively jerked back, his ingrained antisocial mannerism desperately trying to preserve the personal bubble.

"Turn completely towards me, Sasuke. I need you closer," she corrected him.

"Sorry," he mumbled, fighting against what he'd trained so hard to make reflexive in order to let her in. His hand fell away from the forgotten teacup to land awkwardly at his side as he twisted.

"Great. Now, look at me."

He forced his eyes to stop nervously traversing her face and _tried_ to lock them onto the pair directly across from him. Damn, she was too close. He struggled against the instinct to withdraw…and just about lost when she placed a hand against his face to steady his undoubtedly jerky motions.

"Try to keep still, okay?" Her voice was soothing, hand too hot against his skin. "Try to focus on concentrating. That should make this a little easier."

He only nodded, more than a little nervous. Her proximity would interfere with the normally natural action of calling forth the Sharingan. He'd be fighting his instinct the entire time, damn it.

"Alright," she breathed, looking deeply into his eyes; too deeply. "Go ahead and activate it."

He swallowed more harshly than he would have liked and reached within himself, calling forth the anger and chakra necessary to summon it. He blinked and she was suddenly staring into twin sets of rotating tama that swirled with lazy purpose.

She exhaled. Wow, not what she'd been expecting. "Okay, Sasuke. Turn it off?" He nodded, imperceptibly if not for her hand still at his jaw. Another blink and it was gone.

Her head cocked momentarily as she asked him, "Do you always blink between transitions?"

"Yes."

"Why?" her brows drew together.

"It helps to more quickly adjust to the surroundings." His lips moved tightly in his discomfort. Sakura nodded, the reasoning making sense to her.

"Okay, turn it on again." It was done. "Now off." Her fingers gripped more firmly at the hinge of his jaw as her eyes closed, head bowed in concentration. Her eyes opened to stare half-lidded at nothing. She was in obvious thought.

"Again, please." He complied.

"Again." Once more he ran through the sequence.

Her hand lifted just off his face and he breathed in a tremendously relieved sigh. Green eyes met his before she issued another command for 'on'. Once the tama circled in front of her, the hand was replaced and light eyes sealed from sight. "Off."

The hand was removed. "On." It was replaced. "Off." She asked for several more 'offs' before her eyes opened wide. "Oh, I see. I see!"

Another brilliant and blinding grin was focused on him and he shrunk back, unsuccessful as her other hand took up residence on the other side of his face. He was pulled from his backwards lean into her approaching self; a strong, forceful, grateful, and _loving_ kiss was branded onto his forehead before air was once again between them.

"Sasuke, you're a complete _doll_. You don't know how much this means to me!" There was that luminous smile again. He could tell by her tone she meant to venture to some loud and unquestionably _crowded_ restaurant. "Come on, I'll treat you to dinner."

"There's no need to go out," he said, liking the company and companionably intimate setting. His face was a full blown furnace, he could feel it. He couldn't go out looking like he'd been severely burned. Excuses, anything to not admit that he liked the attention, he was sure she'd say if she knew of his embarrassment. "We can make something here. I have a full pantry…"

"But I'm so tired. I don't really feel like cooking." She didn't want to shoot him down when he was actually reaching out but she really didn't have any energy to afford to such labor intensive activity.

"I can cook…" he said quietly trailing off and standing.

She drained the last of her tea and stood to follow, speaking at his questioning look. "Like I'm gonna make you do it all yourself."

Knowing better than to argue with her, he just let their silence en route to the kitchen fill his empty house with friendship and caring. He was sure to soak it up, keeping it for a time when the solitude again got to be too desolate. He had a feeling his face would burn all through the night.

* * *

They had unanimously decided that a very simple dish of rice with vegetables and beef in stock would be excellent. The rice they'd already started in the cooker and she'd watched as Sasuke had carefully measured out the parts, pouring them in with usual grace and curious caution. She long ago learned that extra caution was a sign of his unease in a particular field. It stood to reason that Sasuke Uchiha was not entirely comfortable with his culinary skills and so they both took turns cutting up vegetables, each just grabbing whatever was available in the basket they'd chosen to prepare.

Sakura finished cutting the carrot and swept the pieces into her hand with the knife to dump into the roiling water. She twisted back to throw the remaining wedges in with a final double-handed dump before sweeping the peels and ends off the board into the waste can.

Sasuke sent a gauging glance over to her as he deposited his own load of daikon and snow peas. "You've been spending a lot of time with Kakashi lately, haven't you." He looked at her again as she shot her own quick peek at him.

Her eyes moved to peer from the corners of her eyes over the cuts of celery piling up at the side of the blade in hand. "Yes, kind of. Why?"

Sasuke didn't think anything of the cautious tone he detected in her voice. He looked back to the boiling pot of meat and vegetables, peering over its edge, and continued, "Has he seemed…_tired_ at all, to you?"

Her knife paused in its motion briefly before resuming, thinking about any possible hidden meanings before replying. She knew something lay within his words but she couldn't figure it out. "Why do you say that?"

Sasuke couldn't tell if she was just being coy or really had no clue. "…I wanted to know if it was just me." He heard her sigh and saw her body deflate, the kitchen utensil coming to a complete stop.

"It's not just tired," she said quietly, as if she's been contemplating it for some time, "it's like he's completely exhausted. _Completely_." An errant finger pushed a chopped bit of celery, distant eyes watching as it tumbled over itself. "I'm surprised he can stand at all these days. The chakra depletion positively radiates off him."

Sasuke's features firmed up. He removed his eyes from her to peer at the food once again. The rice had two minutes left. "I thought so. So it wasn't just me."

He moved to prepare the bowls to receive the soon to be freshly steamed rice and was aware of Sakura's hair flipping up just within his vision as she whipped her head. Her eyes glared into his back though he felt no malice. "Does it have to do with his Sharingan?"

"Hmm?" he hummed in turning briefly to her. He procured a wooden spoon from a drawer and waited for the seconds to count down so he could fluff it. "I don't think so," he said, somewhat distractedly, carefully opening the rice hatch and hanging back to let the venting steam clear.

"Although, it could be; an indirect effect of using it so much, I mean." He stuck his hand into the maker, wooden spoon wielded, and began to fluff it up.

"But…he's done that before," Sakura voiced softly, blank stare on the chopped stalks. "So why is this different?"

"Mhmhm_m_m," he shrugged to illustrate his uncertainty. "You might want to put those in," he nodded towards the celery. They were promptly dumped in.

"…Do you think…that because he's not..._blood_ related to the eye that he's having problems?"

He felt his eyes slant in sympathy at her tentative question and thinking, knowing her genuine concern and medical mind were quickly pulling out all the possible worse-case scenarios. Another shrug.

"I'm sure that has a lot to do with the majority of his fatigue…normally…" He paused, "But I'm sure the true cause lays in going full force up against a sannin. He was on medical leave for seven months after that, remember. And even after, it was all he could do to just function. He…was pretty shaky." There was a deep breath. "Sometimes I think I can _still_ see the same symptoms in him."

Sasuke cursed himself and closed his eyes as hers hardened, the once visibly forming barrier of wetness seeping back into tear ducts. That hadn't been his intention to further drive her fire. Her voice was solid, eyes bright and clear and hands fisting. He didn't know why she bothered asking since her body was telling him she'd already made up her mind.

Her lips thinned into the stern line he'd quickly learned to associate with the _business_ end of her fist. "Do you really think it's some lingering effect from Orochimaru?" He tried – valiantly, he would confess – _not_ to shudder at that name. He'd avoided saying it, even _thinking_ it, for a reason. "Do you think he's been…cursed?"

"No," he answered intuitively to her slightly panicked tone. "No," he whispered again, voice low and so full of deep emotion. "There's no way Kakashi would let the bastard get close enough for that."

Her brows drew together in compassion. There was so much underneath Sasuke these days and the slot reserved for their former teacher was especially influential for him. "You really respect him, don't you?"

Sasuke only heaved a quiet sigh and dished out the rice, setting an overfilled bowl down on the cutting board next to her hand. He turned the burner off and stirred the broth mixture once to tease the solid masses afloat. A warm and gentle hand was placed on his shoulder. Her voice, her love and caring, would kill him. "He'll speak to you again, Sasuke."

He snorted sharply in cruelly cutting disbelief. "Not without derision," he bit out.

"He's just hurt," she tried to reason. "You know how he is. It…took a lot for him to let us in." Yeah, Sasuke knew. But, damn it, there were things he'd had to do! Why couldn't Kakashi just _see_ that? "He just needs some time."

"Sakura, it's been four _years_. How much longer should I expect to wait?" His glare was harsh.

"You know how he procrastinates," her mouth quirked in a weak attempt to lighten the atmosphere.

"Yeah," he half laughed bitterly, throwing his head around in his self-loathing. He knew he should have just listened when Kakashi warned him. Fuck himself for having not. He acknowledged that he really quite was. He poured the broth into the second bowl and moved to sit at the lonely table in there. He set his things down on the table before flipping some empty crates over and stacking them so Sakura could join him. He motioned for her to sit.

She did so heavily and cradled the bowl of rice, looking into it. "Do you think he's really gone?"

Sasuke shoved a rice laden clump into his mouth and chewed alongside a shrug. He dug around with his chopsticks some more before speaking. "I don't know. Kakashi wasn't even sure."

She nodded morosely, still looking into the beautiful white rice. His features and mood sobered. This wasn't how he'd imagined spending their meal together. He reached out with his sticks and deftly stole a piece of meat floating in her broth.

"Hey!" her outraged eyes stabbed at him.

'What?' his raised eyebrows said, cheeks bunching as he chewed. She retaliated by feinting for his rice, quickly diving into his broth when he went to parry and coming away with a dripping succulent cut her self. She plopped it in with a triumphant smile and chewed with exaggerated delight.

"Soooo gooood," she overplayed while chewing.

He let slip an amused smirk and they continued their meal in better spirits, the latest gossip straight from Ino's mouth flowing from Sakura's to his ears. He wasn't one to gossip…but information was power. And he knew when to grunt in response.

It was nice to have her over tonight.

* * *

End Chapter 7. 


	8. Chapter 8

Sasuke had helped her tremendously. She didn't know how she could ever express how grateful she was for the time and effort he'd lent her. She would have to treat him out properly next time at a real restaurant with _real_ gourmet food. They would so pig out. Still, no matter how much that little experiment had advanced her theories, she still wanted to spend more time and dissect all the detailed intricacies - and surprising simplicities - behind the bloodline limit. After she felt that she knew it as well as anyone could without possessing it, then she would implement her project's final phase.

Still, she wanted to present her idea to Tsunade first, however, for any insight the older woman might have before initiating that final stage; not only on chakra manipulation itself but on Kakashi, as well. How would he react to this proposal? Favorably with a healthy amount of skepticism, or with something darker? He had given her something precious, to both him and her; she wanted to do the same for him. She…wasn't entirely sure about the circumstances surrounding his eye or how he felt about it – or anything – only knew that a generous portion of angst accompanied it.

She took another bite of her chosen breakfast item and brushed the few crumbs from the page of her book, chewing in thought over text and man. While both presented complex problems and concepts, she was understandably having more trouble trying to figure out the latter. And it was the latter that would promise to be far more disastrous if any venture went astray for the unpredictability of the subject and setting. At least with the textbook scenarios there were controlled environments in which to conduct these exercises. With Kakashi, it was complete unknowns.

Still, she munched on in further thought, she looked forward to the outcome that she was confident would unfold. Eventually, at least.

* * *

The missions had been pressing, back to back and long, but now he was home and promised two days off before the next one. It was early morning, the hokage was probably already in her office by now - although how coherent given that the sun was still trying to rise from behind the mountain – but was purposely foregone as he ran by. He _really_ didn't feel like debriefing right now. Villagers were just starting to come out from homes to begin the new day and starting to busy themselves as he flew on rooftops above them. He ignored the tug of duty on his conscience urging him to report in immediately in favor of reaching his apartment. He landed in front of the building entrance, walking through the main doors and taking the stairs three at a time to his floor.

He was _tired_.

His hand was already working on the zipper, the teeth unfolding further with every step. The door was close, hand nearing the end of the zippered line as the other poised itself on his headband.

And the missions weren't _that_ urgent.

The hand freed of the zipper quickly moved to the handle and smoothly opened the door. The discarded sandals lay behind, the start of the trail that marked his progression through the small one room living space as quickly bared feet kicked the door shut behind him. There was a swish and thump of his scroll-laden vest hitting down, his headband falling atop it, cushioned. Two chinks of the plated metal on his gloves knocking against the floor signaled the end of his trail as he continued on to collide with his bed. He fell heavily, face down and immediately buried into the ridiculously comfortable pillow. His arms came up to smash it further into place against his exhausted head. He didn't bother with undressing further.

Work could wait.

Sleep would not.

* * *

There was a buzzing – distant but annoying – and his brow furrowed in half-conscious displeasure at its increasing presence. It was when he went to bury his head further into his pillow and shake it away did he realize it as a rather – and suddenly – loud banging on his door. He grunted to himself in severe irritation before cracking an eye open. It was quickly shut as the obviously much higher sun blinded him. Idly, he was curious about the time but really didn't care either way. He was pretty damned comfortable right where he was.

But, alas, that was not going to last. The noise continued and he considered going to answer it, it really was getting quite loud. He opted not to as the warm rays of light happily held his body a limp prisoner and coaxed his mind towards dreamless dosing once more.

He jolted in place as a particularly deafening series of bangs startled him. He really had begun sleeping, and must have been deeply so as he hadn't even felt the presence to his door; that was unusual. Sighing to himself, he pushed heavily off the warm bed, shuffling across the room and over discarded items to place a hand roughly on the handle. It took some effort to command his arm to pull the barrier inward enough to confront the person on the other side. And now being slightly more alert and this close to the source…it really hadn't been all that loud, just a normal knock. He was more tired than he'd thought.

A first peek showed no one to be on the other side. Looking to either side of the small opening, he widened the entrance to his apartment, stepping into the doorway and peering down either side of the hallway and throwing a cautionary look upwards as well. Nothing was there but save a little parchment envelope adorned with a black abstracted Konoha leaf at his feet.

His previously closed left eye opened to join the other in a wary disturbed countenance directed at the folded parchment just on the verge of brushing his toes. His brows drew further together as he bent to pick it up between assured fingers, those on his left pushing unbound hair that had flopped over out of his eyes. Another parting look at all angles of his door was slyly bestowed before he once again refocused on the damned piece of paper between suddenly sweaty fingertips.

An ANBU request.

He shut the door once more and broke the seal, unfolding the tripled-over communiqué. He sighed, disgusted and exhausted with it all. There was a flash of seals and puff of breath from his clothed lips before the message fell as ashes into Mr. Ukki's pot. He glanced once more out the window to more accurately gauge the time before dropping again upon the cooling mattress. He still had some time.

* * *

Needless to say, Sakura was more than a little disappointed and upset when Tsunade had told her Kakashi was out of town. She had so been hoping to get some more information from him. Although granted, she didn't know how she was going to go about accomplishing that little task of impossibility, especially along the lines of what she'd been meaning to ask him. She wondered if she would have been vague and clever enough to have worded her inquiries in the necessary manner with which to receive the sought after responses.

But seeing that he wasn't in the village again… She frowned, deeply, and earned a smaller version from Tsunade for her displeasure.

"I'm sorry, Sakura," Tsunade said in genuine empathy, "but he's away on a mission. There's nothing I can do about that right now." She really couldn't. There were times when ANBU took precedence and this time she felt compelled to act on Ibiki Morino's concerns in favor of erring on the side of caution.

Sakura's eyes fell to some point along the floor and the hokage's desk. "I know," she began, moving to look at her hands in her lap. "I was just hoping to spend some time with him…talk with him for a bit. I had some questions…"

"Oh?" her teacher's eyebrow rose. "About what, might I ask?"

She looked off to the side, trying to decide if she should discuss this with her now or not; get all her concerns addressed here or wait until talking with Kakashi, or how much she should reveal. Well, maybe now wasn't such a bad time to iron this out at all. With her subject of inquiry gone, there was little chance he'd somehow find out about it before she was ready to implement it. Hmm, yes.

"Tsunade-sensei," she said firmly, wanting to encourage this conversation but not attempting to come out overbearing, "about that experiment I've been researching. I was wondering if you would help me on a few areas I'm concerned about."

Their leader's other brow rose to join its sister, the hokage both intrigued and more than a little wary. Her student had this special talent of conjuring up some impressively - and oppressively – daunting, intensive, and boggling concepts.

"What's on your mind?"

* * *

It was something Tsunade was both in awe and a bit frightened of. The _novel_ idea that a bloodline talent could even be dissected and limited in such a way was…quite fantastical. She'd found it such a difficult concept to be executed seriously and fired some in-depth and grueling questions at Sakura, testing and probing for weaknesses, holes, the unconsidered, anything she could think of. Her student had an answer for everything; acceptable answers, at that.

This might really work. For once since returning to this village, the distraction she'd allowed their apprenticeship to provide for the both of them had produced the most stimulating medical experiment yet. She was _excited_ about this. Sakura - her dear, dear sweet student – had just jump-started her mind back to her genin years of study with her ever increasing and sharpening intellect. She would help her student in every way possible in this. There were just too many benefits to be reaped from her precious understudy's project.

She promised Sakura she would do what she could and arrange for as much time off for Kakashi as she needed. Although, she forewarned the girl, she couldn't halt Kakashi's missions altogether. That would just put him on further edge and possibly make him completely uncooperative. She would, however, scale them back considerably. Making a mental note, she reminded herself to request this of ANBU, as well. That shouldn't be left to hindsight again, especially as Sakura had come in so depressed at finding him away again on one of their assignments. Not that she'd told Sakura as much…

…But still.

Yes. This warranted much effort and promised such _fruitful_ results. In more ways than one, too, if her student caught her mental drift.

* * *

True to her word, Tsunade had discreetly made scarce missions that normally appealed to Kakashi. They both had a feeling he suspected the hokage of something, but for whatever reason he was taking the slower pace seemingly well. She couldn't quite figure out why. He did seem more at ease now than he had prior to that. However – and this still bothered her more than she had yet to voice – he still wasn't as rested as he should be, still seemed so _tired_ all of the time. She supposed that's why this latest habit had come to be about. But she couldn't label it lazy or fault him for it as she was quite concerned about his energy lately. So instead, she let it be and put up with it. Besides…it…really wasn't all that unpleasant.

Sakura and Kakashi had started this unintentional tradition of meeting often in the meadows outside Konoha where they would both lay out under a tree, or sometimes in it if Kakashi had beaten her there. It was something that had just…kind of…well, developed and they'd both decided to keep up with it. This was, of course, in the decreasingly rare occasions – thankfully – when they both had time to spare. She…really liked those times... a lot.

It was strange that such a simple thing as spending a few moments together gave them such respite from what they felt was swallowing them whole. She believed that Kakashi benefited from this to a much greater extent than she herself, and that was the majority of the reason why she kept following up on it. There were other reasons that could probably compete with her desire to see him healthy, the two more heavy gains being her getting to know him on a more personal level – even though nothing much is ever revealed and _one_ of them is almost always out of it – and just adjusting to the other on a more physical level.

It is true that there is a certain degree of physical contact when sparring or training - it's necessary for total comprehension of techniques – but this was _different_, something not completely platonic but no longer made of their previously established relationship. Occasional teasing and play presented itself, but most of it was quiet indulgence of the other's presence, neither doing more than just spending _time_ with the other. Her most favorite occasions were the intellectual debates they'd have, discussing recent discoveries in the medical field or some new-found tactical strategy, a particularly good game of shogi – never played between each other - or the advantages of kunai over senbon. When they did talk, it was about anything, nothing…rarely everything. But that was when they did.

It was funny that way, this situation. At this point in time, they were back to where they'd started, hardly speaking at all in these encounters. In the beginning, it was due to sheer discomfort in being before the other for the terms they were now so suddenly thrust upon. Then, it slowly evolved into an aching familiarity when they remembered what it'd been like _before_. It was at that stage, she thinks, where she became his pillow for nap time; comfortable to touch in the most platonic of ways and in very limited circumstances. She had always had something against that damned book but had been embarrassedly non-forthcoming with admonishments when he'd bring it out to read while lying back upon her. That he had the nerve to read graphic _smut_ when they were in the situation they were…! Ooo!

This time it was no different and _Icha Icha_'s time out was as short lived as ever, the book laying face down against him where it'd fallen, head lolled to the side and eyes sleepily closed.

He was resting in her lap as she played with his hair, raking her fingers slowly through it. He'd removed his headband in order to give her better access, his hand had fallen heavily to his chest taking his book with it, his clutch on the band loosening in his other hand as he relaxed. He would have to remember to recover it from the long grasses lest he lose it. It had almost too willingly become habit to let her comb him into such deep relaxation via his wayward hair. He had protested in the beginning at such treatment of his hair, but Sakura had blamed it on being bored and compensation of him using her as a pillow. He'd deemed it a fair price for the quality of sleep he received and let her be. Besides…it…really wasn't all that unpleasant.

He's drifting away far too quickly anymore in these encounters. He felt he should care and almost motivated himself enough to but the combing action combined with the quiet surroundings was too much of a dampener on his normal worries. He was far too comfortable reclined on Sakura's lap to do anything but give in to the lulling whisper of promises from sweet gentle fingers.

This was not the first time this has happened. Somehow, she always convinces him to come out here and do absolutely nothing. He thinks it's her way of scamming him into a good cycle of rest rather than the shit he only seems to accumulate at home. Why does he always let her do this to him? Did she really worry so much about him? Did he really look that bad to warrant such treatment? However, it seemed some damned good sleep was not on the agenda today as she gently broke the usual tranquility with a brush of fingers against his forehead and soft words.

"Hey, Kakashi," he grunted softly in acknowledgement, "have you ever thought about turning off the Sharingan?" Her pause was heavy, weighted and unsure. "Have you ever wondered if you ever could?"

His eyes slowly opened and they flicked up to meet hers. The inclusion of the Sharingan intentional and he was fairly sure it didn't go unnoticed. Was she serious about asking that? If he could, he would have long ago. But her gaze didn't waver from his and she was looking between both eyes. She was up to something. The slight frown placed itself upon his lips.

She'd stopped those fingers.

"Would you like to try?" she whispered, looking into his eyes. He pushed up and twisted to look at her, brows drawing together. What?

"I think I know how," she'd continued so very softly, taking in his sleepy yet alert appearance as sharp eyes pinned her from beneath tussled hair – courtesy of her very own fingers. It was…almost adorable and definitely exciting - in a _very_ strange way – how he looked slightly boyish in that moment but so _dangerous_. One misstep of her tongue and he could pounce faster than she could follow. She'd seen it in action before… But this was Kakashi-sensei and she was Sakura. He wouldn't. She was sure; maybe turn and run, trying to avoid it, but not act aggressively to her.

Her hand moved and was placed at the side of his face and he jumped at the contact, eyes returning to her face after wandering in thought. Her thumb brushed over his cheek. "Let's at least try. It might take more than once, but I…I think I can do it."

Her face was so earnest, tone so strong but soft. She was trying to tread carefully around him about it, about this-- whatever it was that she'd obviously been thinking so much on.

"Kakashi?" she whispered again, moving against his face again in gentle prodding. That tone…so out of place on her, so mature, so…

She was honest, too honest for him and it was times like these where he was reminded he would end up corrupting her. He half-nodded to the side in indifference…or maybe he'd just been trying to dislodge her hand.

Maybe.

But…

Why not?

He nodded again, properly this time and turned fully to face her, legs crossed with _Icha Icha_ and his headband in his lap. "What do you want me to do?"

Her lips tugged down at their corners at his tone. He was distancing himself already. Obviously, he didn't expect much from this little exercise. She'd just have to show him otherwise. She shook her head and brought her hand to his chin, correcting the tilt of his head so that he was looking directly at her. "Nothing, just keep your Sharingan open."

She felt his jaw tense in his sigh. He really didn't believe. She couldn't stop her brows from drawing together in anger at his lack of faith and instead jumped right into concentrating as she dived into his chakra pathways.

"Relax," she commanded, feeling him immediately clamp down his defenses at the invasion. "I need to find the abnormal flow."

It was hard for him but he was finally able to obey her command. Not fully, but well enough. She knew he was trying to remain open – _vulnerable_ – and she tracked his progression through the stages of tightness in his jaw. He was _trying_ to be the perfect patient and remain still but it just wasn't working for him. He didn't like being scrutinized in this manner! He was trying to distract himself as she worked – _invaded_ – within his system when a jolt harshly knocked up his senses.

Suddenly, something _shifted_ and his eyes shot to her now-open ones. For a moment, he lost the super-sharp intensity of the Sharingan and her light eyes were clear in a whole new way for just an instant before the world glossed over with a light red haze once more. The breath he hadn't known he'd caught broke free again as his wide eyes continued to look into hers.

She pulled back, the frown evident and very prominent as she gave a frustrated sigh. "Damn it. That's not right. Something's wrong."

She reached forward to begin again but he jerked back out of reach, the action reflexive but he went with it anyway, rolling into its convenient excuse to stand up. He reached down and picked up _Icha Icha_, quickly pocketing it before bending again, hand wrapping around the metal of his headband and hauling it up to where speedy fingers rapidly fastened it around his head. It was promptly pulled into its rightful place covering his eye. He didn't look at her, instead turning his back and peeking over his shoulder at her from his blind side. In actuality, he couldn't see her at all, but his other senses informed him of her unmoving location.

She could taste his flight instinct pumping into overdrive as soon as he jerked out of reach, she following with her eyes as he'd hastily stood. And in watching the marker of allegiance cover her objective, knew his retreat was not to be reversed; he was done. But still she couldn't give up. She'd been close!

"Let me try again! I almost had it!" she pleaded. "I know I can do it, Kakashi-sensei." Her voice turned pensive and she whispered her troubled thoughts. "It worked on Sasuke…"

He turned away from her briefly pondering his own thoughts before speaking over his shoulder again. "No, it's alright. We'll try again another time. There are things I need to do." Yet he didn't move.

She nodded, having expected the rebuttal but still not happy about it. She'd been so _close_! "Yeah, okay. I…should probably get back to the hospital, as well." She stood and brushed off her lap, little pieces of grass and Kakashi-colored hair floating away lightly on the air. She waved over her own shoulder as she made her way back to town. "…I'll see you later."

A burdened sigh burst from his lungs after he felt her presence fade. Only then did he feel confident enough to turn and look after her. His left hand wandered up to his face, the fingers brushing against the embedded leaf in the metal over his eye. It hadn't worked, whatever it was she'd been trying to do. It hadn't worked. But for a second – for a moment – the world had looked _normal_. His fingers curled away from the headband to drop into a fist at his side. With another glance to her direction, he began moving in his own, thinking all the while.

She had failed, but now something inside was _different_.

He didn't want to squash the hope he saw in her eyes…didn't want to kill the sprout she'd sneakily planted in him with that letdown. He would keep his promise and let her try again. Something _had_ _changed_.

* * *

She had questions – as always – but things were piling on much too slowly and the tension and frustration that had coiled within her was quickly approaching the point of release. Namely, the lack of information regarding her husband to be. She could feel all the negative energy and feelings that fed it steadily forcing it to spring, breaking out of her hard-won patience and lashing out at the person – and maybe persons, as Jiraiya crossed her thoughts – whom she viewed as responsible for all this, for holding knowledge of Kakashi from her. Kakashi had long ago made it clear that he would reveal nothing about himself and she had taken it upon herself with renewed vigor and a little anger – okay, not so little anger as of late – to uncover what she could. Obviously, this meant from others. Much to her frustration, all of her dubbed 'reliable' sources were very unforthcoming with that which she desired. So it was with much annoyance and irritation that she decided to call out some you-owe-me's on her teacher and the hokage.

Tsunade gave the girl across from her a contemplative stare, considering all the pros and cons. 'The pros…' she half-thought. It looked like they clearly outweighed the cons. She could handle a displeased Copy Nin but she couldn't deal with a dead bloodline, not like that. The need to push them close on as many levels as possible to ensure the deepest level of success was of far greater importance than the unsociable tendencies of one man.

"Sakura, would you look at these for me?" Tsunade asked after having momentarily gotten up to go retrieve it from the nearby shelf. It's not that she hadn't expected this day to eventually arrive, but her preparations were decidedly….uh, not quite ready yet. Hopefully, this would pacify the girl a bit until she could come up with more satiable material. At the least, this would be a small, if not quite so gentle, introduction into the dark shadows of one of the world's best known ninja.

She blinked in surprise, the random request catching her off guard. "Sure," she said haltingly and reached forward to take the offered file with both hands. It was very…large.

"Tell me your medical opinion on them." She sat heavily and went back to scribbling. Please let this work.

"When should I get back to you about them?" she blinked again, serious.

"Oh, you can look at them right here. Just make your self comfortable on the cushions there," she pointed with the brush across the room to the pile a ways before her desk.

Sakura looked behind her and scooted over to them, arranging her legs in a crossed position to best provide a tabletop. Flipping the file open revealed a photograph, crisp black and white staring starkly back at her. She peered under it only to find another picture, and under that yet another. Her fingers separated several prints before she came to a conclusion, "These are all photos?"

Looking up revealed Tsunade to be nodding. She looked down at all that was before her, not knowing where to start. Her hand turned the first to face right-side up. It was a man, a ninja, flat on his back, face obscured by dark cloth with the exception of the eyes which were locked in wide-eyed horrified shock. Even that was barely in the image as the focus was on the man's chest. Her eyes were all over the torso pictured, jumping from edge to edge of the round abyss blasted through the body. Some places were cauterized while others clearly were not. She could see half of one lung and where the other should have been; the liver with a large chunk missing; the cleanly severed and missing lower sternum with the upper half still intact, the few ribs still anchored there; the aorta and ventral vein, heart missing; congealed blood over what was grass and a gap in vertebrae.

She gasped softly as it all hit her. She flipped to the next picture. Same thing, one body with a similar injury, definitely a different ninja by hair and dress, flipped on his stomach. The hole was hard to miss. The next one had several bodies all in various strewn-about positions – she could tell some landed more softly than others from the position of limbs – and all obviously _dead_. The next few were close-ups of some of the ninja laying there. There were slashed on their necks, all almost in the exact same place, but so smooth and small and just so magnificently and frighteningly professional that her heart was starting to race and her breath hitch-

"Candidly, Sakura."

Tsunade's voice and authoritative expression broke the excited and fearful awe. "The efficiency with which this was done is— one stroke each, _maybe_ two— I just can't believe— This must have been done so quickly and by one person judging by radius of bodies…"

She met Tsunade's unreadable eyes. "This is one… the ninja that did this is _incredible_." The photos dragged her eyes back to them and she eagerly scoured the amazing handy work repeatedly, filing it away.

Tsunade simply watched her student absorb all she could of the evidence, debating whether to tell her or how much to tell her. She was hoping this would serve as a bridge to help her understand the other better but was unsure if this would be in favor of her case or not. She knew somewhat of how the younger woman thought of the man but didn't want to ruin any positive impressions she already held. "That's Kakashi's work."

Large eyes met her own at the statement, the girl's voice strangely monotone. "Really? He did all this? Figures." There was just a bit of a smile as she looked once again to the prints. "Looks like his precision."

Tsunade cocked her head. That had not been what she'd expected at all. Hmm. She didn't think this was going to be that hard after all.

Sakura wondered – a _lot_ – about many things surrounding this encounter. What was the meaning of it? Did it have one? Was Tsunade trying to gauge her reaction? Looking for a certain one? What were these photographs of? Did she want to know? Did she really want to know? Glancing up to her teacher and thinking on the surprising turn-a-bout of the file in her hand, it appeared Tsunade was in a rare conversational mood. She had so many questions. Where to start?

There was a pressing one that had to be asked. She needed to understand him on the most basic and familiar level. It would be best to ground her image sculpting on something she herself was equally as comfortable with – or as much as she could be, at least.

"What kind of ninja _is_ Kakashi-sensei, anyway?" she said flipping through more photos, absorbing as much as she could and reaffirming that which she'd seen in the prints. "I mean… well," she paused but still looking at a photograph, "he always seems to be so _busy_, away on missions all the time."

"Mm," Tsunade nodded, chin resting upon propped and lightly clasped hands that formed a small platform. "He's the best shinobi Konoha has."

Sakura let the picture in hand fall away as she raised her head to meet her mentor's eyes. There had been no indication of anything but the utmost seriousness in her tone. Her brow creased. She shot a quick glance to the photo between her fingers.

"He's one of the best shinobi I've ever known," she continued quietly, unprompted, once again looking at the work piled on her desk. "To date, he's completed fifty-two D-rank, thirty-one C-rank, twenty-six B-rank, forty-eight A-rank, and thirty-nine S-rank missions."

"S-rank?" Sakura voiced reverently before her mind exploded with the documented completion record. "_Thirty-nine_? Kakashi-sensei?"

Her eyes scurried aimlessly around in frenzied thought. "But isn't S-rank reserved for ANBU?"

Tsunade nodded patiently, slightly amused at her student's incredulity.

"Then he's _ANBU_?" The photo fell back atop the pile at another confirming nod and Sakura subjected a thumb nail to her teeth; all this time, all those missions…all their bitching. She would have to give him more credit and pay more attention in the next training sessions because he obviously knew so much more than what he was saying when he spoke down to her. "Is it possible I can see his mission files?"

Tsunade's small smile broadened. "Of course."

Sakura's eyes took on a slant and she threw a sly look at Tsunade. "Can I see his ANBU files?"

Tsunade's grin turned absolutely predatory. "You don't have the _clearance_ to see his ANBU file."

She released a minute tantrum-like gesture, jerking her body in the brief fit. Damn.

"Then we haven't even begun to see what he can do, huh?" she questioned her teacher rhetorically. Her regret at not seeing Kakashi in unhindered action must have carried into her voice because Tsunade all but split to a point where she was beside herself in thought.

"Damn it," Sakura emitted quietly, visions of his fluid motion in battles past flashing through her mind. "I bet that's a sight. I bet he's beautiful…"

She blinked at her student; a most wonderful idea had just crossed her mind. The ANBU recertification exhibition was coming up and Kakashi was on the roster this year. Sakura may not have the clearance for the files, but…

"Sakura, how would you like to attend a special review?" She could probably pull some strings to get Sakura listed as an active medic at the function. She _was_ the hokage.

* * *


	9. Chapter 9

* * *

The dull calls of the selectively _small_ crowd in the audience chamber of the arena reached his sensitive ears even here as a fervent murmur. He looked down as he pulled his gloves tighter, momentarily shifting the sheathed sword in one hand to better grip the leather. The strap was taut against his wrist and he moved to do the same with the other, the blade transferred to a quick hold between teeth as the remaining glove proved to be stubborn. Assured that his hand-wear was properly secured, he double-checked the guards on his arms then pulled once more at the long sleeves of the gloves. Just in case. The grip on the blade was precarious enough with the mask but it worked for the time he needed. Releasing the weapon, he straightened the cloth, pushing it farther up the bridge of his nose before twisting his body to properly position the sword at the small of his back.

He checked all his weapons and tools one last time, the messenger's approach audible to heightened senses. The characteristic white mask was pulled down into place.

"Kakashi-senpai, we are ready for you now."

He only tilted his head at the page that bowed and departed knowing his subject wouldn't be far behind. The walk up the tunnel was taken in quite a bit less stride than he would normally display. This was a very serious evaluation. And while he wasn't letting it get to him – he never did – he knew that his opponents should be given their due respect. This would be no walk in the park. The light was blaring in through the cracks in the gate, flowing as he pushed on one door before both were drawn back at his pressure. He'd beaten the guards at opening them. Oh well. It's not as if he were the Hokage or something. No harm done.

He didn't even bother to glance up into the high-walled stands, only proceeded forward to where the proctor stood near center field. A nod and half smile were given him and he nodded in return before turning to face the Hokage. Bowing, he moved to face the row of three ninja before him, the only such visible opponents of this exam. The proctor made a hasty retreat as the subject and opposing ninja bowed to each other.

He lunged forward, kunai suddenly bared, instantly meeting an opposing ninja's throat. All three were shocked. Faster than even they'd been prepared for! The remaining two scattered.

The fight was on.

* * *

Sakura grimaced at the incredibly fast killing blow. She knew the ninja wasn't seriously injured – most likely – but it had been so swift, so brutal. Tsunade-sensei had explained to her before the match as they sat waiting that while _very_ severe injuries were common here – that was the stipulation in getting her student in, for her top medical skills and the extraordinary battle experience it would expose her to – at this level of combat, everything was carefully arranged in terms of exchange. If the target was hit at any lethal point, the scrolls held on each person would absorb the damage and the person was forced to disengage immediately. This was usually done in some form of death animation, occasionally with great flair - Tsunade had spoken drolly - from the overly bored ANBU members. Apparently, it was meant as a message to the test subject, a personal jibe. All in good fun, of course.

She somehow knew Kakashi to be rolling his eyes behind that mask. For now, though, she watched as he gave chase after the two remaining ninja, he content to let them lead him on a bit. But she knew him, knew Kakashi-sensei was always planning steps in his head, setting up that mental trap and waiting for the right time to execute.

A sudden cloud of earth and dust filled the west end of the arena. There was a small inhalation at the disturbance and it carried throughout the air. No one had seen what had taken place, but everyone saw that only one of the two 'enemy' nin emerged. Kakashi-sensei was nowhere in sight. The fleeing ninja only spared a quick glance behind him before executing a quick about-face to stand ready before the cloud, kunai held at the ready. He couldn't detect his target; such was made obvious by the slight jerks of his head all around him as he searched for that one little clue to tell him of his target's whereabouts.

The dust was beginning to dissipate and the exam-ninja whipped out a scroll from his belt, hurriedly flashing through seals in order to instigate his tactic. He was jerked so harshly Sakura winced at the pain surely going through the man's neck at his unexpected downward haul. She recognized the move immediately. It was one of Kakashi-sensei's favorites. The man's technique was now void as he laid buried in the ground, white mask and shock of hair the only things still visible of the opponent.

Kakashi burst from the ground from his own exit and came to stand before his captive. He wasted no time in flashing his own seals for the take-out. But to everyone's surprise – Sakura really had to respect that buried ninja now – the imprisoned man slipped from the hold, clone disappearing and flipped away from the other man just as an onslaught of senbon and kunai railed down on the Copy-Nin. Kakashi broke his casting and slammed his fist into the ground. A large chunk of the earth rose into the air between his body and the rain of steel, the majority of the weapons solidly embedding into the mass while others overshot.

Sakura's and Tsunade's mouths dropped open in incredulous rage. "He stole my move!" Sakura shrieked.

"Hey!" Tsunade retorted, fixing her student with their identical glare. "It was my technique first!"

"He can't do that! Oooo!" they both fumed.

* * *

The earthen shield fell with a crash and Kakashi briefly looked after the once-more fleeing quarry before making a decision and turning to engage the three new enemies that had appeared after the deluge of personal arsenals. He ran at them, quickly completing his sequence to bring three clones beside him. Two split off and two kept going. Every self-image smirked as the three before him backed away from each other in attempts to separate his clones, two in one direction and one in another.

That wouldn't work.

The single ninja was instantaneously felled, the hidden clone delivering a speedy stab to his spine as one of the visibly charging clones veered off, charging back down the other direction of the field after his previous target. The confusion of a visible and non switching off had cost them an ally and valuable ground. The three remaining clones swooped around the two left standing. One prepared a fireball and the other two engaged them in melee, kunai and a katana chiming loudly across the arena.

Each swing was parried by the enemy, his heavy fireball negated with a powerful water jutsu. He was aware of that fourth ninja trying to come up behind him – though he still remained at quite a long range. The unmistakable draw of chakra building at his back was the sign he needed and he moved. He sent the fourth clone into action, it appearing directly behind his previously 'escaped' opponent to hug him from behind, pinning his arms and preventing any further seals from being formed. Letting his hold on the enemy be broken, he used the momentum from having his arms thrown up to let his kunai slide across the enemy's throat. His scream turned gurgle was all the opening he needed to dispose of the two left standing before him.

With two quick simultaneous attacks, he first took out one then the other, strong taijutsu used to break their defenses. Lethal blows landed with fist, foot, and blade removed them from the course. One body fell to the arena floor, joined by the thump of a decently sized log. Substitution, huh? He spun around to see the other ninja literally dragging himself along the floor towards the shelter of the trees on the far side. A hand was over his leg in poor attempt to staunch the bleeding of the kunai wound delivered by his clone. Kakashi flashed out of sight only to appear before the ninja, right into a trap amongst the shadows of the branches.

A series of back-flips delivers him safely from the net of rope and steel-wire. He twists to avoid the waves of kunai and stars and comes to land on a branch a good distance away. He takes a deeper breath to calm himself and regain a focused mind, kunai held ready and senses sweeping all around him. Besides the obvious opponent in front of him, he could detect two along the wall to his left, one off to his right and slightly behind, and two more directly behind. There was a small chakra flare further behind that was squandered, leaving him unable to gather further information from it. That particular unknown would have to be dealt with. First, though, he was surrounded. That needed to be taken care of first.

He infused minimal chakra to his legs and pushed off the branch and straight into the treetops. Connecting with another branch, he launched sideways to collide with the arena wall. Using the cover of trees, he padded his feet and ran along the wall towards what was once behind him and the faded flare. He was suppressing his own chakra but the ninja that had originally lured him to the net-trap was already tailing him, leg hastily patched up. And as he passed them, the others joined in as well, all jumping up and fastening to the wall to give chase.

There was a break ahead in the small foliage within the arena and his eyes narrowed at the visage contained within the clearing: a summoning party. It only consisted of three ninja but he couldn't let them get that summon off. Reaching into his rear pouch, he procured two tagged kunai and readied them between his fingers. He threw a look behind to check. His pursuers were gaining. Hastening, he continued onward, running the length of the wall. Their eyes made contact - the summoners' and his - as he was directly above them. They did not stop their beckoning. Good. They would be unable to dodge.

His kunai landed in the middle of their diagram. They were unable to back away fast enough and were caught in the blast, thrown up in the explosion. He continued to run on the wall, two of those tailing him still in pursuit, one dropping off as they rounded the southern bend. The lone ninja was headed in the same general direction but veering sharply east. Kakashi watched him closely, noticing the enemy flashing seals as he ran. The ninja came to a point further up the way as Kakashi approached, neither slowing. His eyes widened as the grounded ninja suddenly stopped, hands forming a triangle and aiming it at the wall where his next steps would take him. His pursuers were no longer behind him, but were instead emphatically vacating the area to avoid friendly fire and slid and flipped off the wall.

Shot after shot continuously pounded into the wall, shaking it considerably and forcing him to devote more chakra to maintain his footing. But that wasn't all. The stream of bulleting fire was moving in his direction. He boosted his speed, intending to either go above or below the line of fire. But he skidded to a frenzied stop as the previously trailing ninja joined in, adding in their lines to adequately cut off that means of escape. He instantly reversed and ran the other way.

A quick look to the south end showed one of summoning party to still be down, likely to be dazed for a considerable amount of time longer. Another was slowly picking himself up while the third reached the group now firing on him. A fourth spewing chain-of-fire now came at him from in front, holding him there, both sides closing rapidly in. It was either up or down now. Not wanting to take the chance of being caught helpless in the air, he went down. It was taking all his speed to just stay ahead of the onslaught of the conflagration and the ground was coming up fast. His hands went into motion, his feet rushing him towards and finally straight onto the ground. He dove into the earth.

He could hear the ever-distancing quaking of the emblazoned bullets slamming into the ground as he let his jutsu carry him.

* * *

Sakura gasped at Kakashi's abrupt disappearance. She knew he would travel beneath the soil only to emerge at another spot, but he had been going so fast coming off the wall like that. It had been such a sudden dive. She knew to expect some superior high-end combat here but this was just blowing her mind. To think that not only Kakashi-sensei but several others were at this level was _amazing_. And the fight had just started! She didn't have any idea how long these things – these ANBU examinations – ran, but she had fought Kakashi before and knew he had a long way to go before he ran out of steam.

Really, it was exhausting to just watch. She could feel her heart seizing at the daring moves, caught herself clutching at the unreachable nuisance within her chest, and mentally tallying every occurrence where she consciously slowed her frenzied breathing. Any much longer and she'd need medical attention herself.

But still…it was all so very worth it.

She was filling in more gaps of the man she didn't know.

* * *

He could hear every little thump of their footsteps, chakra their own and his directing the sounds through the earth to his ears. They were spreading out, not quite in any formation, but enough to keep them from being grouped up which could result in an easy takeout. He loosed his remaining three kunai - two grasped in one and one reserved for defense - and prepared for exit.

The two ninja he came up in between radiated shock, the smarter of the two scurrying backwards to avoid any incoming strikes while the second only stared in stunned bewilderment. It was he that would become his first victim of this new round and he let fly the two chakra laden kunai of the one hand. The force of the throw wasn't much without the chakra, but the chakra carried the unmoving ninja across the short distance to the arena wall where the steel weapons embedded into the cement, pinning the ninja against it. A quick execution of seals followed by a slashing motion in his direction rendered the enemy ineffectual as he was knocked unconscious by a ranged wind jutsu impacting his windpipe. The man disappeared as the scroll absorbed the damage and removed him from the arena.

The other more seasoned operative had recovered and was initiating his attack, quickly strafing to either side of him in the hopes to get in close for a lethal blow. He swung his arm up swiftly to bring both hands on the remaining kunai in catching the blade of his assailant's strong swing, leg thrown behind him to better distribute the incoming stress. His limbs shook, muscles reverberating from absorbing the energy of the blocked attack, locked in a momentary inertia. Kunai were _not_ meant to stop swords.

The other ninja had the greater advantage; they both knew it.

And he pressed it. More pressure was applied to the halted downward swing of the sword and he struggled against it, fought to redirect it away from his body. He did not have the leverage with such an almost non-existent blade and it was stressing his wrists far too much. His opponent slanted the angle of his pressure and twisted. They gave out, his arms falling away from the sword and opening up one giant hole of vulnerability and he jumped back. His hand was on his sword even before he heard his last kunai thud in the dirt a distance away and blade drawn in time to deflect a spray of senbon given as cover for the now open enemy before him. That was the price paid for pressing his advantage as it was the earth that caught the sword this time.

* * *

Kakashi was all lean wiry death. She never _ever_ would have thought him to use a long blade of any type – which was ridiculous! - despite seeing him toting around an obvious short bladed weapon constantly on missions and _knowing_ it standardized arsenal for ANBU. Seeing is believing, perhaps. She certainly did now. But he _flowed_ and glided to deliver crippling and fatal blows with weapons and limbs alike, and executed elaborate plans within minutes of conception that she was forced to be as awestruck as many of the spectators she saw around her. This display elevated him to an even higher level of astounding skill and knowledge in her mind even with her having been more familiar with him than most present.

This man that was her teacher – this man she didn't know – scared her.

She was utterly fascinated.

And she knew her eyes to be so very wide as she stared in awe.

* * *

He had seen her, he thought, as he'd been running along the wall, sitting up there by Hokage-sama. But he hadn't been sure, couldn't rule out the stress of the battle or fatigue of his body from distorting his thoughts into being. He had to verify it. A clone returning to him from defeat north in the field confirmed it. His eyes narrowed and anger boiled, mind sharpening to a finer edge. He looked up to meet the oncoming opponent, the man having recovered from his wayward swing.

Kakashi took his anger out on him, and all others within range of _any_ technique.

_How dare she_.

He would _definitely_ be speaking with her after this little examination.

* * *

The distinctive white mask was lain across haphazardly piled pieces of clothing and a pack on the bench before the row of lockers, face up as if it and the past that hide behind it watched him through its eyes. He paid it no mind, didn't have the room to with his head seething at the Hokage's gall to bring a certain someone along. He'd just been going along with routine and had begun his clean up, unable to divert enough attention to anything requiring much effort for all the energy his brain was currently consuming. It was all he could to do clean his weapons and not explode. The sound of the locker room door opening and several sets of footsteps made him tense, but he did not look up even as the sight of her robe flashed out the corner of his eye.

"My, that was quite an impressive show you put up out there." She paused to sigh, picking up a stray piece of uniform off the bench across the room from him before setting it back down disdainfully. "Well, I don't think they've any reason to doubt you now." She focused a smug smile at him.

His hands tightly clenched the sword he held, cloth pausing in its motion of wiping and hilt encased in a white-knuckled grip. "_Why_?" She merely raised her brow, waiting for him to continue. "_Why_ is she _here_?"

Her expression slackened a bit into a wary countenance as everything clicked. So he'd had the presence of mind and enough spare time to pick her out from less than a hundred clustered faces? Was she somehow not giving him his due? She let her eyes take in his ANBU uniformed-clad body, gripping his sword like some sort of lifeline before commenting. "She's here in order to patch up the injured."

"_Bullshit_."

Her brow rose at his crassness. "It's true." She spared another meaningless look around the small room. "She's there now, whether you believe me or not."

"That's not the answer I'm looking for and you know it," he breathed, just _barely_ keeping his anger in check. She was the Hokage, afterall. Though he could tell her own temper was matching him step for step, she nor her guards made any move to put him in his place.

"_Some_one had to expose her to the knowledge she was seeking. And you expected me to wait for _you_?"

She glared at him, both knowing the answer. He was unable to hold the harsh gaze and turned to his sword once more. He stared at it before wiping the blade a final time and sheathing it, strapping it across his back once more. Now that his anger was spent he didn't know what to say, could only wallow in the frustration that was him; his own actions, inactions.

His past was his to keep. No one else need be burdened with, ashamed by it.

"No, it's not. Not anymore." He looked to her at that, an unforgiving set of her features stilling him. "You have her feelings and concerns to consider now that you two are 'involved,'" she voiced sternly. She threw her chin into the air, forewarning him of her unrelenting in this area. "Keep in mind that I will tell her what she wants to know if you won't. _Healthy_ marriages don't have secrets. I don't have the patience for your twisted games any longer! Not where _this_ is concerned. I expect results soon!"

She whirled and went back through the door, guards closing it and tailing closely behind. She had to wear down his defenses, and quickly, if things were to happen in any semblance of a timely manner. Ancestors knew he was challenged in that particular area.

'Forgive me these trespasses,' she pleaded silently to him, 'but it's for everyone's sake. For our future.'

She was halfway up the long stairs before a dramatically harsh crash echoed up to them.

* * *

The fight had been absolutely breath-taking and she knew she'd _never_,_ ever_ forget the way he'd moved – the way he always would in her mind – and the sheer effectiveness and command he held over the battlefield at any given time. To watch him _move_, the way he fought…she wanted to pick apart his brain and ravish all the knowledge inside, take it into herself and hoard it for future use. It was so animalistic – he was - and she couldn't see him as anything other than a magnificent male specimen of some mystical and exotic species primed solely for battle and combat.

How wondrous, she thought as they'd once again made their way to the Hokage tower and settled into their respective positions on either side of the desk. She picked up her new-access file and opened to continue her perusal. There were still so many undiscovered findings to be uncovered about him and this missions file promised much knowledge.

"Ah, just what I expected from him. Even better, actually." The Hokage grinned, thoroughly pleased with herself, so pleased that not even resuming her routine duties brought her down. "That'll show them!"

"Tsunade-shishou," she carefully phrased, "why put him through that if you already knew he was so good?"

"Simple, to justify my choice for him as interim Hokage should something happen to me before another is appointed." She hadn't even stopped her work to answer. "Those old cronies of the council don't believe he's capable of such duties. Let's see their unjustified doubts _now_!"

Sakura only blinked. What else could she do at such a profound statement? Was she serious? Surely she had to be. Her master didn't joke about such things. Or was there some kind of pool going that she didn't know about? In that case, she could certainly see it happening…but was it true? She certainly seemed every bit of sincerity. Did it really matter? Kakashi-sensei had undoubtedly impressed, but…

"Does he know that?" she genuinely wondered, speaking aloud to her teacher.

"Pfft. Of course not. You know the kind of flack I'd get from him if he did?" An 'are you crazy' look had been hastily thrown at her. "As far as he is concerned, it was the normal recertification for high-end mission status."

Yes, she had quite an idea of what the lengthy – from him – discouragement would entail in regards to a position of such power and responsibility. Was Kakashi-sensei really that powerful? Perhaps. After all, Tsunade-shishou was attempting to name him junior Hokage, not the next. The difference was profound.

Her thoughts shifted.

"Tsunade-shishou," she spoke somberly, softly whispering, again looking at the photos of his early ANBU works, "why did you pick me? Why pair me with him?"

Tsunade considered the loaded inquiry, the urge to just put it bluntly quickly eating away the resolve she'd reserved to pull this plan through. It was really too good a concept to give up on. The results would benefit Konoha to untold amounts. They needed this, they needed them _together_. They needed their offspring.

"Because the great house that will result from your union will begin to fill the deep gap of power in Konoha left by the fallen houses, not unlike the Uchiha. Because you have traits that can only strengthen his. Because we want to keep the Hatake in Konoha…because Kakashi is the last _in_ Konoha."

She paused.

"Because Kakashi is getting old." That's really what it came down to. If his blood was to be retained, he needed to act now. They couldn't afford to wait on him any longer.

A confused look was focused on her and Tsunade let Sakura's down-turned lips and crinkled brow mature in silence. She could almost physically see the question forming in her student's mind. "How old _is_ Kakashi?"

"Thirty-four."

Sakura's eyes widened to a painful degree. He was certainly older than she thought – a _lot_ older than she'd thought – but still it wasn't _that_ bad. He was only – she paused to mentally count – about fourteen years older than herself… Kind of creepy when one only thought of the difference but…she had been around him for most of her life that she found it hard to believe. It didn't fit him, really. He didn't act like that. He'd always carried himself as older than them by a decent amount of years - and they'd never questioned that, accepted it as the elder brother figure he'd been for them - but never had he patronized them in any way that might hint at such a large age gap; certainly in areas of battle expertise, but no, never ages.

"…That's really not _that_ old," she said, meeting the Hokage's gaze…hesitantly. Now, really, how sure of herself did _that_ make _her_ sound? Way to go, Sakura.

Tsunade shook her head – once again upon folded and propped hands, a favorite posture of hers - in agreement. "No, it's not. But as a ninja, he's getting up there. As ANBU, he's pushing it. It takes an immense physical contribution to keep not only up but ahead of the game at such high-risk levels."

Tsunade's line of sight dropped to some negative space between her and Sakura, theories and scenarios and memories crowding her thoughts.

"He won't stop moving until he's either dead or duly incapacitated. That's just the type of person he is." Sakura knew that well. "We're afraid he won't come home one day. He _is_ good, but he's aging and the range between him and youth on the field is ever widening. There will be a day when he just can't keep up, no matter how unnatural his speed."

Tsunade gave a weary sigh. "We'd like him around and in good enough shape to truly instruct his children."

It made sense, but it bothered her. Her features still sported their earlier frown. "Why are you so intent on forcing this on him?" Her eyes met the Hokage's. She'd learned quite a bit about him over the insane amount of time they'd spent together in the last year, most of it unintentional and surprising. Hadn't he done enough for Konoha yet?

Tsunade could see the blossoming protectiveness within the gaze. Were they actually growing closer; enough to make this whole proposal possible?

"You're aware of Kakashi's unusual coloring and signature lightning techniques." It was not a question, just a brutal assertion on the lightness of his hair. He was certainly the only person in their village with that stunning eye and hair combination, picture of the Second Hokage on the office wall excluded. Sakura didn't even need the nod she offered. Tsunade knew she knew. "This is because the Hatake clan is originally from Cloud."

"What?" The shock permeated her voice.

"If you were to look at his family scroll, you would notice that he is only the fifth generation of Hatake in Leaf. His stemming ancestors were acquired during the first Great War; penance for Cloud for their role in it, spoils for Fire Country and compensation to Konoha for damages sustained."

Tsunade chose not to mention that his mother was actually of the Inuzuka. Sakura would surely put together the connection of the second Hokage's physical attributes and Kakashi's. She wasn't quite ready to get into _that_ particular depth. "Unfortunately," her voiced lowered, "the following two wars claimed most of their number while subsequent events and personal circumstances claimed the rest. Kakashi was left behind."

She looked Sakura in the eye and channeled her tone, "Are you familiar at all with any events of his past?"

Sakura shook her head. While she's learning a lot about his thoughts, mental processes, mannerisms, and motivations, her repertoire of personal facts remained sadly comparable to that first day of training.

Tsunade nodded, figuring that to have been the case. "Well, his father…_died_… early in Kakashi's life - he was a good man," came the whispered insertion, "orphaning him at age seven." She shrugged the melancholy from her person, ever struggling to remain free of the past. Oh, the irony of _that_ statement as the main crisis _was_ her past. She still cursed Orochimaru daily. "He's been bearing the burden of his clan ever since. But this all happened long before you were born. It's understandable."

Was that supposed to mean it was alright to not know _anything_ about him? Even if he was so unwilling to tell any of his students – 'former,' she mentally corrected – even his betrothed? The normal flush at that title was absent, only a dully reverberating pulse of her heart resulting. She should have tried harder. The few, far in between and little morsels she uncovered about him revealed more and more of the depressingly large and empty canyon labeled 'Void Kakashi.'

But there was one trait that was becoming more and more terrifyingly apparent: Kakashi was disturbingly like Sasuke, and desolately far more complicated.

She used the silence to think. And think. A previous image from a record's photograph of a large sheathed sword taking up the entirety of his back clarified. Reaching and flipping through the stack she found it, scrutinized it and stopped short, her mind connecting the one frozen on paper to the same blade she'd seen strapped to Kakashi's back on numerous occasions. It was the _same_ one. But…the difference in sizes of the ANBU photo and of today… Holy shit! He'd been just a kid!

"How old is he in this?" she asked, mind racing with possibilities as she flipped her wrist to fully turn it towards the Hokage.

Tsunade made the motion of squinting slightly to bring it further into focus before drawing back to comment. "Thirteen...or so. Maybe. I'm not sure. I wasn't in the village at that time."

She flipped the picture to stare at it with wide eyes, alternating between the Hokage and the photograph. The clothes and armor on him were baggy but she didn't recognize it as any uniform. That's not to say that, oh, seventeen years ago the ANBU uniform had been different. "Is that a uniform then? What division's?"

"It's not any division's. Just couldn't find anything to fit him, I'm sure." Tsunade rearranged a stack of…something, straightening it. "He always was a petite child. Mouthy little brat, too…" she mumbled to herself. While he'd been respectful, the level of underlying implications and veiled insults in his tone and carefully chosen words could not be missed. If you were on the same intellectual plane, that is. It was always a mental exercise with him. "Though I'm fairly certain he was thirteen. Could have been a little older but not by much. I know he finally filled out enough to fit into one of ANBU's smallest sizes at fourteen-fifteen."

Sakura found that hard to believe, unable to picture the tall man she knew today as some little waif of a child. And yet the picture in hand showed otherwise, and it was not alone. That explained the baggy clothes, alright. Kakashi mouthy? Hmm, she couldn't see that directed towards superiors, but peers and inferiors, certainly. She'd seen that in action. Damn…in ANBU at such a young age? _ANBU_. What the hell was their one-time teacher?

"Why do you and Jiraiya-sama always call him brat?"

"Because he is one. Always has been; spoiled brat, at that."

"R-really?" She knew her voice betrayed her uncertainty.

Tsunade sighed deeply with more than a touch of sorrow. "No, not really." Sakura's brows drew together, unsure of what it was she was detecting behind the Hokage's words. "He's…had a hard life, too."

Hadn't they all, in some way or another?

* * *

Wow, that was it? Why does it feel so _un_finished? -- This chapter feels so incomplete! Hope no one else thinks so and hopefully the next chapter will deliver. 


	10. Chapter 10

_Sennin_ is not to be confused with _Sannin_. The former means 'sage' and the latter 'three people/of the Three'.

* * *

He was beat. 

Which is exactly why he was taking it easy and reading his book, sitting perched in a tree on one of the training grounds alone, isolated. It was with the intention of avoiding everyone else and with the hope of being left alone. He really didn't feel like human interaction today…or any interaction that involved semi-sentient life. This was a day – _his­ _day – to just say fuck the world and do whatever the hell it was he wanted to do; which happened to be reading. And he was most disinclined to remove his nose from the book for anything for quite some time to come.

But all too soon…

"Hmpf," puffed the most annoyed voice. "You know how long I've been looking for you?" He knew the owner of that voice well. "The morning's already gone! Well, seeing as how you've hoarded yourself away with a literary masterpiece, I can't fault you for any wrong-doing," the older man said smugly, chuckling in gushing over his own work. What? He was proud of it!

Kakashi sighed. He glanced over the top of the cover to take in the other man standing crossly off to the side. He went back to reading. There was a moment of almost awkward silence before the man spoke into it. Really, the Sennin could rarely be caught in a truly discomfited state. "How you holding up?"

So much for that. He only lifted his brow.

"You know," Jiraiya began cautiously, knowing there was some shit – possibly quite deep – that lay underneath this whole situation, "Tsunade's worried about you. Said you won't see her." The seeds of suspicion had probably been planted immediately in his commissioning to fetch the former childhood genius and cultivated into fully bloomed warning long before he had actually found him. Surely something profound was going on behind the scenes if it was taking one of the legendary Sannin so long to find a –albeit good – ninja, right?

Oh, he was much smarter than he looked, the sennin was. Kakashi could tell anyone that any day, if he so desired to reveal crucial information. But he certainly was even less likely to be bothered with it today given the foul mood he was in. And as such, any compliment or observance of the older man's skill that _might_ have been given out any other time was kept to himself. He didn't want to be bothered for a few days. But seeing as how that wasn't going to happen, he thought to just deal with it as quickly as possible.

"I think it's for the best if I don't speak to Hokage-sama for a few days."

Jiraiya cocked an eyebrow and his head at the tone. It wasn't quite disrespectful but…there was something there that belied…_something_. A type of argument? Possibly. A falling out of some sorts? Definitely. He shook his head, deciding that whatever it was, he really didn't want to know or get involved despite having been sent here to check up on their project—he meant ally. Yeah, fellow ally.

Definitely time for a topic change.

"So, how's Sakura?"

There was a very slight but detectable pause before the younger ninja answered flatly. "Fine, I would imagine."

"Oh?" he baited. "Haven't you spoken with your student recently?"

His fingers tightened slightly on the cover, he becoming increasingly vexed with the seemingly innocent and most definitely leading questions. "She is no longer my student."

"Ah, yes. That's right, that's right," Jiraiya nodded sagely, stroking his smooth chin as if the reiteration was some enlightenment. "So there's no reason – no _good_ reason – to keep any personal calls at bay, hm?"

Kakashi threw a glare from the corner of his eye, now knowing _exactly_ where the toad was trying to go. He went back to the text on the page before him. Flipping to the next, he allowed his face to fall blank. "Propriety."

The illicit author openly scoffed at the lame attempt to ward off further steps down the set path. "What use is propriety when the situation's been advanced for you, demands more from you? All that's left is for you to enjoy the opportunity before you! Reap the benefits of your new relationship! The work's already been done!

"Just imagine," the old hermit refused to relent, "what it would be like to share a bed with such a fine, healthy, _young_ and _flexible_ woman? Mmmm," he hummed to himself, expression turning up in some deranged fantasy. "I can just see it now!" A short bout of almost-laughter was smothered. "Did I already mention her youth and all the gloriously _unexplored_ benefits brought with it?"

Kakashi felt the immediate need to brush from his person the intangible aura of lechery followed up by a shower to rid his self of the stench of _wrongness_ floating off the Frog Sage at that most unnecessary comment. But it did stir his anger, an emotion closer to the surface as of late. He sighed heavily, book falling away from his face and gaze focusing blindly on the bark off the side of his nested legs in an attempt to calm down. He liked Sakura. He liked her a lot. But, damn it, this was one instance where sex would ruin everything.

"I would never touch her in such a manner. I would never betray that trust."

"Well, it's not like you really have a choice, is it? No matter how much you disagree with the idea, you still feel it to be your duty somehow, right?" he said not so sagely, suddenly switching gears again and speaking in a tone not quite aggressive but definitely not friendly, not conversationally. Was it something like how a father put his foot down? Firm in his advice? He couldn't remember. "Might as well get used to it. You are no longer her mentor, Kakashi. Unless, of course, you were to take up a _different_ route of instruction…"

Pushing the Sannin forcefully from his mind with renewed effort, lest the birthing images in his mind take over, he pulled _Icha Icha_ up and snapped it open, promptly burying his face in its pages.

"And have some fun with it." He paused as the developing drooling grin took over his lips. "Aahaha! Oh! What an idea!!! Such inspiration! I must capture this!" Jiraiya laughed slightly madly, proclaiming the need to seize the essence of the dream before it escaped him.

The man far more perverted than he left after the parting shot – or perhaps it was more 'wisdom' – leaving him to his…whatevers and tainted visions.

Needless to say, he did not get much reading done after that.

* * *

Another such question and answer session – as she was beginning to call them – on Kakashi with Tsunade concerned more recent and ongoing events. That's what was on her mind at the moment, any way. Sakura wondered if her eyes burned as brightly with her curiosity and desire for mental satisfaction as within. She knew something was making it through her gaze as she recognized the guarded look the Hokage returned hers with. She didn't want to cause a fight - she never did - so she took a moment to compose her tone and phrasing carefully. 

"Why do you keep him so busy?" she asked calmly, noticing the almost relieved slight amusement in Tsunade's eyes.

"We have to keep him occupied otherwise our little elite gets bored." Her features darkened slightly, but Sakura didn't know why…until she continued. "And bored nin lead to missing nin."

Sakura's face pinched in seriousness, her voice becoming firm in her undying resolve. "I don't think Kakashi would ever leave the village," she said strongly, the connotation of 'leaving' having taken on a whole different meaning.

"I don't think he would either," her teacher said, meeting the other's mood. "But while it would be devastating, it would certainly not be the first time Konoha was taken by surprise."

Sakura didn't know exactly whom Tsunade was thinking about, if anyone at all. She herself could bring more than one instance to mind where other reliable shinobi had abandoned the village seemingly out of nowhere. Still, she didn't think that about Kakashi; she knew where his loyalties lay. That was one of the differing points he and Sasuke had, she knew. Where Sasuke's abandonment and subsequent betrayal had gouged her, she just _knew_ Kakashi would hold firm and never turn against the village in such a manner. No matter what the so-called reason.

* * *

"How strong is Kakashi? You've said before he was our best ninja." 

She wanted to know. She wanted to know so much about that which he was unwilling to divulge or too modest to speak about. Her master – and Jiraiya, strangely enough – were being quite forthcoming with a moderate amount of information on the man that was Kakashi of the Sharingan. She supposed it had a lot to do with the fact that they wanted them to wed.

Tsunade let the brush drop from her hand onto its rest. She'd long since given up pretending to work while her student was in this mood. She'd been unable get any work done at all while she was in the room. "Strong. He's the only one to have completed that many A- and S-rank missions in Konoha."

She'd kept her gaze unwaveringly on her student's. What she was speaking of was the truth and she wanted Sakura to understand just how important he was to the village. The vacuum of power that would be left after his death would be incredibly immense, even crippling, if they didn't take precautions. They needed to ensure that capable fighters were there to rise and take his place. A second motivator for enduring all these inquisitive meetings was the hope that knowing more about him would entice Sakura to willingly lay with him. And, yes, she meant in the sexual sense. Konoha needed the results. Who knew but the Hatake may have reached their own blood trait given just one or two more generations. Their reliable pool of talent had gotten such a sudden boost with Sakumo and only exploded with Kakashi.

She noticed her student unable to respond, although she didn't know the reason behind it. But she figured it had something to do with Sakura compiling all the previously revealed information in her head and applying it to the ever expanding puddle of knowledge about him. The sorting was occupying most of the girl's energies. Although the other villages' Bingo books had him listed as S-class, he'd grown since his encounter with Orochimaru and Akatsuki. He's come so far since he was a child.

Tsunade felt the need to comment further, driving all spoken and unspoken meanings home. "If he were to leave the village," she paused - it was understood that leave meant 'missing' - "…I'm not sure he could be classified."

Sakura's large bright eyes awoke from her thoughts to focus in shocked understanding at Tsunade. Just like unclassified missions, unclassified ninja were taken down with _squads_ in organized operations, not teams on hand-out missions.

Tsunade's smile was bitter. "Let's just hope that if he ever does leave, he bears Konoha no grudge."

Sakura should have known better than to fear any physical harm from Kakashi, but she couldn't stop the shudder of terror at that scenario. It would probably require Naruto in shifted form to take him…if they wanted him back alive, anyway. It was hard to say, now. Both were such amazingly _strong_ ninja.

* * *

She was flipping through his unclassified file again. The wealth of knowledge contained in this 'open' source was stunning. But she still itched to get a hold of the ANBU one. 

There was a picture so sad that she couldn't stop staring at it. It was raining - as was obvious by the puddles and rings issued from sandaled feet - and one little boy stood out in the open, his image obscured by the curtain of water. She didn't know what he was looking at so blankly, so unmoving, but she'd seen that look before. It was usually on the battlefield or in the hospital; shock, she named it. Who was this person to have captured this child at this time of denial? Where were they? She didn't think she'd ever seen Kakashi look as young as he did there in her hand.

She held it up further off her lap to get a closer look - perhaps glean from it the cause - when it was lit from behind to reveal writing on its back. Flipping it over she read, eager to put more details to this boy-no-more who cried to be held and comforted. There was a date – ever important historic event it was – followed by a caption. Her hand went to her mouth and she spoke to the air, "Oh, Kakashi."

_Kakashi Hatake (age 7) outside family manor as father's body is removed._

She wanted to squeeze him now for all the years he'd gone without it, to still comfort him even if he would never know the reason behind it.

Shuffling through the next few pictures in slight frantic drive to discover if there was more, she came across what revealed to be a snapshot series of a portion of the night. Why it had been in his file she knew not, but didn't see anything relating it to him other than it being his past and him having been there. Maybe that's all there was to it. Maybe it was misplaced from the psychological testing all ANBU periodically underwent. She was betting on the latter; like she was going to reveal anything of that to anyone. She wanted to prevent any 'mistakes' from being corrected. Instead, she drank it up.

The next photo showed a tall man – Yondaime, she recognized – with a hand placed on one shoulder of the young elite, Kakashi still seemingly unaware of his surroundings and staring blankly ahead. There was another where the Hokage was bent to the boy's level, obviously trying to whisper sensibility into his ears; a startling one where a most hopeless look was directed to the photographer, the Hokage's features borderline desperation and slightly pleading. Perhaps he was asking the photographer to cease his disrespectful activities and lend him some support. Then the Hokage was directly in front of Kakashi, the boy's visible face still void of emotion. The next showed the Yondaime stiltedly directing Kakashi away, the boy's sight thrown over his shoulder in attempt to still look back. Immediately following were the photographs that had her in tears, the little ninja prodigy, genius, and boy he still was really showing through the crisis. Kakashi was being swept up by the Yondaime, then sitting upright as he rode the man's hip, body and neck straining to look back.

It was at that point the camera angle changed, the subjects having walked passed. Kakashi's eyes were peeking over the Hokage's shoulder, over arms wrapped around Yondaime's neck and looking just off center to where she imagined the event at having taken place. The last in the series drove the stake into the deepest point of her mother's instinct, showing that he'd finally given in and turned to bury his head into Father Flash's neck, arms pulled tightly across it, hand of comfort large against his small back.

Her Kakashi was not an emotionless husk of a man. He had cried, too, once upon a time.

* * *

A lull in between missions and he chose to spend it on alcohol he wouldn't drink. Not his smartest move…or habit. 

He let his fingers fiddle with the sake cup in front of him, eye watching it as the others conversed and laughed around him. He knew he'd only make the alcohol warmer, but he wasn't particularly concerned with that. He sighed in glancing to his customary order of a still full pitcher. He didn't much feel like drinking tonight, or interacting all that much, and he continued in maintaining his surreal state of awareness.

There was a greeting as someone new arrived at the table and most eyes shifted briefly to record the newcomer. He remained focused on his cup, unaware and uncaring until a heavy warm weight pushed itself into his attention span via his lap. Overcoming and quickly hiding his shock, he mentally noted that the body was less controlled than it should have been.

She'd landed heavily on his leg, unabashedly sliding up and in to sit fully on his left thigh. He missed the look shared first between Kurenai and Anko then between the rest of the table, but he had a strong suspicion it was there on their faces as well. He was too sharply preoccupied with the girl so comfortably seated on him and making a move on his drink. Not to mention seeing her was much sooner than he was prepared for, thoughts of an earlier discussion still plaguing him horribly.

"Oh, ish thish your drink, Kaka-Kakashhi-shenshei?" she slurred, firmly brushing his hand off his cup to palm it in her own. He could only watch incredulously – and Genma with utmost amusement – as she quickly downed it. She slammed the little cup down with a loud satisfied sigh. "Ah! That's good sake!"

She reached for his pitcher to pour another serving before Kakashi grabbed her arm at a slender wrist, halting her motion. "No, it's atrocious," he stated, turning to speak tolerantly into her temple, looking from her frustrated concentrating features to her reaching and flexing fingers. "You're just too drunk to realize it."

This was _so_ not like her. Something must have happened. They hadn't seen each other for almost two weeks but he didn't think anything that dire could have taken place. She certainly hadn't missed him that much to just let loose like she has. He sighed. Damn it.

Kakashi slid a half-assed wary gaze over to the local 'closet' nymphomaniac – only because he continued to deny it - residing at the table, suspicious movement having attracted his attention. Genma leaned over across from them and picked up the pitcher, good naturedly ignoring Kakashi's warning gaze. Genma's free hand pulled the little porcelain cup closer.

"Here, love, let me rescue you from your struggles," he said smugly. Moving the pitcher to a cradle in order to pour, he grinned broadly. "Hatake sucks with women."

His free hand moved the cup the last little bit before a hard slam and crushing weight bore down on his arm. Genma's grin dropped in meeting Kakashi's now scalding glare. But the look he focused on the girl in his lap was long suffering and patient, even while grinding Genma's wrist into the wood just a bit more.

"You've had enough to drink, Sakura."

Genma smiled then frowned at the change in tone the other shinobi directed at Sakura. But that was quickly removed from the forefront of his thoughts as the pressure on his arm greatly increased for a moment to where he could swear he felt the splinters coming in through his sleeve. Damn that Hatake. He should've known he'd notice him trying to escape.

Her whining broke him from his lamenting and he watched transfixed, at her face – not for long – as she squirmed in the _other_ man's _lap_! His _lap_, damnit! What he wouldn't give for a hot little piece of that action to-

He couldn't see exactly what had happened only that Kakashi had reacted quickly to some movement of Sakura's. However, judging by Anko's narrowed eyes and conspiratorial talking behind hand to a deceptively and naively wide-eyed Kurenai, he bet those two did; especially when Anko then proceeded to point around the other side of the table. Genma attempted to stand up in order to see, only to be halted by another perfunctory rub into the tabletop. He threw a sneer at the elite ninja holding him prisoner from his perving by a single wrist.

He threw a helpless look to Kurenai, begging her to take pity on his devious mind. And when she did, motioning somehow to him of a hand on a thigh and throwing a nod in Hatake's direction, Genma let drop his jaw. With wide eyes, he nodded at the subject, then shook his head in denial, then cocked it back in questioning. Really? Kurenai nodded again in confirmation and Genma laughed to himself, all sharing a good quiet laugh as the information was passed around the table while Kakashi continued to wheedle the girl away from his drink. Even Genma was growing nervous at Anko's budding grin.

"But I'm _thirsty_, Kakashi!"

Man, to what new lows he could take that accentuation!

Kakashi adjusted his hand on her leg to secure her on his as her failing sense of balance wavered in another squirming fit. "If you're really so thirsty," – oh, Genma's mind itched! – "you can have some water or juice…or milk."

They all snickered, growing louder as Kakashi raised his brow in acknowledging their noticing of his fixation on her age – or was it just the difference between them? They all stiffened in surprise as Sakura suddenly threw herself across his lap and the table, slightly flopping as she whined in attempt to reach the now distant liquor. "But I'm thirsty _now_!"

Kakashi was sitting incredibly straight, eye wide and eyebrow stressed.

Genma was pulled from his jealousy and did a double take at Anko's feral grin and issuing statement of promised mischief. "Is it just me or does Hatake look positively uncomfortable?"

Genma shivered at her tone and gleaming sneer. But far be it from him to jump on the fun wagon. He gave a complementary grin of his own. "Why, I do believe he is." Motioning to the event in the other man's lap with his eyes, Genma continued to push the limits.

Oh, what a glare Kakashi was fixing him with. But the accompanying push on his arm made up for any lacking his glare may have failed to convey. "Say it, Genma, and I'll-"

He was torn from his threat as Sakura continued to wreak havoc on his patience and control. His gaze flickered from his ire of Genma to the…thing happening in his lap that he was really trying not to think about. She really had no idea how strong she was when inebriated. The loss of strict chakra control in this state could very well lead to a most unfortunate occurrence for anyone. Looking between them again, he threw one last glare in warning to Genma and a parting shot in way of a particularly fierce grind into the wood before releasing him to still the thrashing on his lap.

Genma hastily reclaimed the freed appendage and tried to rub the pain from his wrist, knowing the look in Hatake's eye meant he wouldn't forget it. Still, despite the admonishment, he couldn't keep the grin from his face. Meeting Anko's eyes in a knowing look, his smile widened.

"Geez, Hatake,' Anko began, "what'd you do, stick that erection up your own ass?" His answering glance said 'clearly _not_ amused.'

"Man, get this guy two more bottles!" she yelled over the din to the bartender, holding a back-handed, two fingered signal up. "He needs to loosen a stick up his ass!" Turning her attention to him again, she commented as he turned away to focus on the girl now cradled in his arms. "You really need to unwind, Hatake. Or is that unplug?"

He looked down as Sakura gurgled and lolled her head, now resting in the crook of his arm. She'd left him rather helpless and cornered but this hold had afforded him the most control over her thus far. It hadn't taken much of the Sharingan to calm her…

"I could go to shleep right here," she mumbled out in a sluggish slur. And then attempting to pull herself into a ball on top of him, murmured, "I think I will…"

"You most certainly will not," he ground out unbidden, pulling his headband back in place. Catching himself with a look out the corner of his eye at the others, he announced, "I'm taking her home."

As he was gathering her up, Anko was formulating. And as he approached the door, she made sure to draw enough breath so that the whole bar heard. "Don't hurry back, Hatake! And remember to be gentle!" And in a move frighteningly uncharacteristic, a lone and bold middle finger flashed briefly in display for their viewing pleasure. It only fed their spontaneous burst of raucous laughter.

"Yeah, Hatake. You need one!" Anko burst over them all. "Take your time! And then some more!" They'd actually disturbed him enough for a lewd gesture! How novel! How _unheard_ of! He was_ pissed_! This was cause for celebration!

She reached over to take Kakashi's forgotten sake and threw back half the bottle before letting the laughter consume her once more. He'd renewed it by barely refraining from splintering the door of the bar as he kicked it open. She fell fully back into her chair, laughing hard and wiping tears from her eyes. Throwing down another gulp, she let Genma take it from her, Kurenai keeping not so polite amusement behind her hand. Their laughter was dying as the door finally closed behind the bewildered and frightened patron entering as the flustered ninja left, yet they still shared happy glances.

That had so been worth it.

* * *

He sighed, his pace across the rooftop unhurried. Yet he was burdened with more than just a barely conscious and intoxicated friend in his grip. He glanced down at her, face round with curves from childhood and maturity, and even some in between. The same could be said for the rest of her. He sighed again at making no progress in the frustrating situation he found himself in. This was getting to be too much. He could see that was so for the both of them; this little episode helping to quite clearly illustrate that. 

Many more occurrences like tonight and he would be driven insane. He'd been through a lot in his life but he didn't think he could take much more. Pressure of this type would surely make him crack where all else in the past had failed. It was a scary thought…and he didn't scare easily. But the question remaining was what exactly terrified him about it all?

Being married, having kids – little versions of himself and Sakura running around – having a reason to return from missions, having people _waiting_ for him? Being responsible for innocent lives? Not that that was really so different from teams past but…it was. Somehow, it was when they were your kids. Not that he knew what that felt like yet, but he could imagine what it _might_ feel like… To have little mirrors blindingly reflecting all your faults up into your face with features aglow in idolatry and awe was pressure so much more crushing than any other that failure would surely strike him down before them in the face of their disappointment.

He shook his head clear of the thoughts, for now. This was not a good time or place to delve into such endless contemplation. She stirred in his arms, the Sharingan's light hypnosis already ending and he gratefully redirected his attention to her promising distraction.

"Wh-what are you doing?" She was obviously still quite drunk.

"Taking you home," he said smoothly, bounding over two more roofs.

"What!? NO!" she panicked, eyes becoming wide as she tried to push away from him.

He slowed as he dealt with her relatively weak struggles, trying not to drop her as he readjusted his hold. When she continued to fight him he came to a stop in the middle of the next roof. He didn't want to set her down for fear of not being able to restrain her once more…and possibly destroying several neighboring properties before he did.

But she didn't try to escape once he had ceased movement, only turned large pleading eyes up to him. "Please, not there. Not home." She continued to look at him unblinkingly, maybe hoping it would drive her wish further along the road of legitimacy. "My parents will kill me."

Ah, so that was it.

He looked at her, eye and body now heavier with the added complication. Where could he take her? She seemed to be reading him well enough for her state. Suddenly there was an inkling of suspicion that she may have been less compromised than he'd been lead to believe. She seemed to have read the dilemma his body was somehow giving away for all her inebriation.

"Take me anywhere, just not there. Please!" But where…? "…Your place, even."

His narrowed eye focused sharply on her. Was she really drunk? "No," he said firmly. Perhaps a little too firmly, he pondered as her eyes immediately began swelling with tears. He heaved a sigh – the largest one tonight – and relented. "Ino's. I'll take you to Ino's," he compromised before heading off again and switching directions slightly.

She offered no further resistance or fuss.

* * *

She was _terribly_ embarrassed about last night. Really. And she couldn't keep the burn from her cheeks as she related the completely awkward and discomforting tale from the drunken escapade. If Tsunade-shishou hadn't pried so strongly, never would another soul have known. _Ever_. 

Stupid Sasuke and Naruto driving her crazy. Stupid her for breaking down and giving in to being childish and throwing a fit just because they always did, had done just prior to that, tempting her to their level.

"Ugh," she moaned, slapping her forehead. "What does he think of me now? Do I even want to know?" Her hand slid down her face. He had been so gracious about it. And kind, after all she did. She wondered how much he wasn't telling her… She sighed in resigned indignity, knowing that those who'd been witness would be sure to fill her in otherwise. "Probably nothing at all, huh," she mused to herself. "Not a damned thing has changed, right? Probably sees me even more the immature girl than before… If anything at all."

"It would be a mistake to think him as unaffected as that."

"Wh-what do you mean?" she started, shocked out of her thoughts by the sudden observance. Did her master know something she didn't?

"He's a man, after all."

Sakura didn't know how to take that…or what to think now. Was that supposed to mean what she thought it was supposed to? Did that mean that Kakashi was at least partially turned on by her? Nonsense. As if little Sakura Haruno could move the infamous Copy Ninja in such a scandalous manner. That was giving her undesirable curves far too much weight.

"Give it a try, see what happens."

"Excuse me?" Sakura stumbled over her words.

"Throw yourself at him, on him. Tease him, see how he responds," Tsunade said over her paperwork. "Conduct an experiment and monitor the results. Keep it for your own knowledge."

"Wh-what's the point in that?" She was horrifically embarrassed and red just thinking about doing the things Tsunade was suggesting. "What-what if he – Yondaime forbid – _reacts_? What if he-he tries to t-take it farther?"

Her teacher paused to look up from her work, staring in disbelief at Sakura stuttering like some little crushing schoolgirl. "Why, I would say entice him all the way."

"_What?_" Sakura was completely flushed now, her throat closing on her and body tensing as it prepared to off itself to avoid the theoretical encounter.

"Take him to bed. Or let him take you. Remember, I'm expecting children from the two of you."

She was absolutely mortified that her teacher had just said that to her. Yes, she knew it was an _eventual_ goal but to outright push her into it? She wanted to cry. And then die, preferably swiftly.

"Besides, look at it as a way to get rid of those awkward premarital moments. Screw around all you want." She bent back down to her desk. "And I'm sorry, Sakura dear, but I've really no more time to spare away from work. There's so much to be done and I've wasted so much already. We'll have to talk later."

Effectively dismissed, Sakura woodenly removed herself from the Hokage's presence. She needed to talk to someone, someone she could trust and who would understand her. She retreated to the most secluded balcony she knew of in the Hokage tower. She performed the seals once and waited. Then waited some more. She did them again, thinking she'd somehow screwed them up. Nothing. Damnit! Was she so upset as to not get them straight in her anguish? She sniffled and wiped some tears away, preparing to try again.

* * *

Pakkun broke off his conversation with Kakashi, turning large brown eyes upwards to meet the silently observant one of Kakashi. 

"What is it?" Kakashi asked with his brow raised.

Pakkun's features drew downwards in concentration, weighing out what his senses were telling him. He thought carefully before speaking, not wanting to cause undue alarm but needing to alert Kakashi to the situation. He very well couldn't be in more than one place at a time, after all. "Sakura is calling."

Kakashi's eyebrow drew even further inwards. "Is she in trouble?"

He paused slightly before replying, looking up once more. "Unknown, but she is distressed."

Kakashi nodded, schooling his features. "Let's go." They both took to the roofs in search of the conflicted young woman.

* * *

Sakura turned towards the direction she felt Pakkun coming from, wiping tears from her eyes. She stilled in a jerky motion when she sensed and saw immediately after the person whom this state was caused over. She did not want to see him right now, not at all. Not after last night and _not_ after what had just transpired. …But seeing as how he looked so terribly concerned over her, she hadn't the heart to brush him off. And, really, it wasn't his fault. And she did kind of owe him. Big time. 

Damn.

"I'm sorry," she sniffed, wiping another tear as he landed from roof-hopping. "I didn't mean to cause you any trouble. I just meant to call Pakkun."

"No, it's alright," Kakashi shook his head. "We'd just been talking."

"Oh." She hadn't known Pakkun was already out, hadn't stopped to think what might happen if two people tried to call him at once.

"Are you alright?" Kakashi voiced gently, no doubt having seen her emotional state long before he'd entered her range of detection.

"Yeah," she said in her raw voice, wiping again at her face. "I…just needed to talk to someone and… I wanted to talk to Pakkun."

Kakashi drew back a little and nodded, starting to get what she meant. He would leave them alone, if that's what she wanted, but he wanted to make sure everything would be fine. "I can stay, too, if you need me."

Sakura swallowed in indecision. She really hadn't wanted to face him at all considering the topic; but he'd said it so gently that she didn't want to shoo him away, seem as if she was trying to get rid of him.

"It's alright, Sakura."

He read her mind again. How did he always know just what she was stumped on? Kakashi would understand if she told him, wouldn't he? He felt as trapped by this arrangement as she did, right? She swallowed again and ran a hand over her face. She didn't know. Maybe…maybe she should just spend some time with them tonight…and see how it goes from there. They didn't have to do anything, just talk and sit and be with each other. That would be a good start, right? Maybe she could work on the physical distance thing while she was at it, too. Not along the lines of what Tsunade had said, but she knew it needed working on. If they were to eventually…_lay_ together, they'd have to get past each other's personal spaces first to make it less awkward, maybe even almost comfortable. She would try for little things, like hands on arms, his face, hair; things of the like that wouldn't alarm him too greatly, especially out of their established 'comfort zone' of the clearing but still not so public. Yeah, that's what she'd do.

"No, it's alright," she agreed as she dried the last of her tears. She reached down to pick up Pakkun as he trod within range, squeezing him to her chest and giving him a much needed hug. "Let's go get ice cream or something. I need to just sit," she suggested, already walking away with Pakkun in arms and pursuing distance between them.

Kakashi followed behind, hands buried in pockets.

Time. Just time together. It was always nice to just _sit_ with him. Pakkun would help keep it from becoming too intimate on any level. It was for that reason that she hugged him so closely, wanting to keep that buffer between her troubled thoughts and the root, even if he hadn't been the one to push the thorn beneath her skin and bleed forth the circumstance.

* * *

Much appreciation and respect goes out to Pork Chop's Little Ditty for sticking with me through my haphazard and irregular schedule to beta this chapter and add much needed insight from the readers' perspective. 

As for the rest of you… There! I updated! Now leave me alone! T.T

Sadly, as a few of you probably already suspect...I will update when enough coherent story has accumulated and when I get to it.


	11. Chapter 11

* * *

It was the type of day that had people running for shade to get away from the hot sun only to find that the almost-cool breeze under the trees could offer no escape from the air saturated with humidity. But that didn't stop them from trying it anyway. Well, _her_. He'd just been dragged along. She had been positive the ice cream would help. So she had told him and so he had further protested before giving up at her insistence and followed behind.

As he'd known, their tree's shadow – large, though it was - would not give them the refuge she was seeking.

"I-I just wanted to thank you for…you know, the other day," she said sheepishly into her iced treat. Hearing no trademark hum – perhaps even sensing his confusion – she chanced a glance to her side at him. He was granting her some rare direct attention by way of one extremely compressed eyebrow. She could read it clearly as the grossly humid day: _What?_

Looking back into her lap with its cradled ice cream, she explained. "You know," she broke off to bring it up to her lips, "…for the bar…thingy," she whispered around a well timed lick.

His features fell, exasperated. "Sakura," he huffed out, fingers of one hand scratching at the hairs covering his neck, "that was over three _months_ ago."

"Yeah…but I never really thanked you for it. Not really…" Her voice was almost…petulant. He was fairly certain he could see a slight pout under all that cream currently at her lips.

He sighed and shook his head. Honestly, if they hadn't talked about it until now, didn't she understand that nothing needed to be said? There were times where he just never thought he'd figure her out. Did women always dwell on things for so long? He thought it resolved long ago, as something understood between them. Apparently it had been bothering her for all this time.

"You weren't completely in control of yourself," he said in his way, sliding a side glance over his pages at her. "You should have known I wouldn't have held anything against you."

Her cheeks flushed. The statement 'should have known me better' was horribly transparent in his forgiving tone. She felt more the little school girl now for having been called on an old fault - one that ran back to her academy days - of dwelling on things past too much. She frowned into the frozen cream in her hands and tried to be angry at _him_ rather than herself. But he paid her embarrassment no mind and went back to reading, his ears forever attuned to any forthcoming reply. She still had a _lot_ to learn about him.

How the hell did he always manage to let slip her fury so easily? Damn that attitude of his! Damn his too nice…guyish-ness! She shook her head at the horrible train-wrecked thought. Unable to take her frustration out on such a kind person – a part of her mentally scoffed at that– she instead took a vicious bite of her treat.

Take _that_ ice cream! Cha! Bastard cream!

* * *

It seemed things were back to the old routine. In, out; out; in. More out than in, really, where Kakashi was concerned. She…didn't understand the sudden urgent need for his skills; the seemingly overwhelming importance for a ninja of his level for this extended a period. Tsunade had really been running him hard for the better half of the year, especially so for the last few months. And she didn't know – didn't know if she _wanted_ to know – if they were internally or externally originating missions. Was he off working for home or out 'improving' foreign relations? She'd be interested to see what his mission ranking tally was at now given all the activity these past four months.

She'd come to plea to Tsunade for his sake. She wasn't asking that he _stop_ going on missions, just that they not be so close together… The signs of fatigue he'd been showing lately were beyond those a good night's sleep would remedy. She feared he was exhausting his body's limits. She didn't want any fatal encounter to have been preventable by only a few solid hours of sleep. Not only would his spirit be forever in unrest for the embarrassing death – she could see him moping around the village in his eternally ghostly form – but he would haunt her 'til her own end for not having intervened on his behalf.

While that was slightly amusing in its morbidity, there was a deeper vein of thought that gave her such unease. They were supposed to be together…_together_ together. So why was it that they rarely saw each other? What was _really_ going on that Hokage-sama kept him running about like that? There was obviously something behind the scenes but she didn't know how much stock to put into the direction it was likely to take. Her chest tightened every time she stopped to think about it. She was sure this couldn't be good. But she just had to hope that all this effort was worth it; that it could prevent _something_ with all this scurrying about. She knew Kakashi was not the only ninja subjected to such activity, but she feared for him most.

And the thought that he was not alone in this undercover activity made her pause outside the Hokage's office. She stood with fingers wrapped around the handle, biting her lip in indecision. What right did she really have coming here to ask what she was going to, knowing others were being subjected to the same thing? She bit down harder and squeezed her eyes shut, knuckles whitening.

She didn't. She _couldn't_ ask that Tsunade spare him the misfortunes others were put before. Her fingers slipped from the handle. She turned from the door, preparing her retreat. She would have to rethink her request. Yes. She would withdraw for now and more carefully analyze exactly what it was she thought about this whole scenario before self-righteously marching in to defend his honor only to rain down on her own parade with such insecurities.

She was only trying to look out for him, was all.

She guess she…just wanted to save him.

Like he always did for her.

* * *

He just gave her that woefully dorky blank look, hands stuffed in pockets and shoulders hunched, blinking slowly at her. What? What did she want? He'd just gotten back. There's no possible way he could have done anything to have upset her while only having been in the village for not even two hours. No way.

…Was there?

Why was she staring at him like that?

"Kakashi?"

He blinked. Such a timid voice. His eye narrowed. What was she up to?

"Hm?" he hummed, sliding cursory glances left and right before warily returning to her. He was only gathering information of possible impending ambush. This reeked like one of their old pranks to unmask him. When she didn't answer right away, he raised his brow at her. 'Yes?' it said in his place.

"…I think we really need to talk." Her body dropped all its insecurities and he straightened as her eyes grabbed his.

He blinked again as he gauged her. She was serious. _Really_ serious. Something must have happened.

Was this the boiling point?

* * *

The weather had turned against them in their training field and with her ice cream long finished, they had decided to head their separate ways only to have the sky hastily remedy that and trap them under a tree with a torrent of rain. They had talked in the…relative dryness about what Tsunade had said, about _some_ of their thoughts – as if Kakashi would reveal anything at all; about nothing, again. But things eventually come to a point that must be passed to determine the direction of the evolution in a relationship. And theirs hit that point this night. All the talk combined with the wet, the weather, their exhaustion, and the rollercoaster of emotions with the expectations of the now eleventh month old 'mission', her mental state got the better of them both and came bearing down. Mostly on him.

He didn't even remember which particular topic or response had triggered her temper, but he'd been aware of the steadily building tension that was now erupting before him. To say she was alone in her frustration would be a lie. He didn't lie. Truth was a convenience carefully omitted in some circumstances, but he despised lying. Yet there was equally and frighteningly growing aggravation on both sides and it pained him to know that some of it was mutually directed.

What was happening to _them_?

Was their friendship decomposing?

Would their repertoire be the cost of this venture?

His very core quivered to think such a price might be paid. But then again he couldn't help thinking that maybe she was making a bigger deal out of this than was necessary. It couldn't be _that_ bad, could it? That…_topic_. Or was that the continual mistake he kept blinding himself to? He thought he knew then.

"I haven't even seen your face and you and everybody else expects me to have _sex_ with you! Tell me, Kakashi," she lightly sniffled and threw her hands up into the air, chest heaving from her previous expense of energy. He didn't see how she _wouldn't_ be heaving after _that_ yell. "How am I supposed to get around that? How am I supposed to just _ignore_ that!?"

He remained quiet. Really, what could he say to that? There was nothing. There was nothing he _could_ say. Nothing existed that would suffice to ease the kind of borderline betrayal he was sensing in her tone. Of course he trusted her – with his life – but this was something strictly personal. Her explosion had revealed the heart of the matter. But it was true, though. There was so much 'unknown' between them. How could they even possibly hope to pull this off? He still wasn't sure it was worth it.

However… His eye wandered around the space about her body, thinking on what he should – what he _had­_ to– do. It was raining quite heavily but he could still pick out the tears that beaded along her lower lids before they joined the rainwater coursing down her round cheeks. And the rain wasn't going to stop anytime soon…but neither was she.

Sakura…

This again…What was the difference between sex in the dark and a mask once they got to that stage? He didn't believe there was really any 'if' at this point in time. It was apparently so very important to her; enough that she couldn't even think about basic things without resorting back to this. It wasn't the first time this had been brought up, although past references were never this grim.

He didn't want to hurt her.

He didn't.

He didn't want to.

And so, he would give her this; something so of himself that the ache of its loss was already pushing his survival instincts into overdrive and tensing his muscles for flight. This was fear he was feeling. What would come after this, he didn't know. He hated not knowing.

Her arm was lifted to wipe the back of her wrist against her cheek and he moved, falling heavily to kneel before her. Fear had to be fought immediately before it was allowed to take hold. Here he was on his knees on the edge of grassland and forest, face up-turned in submission and about to drown in the onslaught of nature as she only sniffled and looked down at him. Did she not realize the significance of this? How hard this was for him?

The point in which her crying paused was obvious as she fixed him with a confused stare. His eye only closed for the brief amount of time it took to tilt his chin up towards her. Go ahead.

"Kakashi?"

There was wonder and a quietly simmering excitement in her eyes, mingling heavily with surprise and slight anticipation. She seemed to be gaining control of herself as her arms fell to her sides, overcome with emotion. Was it real? He could read the question clearly in her bright eyes. Her arms came up slowly, haltingly as if he might jerk away at any moment when she got too close. His eye fluttered closed as tentative fingertips brushed against his skin at the border of his mask. The rain against his lashes proved too heavy to keep open.

So he told himself. Indeed.

She ran them hesitantly along its edge, indecisive. He pushed the headband up off his eye - oh, God, what was he doing? – so very slowly opening up. Two fingers traced the portion of the scar just above his mask, running slowly over it, back and forth as she deliberated in wonder at what was being presented to her. He wished she would decide one way or the other. The light touch was tickling more than one sense. His eyes tightened even as he fought to keep the muscles from clenching shut when soft fingertips dipped below. Slim fingers delicately held the cloth from his face, the tenting of it against her knuckles letting air flow in and complicating the sensations scurrying over his skin. She wondered at the feel of what she could not see.

It was and wasn't what she'd been expecting. Resting them against his face made his skin feel cool and soft. But when she grazed the pads across the surface even the tiniest of distances, she could feel the course little hairs pushing their way out from under the epidermis and-- It felt like she was being watched and she shifted her marveling eyes to see that he was peering vacantly from slit lids and underneath long lashes, his deep irises prominent against rain-paled flesh and natural coloring.

She was looking for any warning in his blank stare, for the final alarm that would halt her actions. She didn't want to overstep any boundaries in the action she'd taken as encouragement. Although she wanted this – _badly_ – she respected him greatly and didn't want to sacrifice his friendship for it. Seeing nothing either way, she slid her fingers downwards until her tips curled underneath the hard line of his jaw. And with a final look to seal any last chances, she flattened her hands on either side of his face and slowly slid the heel of her hand down his cheeks, the material of his mask bunching at her wrists as she went.

She slowly released a deep breath, ingraining this event – its purpose, its meaning – on the list of important happenings in her life. She took her time gazing at his bared features. Her eyes had automatically gone to his lips. Why do eyes always go there first? Maybe it had to do with the fact that she still cradled his head in her hands, his prominent chin propped up and the cloth bunched near them holding heavy visual weight.

As it was, they were pressed in a straight line. She knew he was trying to be as nonchalant as possible but could now clearly see that he couldn't quite get his body to cooperate. If she knew anything it was muscle structure and she could see how the corners of his mouth pulled, however slightly. And even if she didn't, the tense jaw resting in her palms was evidence enough.

It was a good line, his jaw, and her thumbs freed themselves to travel a ways along it absently. Her gaze meandered upwards, taking in the nose, cheek one and cheek two, continuing to trace the scar that took her all the way up past his eyebrow. That had been a nasty cut at one time, painful, too. Her thumb stretched to trace the ridges, cataloguing the fine medical points on its infliction and healing. He'd lost the eye, he'd said. She saw how it easily claimed it. Her thumb brushed over the lid hiding the implanted organ lightly. Such pain there. Her brows furrowed at the thought.

She paused for some time and Kakashi opened his eyes briefly for a gauging peek at her inaction. He'd kept them closed to better allow her to…adjust to _him_ as he was. It was better that way, easier…for him. She was still studying him, her brows drawn close in the analysis. He let his eyes fall half-lidded, her torso filling his vision but staring at nothing. She continued undisturbed.

The first thing that hit her about his open features was that he was definitely striking. The shinobi part of her mind knew this could be – and probably had been– used to a sickening advantage on the mission front. But what kept her staring was disbelief and ethereal wonder. By the Hokage, he looked like a _boy_. Was he really in his thirties? He…couldn't be, not with _this_ face.

She had asked Tsunade sometime long ago in one of her many attempts to glean information on Kakashi's mask. Her wording had been more like 'what's he look like?'

Tsunade had only thrown a wide-eyed and baffled look at her saying in a voice equally bewildered, _'What would you want to see that baby face for?'_

Baby face?

Baby face, indeed.

And yet…the blush boiling just under the surface of her own cheeks should have told her that something _much_ more mature was skirting the chimera before her.

The youthful apparition wavered when his eyes opened to peer at her. They were much too sharp and experienced to maintain that particular illusion. No, he only looked childish when his eyes were closed. When opened, he was something else entirely…and she couldn't find the words to describe his appeal. It broke her trance and she shivered once in the cold rain before her hands slowly slid along his face to grasp the back of his head. They pressed on the crown, drew him in, and held him to her. His lids were heavy as she exhaled and wrapped her arms around to keep him in place. She bent closer, whispering a soft 'thank you' into his hair, and his eyes fell closed, the warmth of her soft body and encompassing grip lulling him into an odd calm, she now sheltering _him_.

He wasn't sure if the hiccups meant she was still crying but his arms remained at his sides. She was comfortable, after all. And the rain still fell.

He was setting himself up for disaster, he could feel it.

He never did return the embrace.

* * *

She thought she'd made him angry. Three days had gone by and she had not yet seen him. Or even _heard_ from him. Of course she was nervous. While it was undeniable something had been irrevocably changed that day, it was unclear in which way, to what effect. Would this be for the better or would this further rend them apart even as it seemed they were growing closer?

Or _felt_ that they were getting closer. At the very least, close enough to have let last night come to be.

No, _they'd_ changed. She understood him better than she ever had; felt that he was even beginning to trust her with things not otherwise revealed to others. Those few occasions in the clearing where he actually unwound and deemed it – her – safe enough to recline upon were profound. They were rare enough that each occurrence still surprised her and held more significance each time.

He hadn't wanted to do it. She knew it then – would always remember _that_ – but had _wanted_ so badly that she let him do it, what he felt _had_ to be done. And she hadn't been sorry. There was _trust_ now between them as _people_ that had never even come close to being present before. As shinobi – teammates – undoubtedly and assuredly their steps danced around each other. But as individuals – _friends_ ­– there had been only stumbling and the awkward motions to rejoin that dance.

But now – _now_ after everything – she could say she knew him a little better…as a man. And she wouldn't trade that for all the trouble it would have saved her in the future. And she planned to make sure Tsunade-sama knew it. Because while Hokage-sama looked out for the soldier, the man underneath was often trampled upon. If Tsunade was trying to make her choose a side, she would leave no doubt that she was slowly coming to stand firmly behind Kakashi's line.

* * *

Fifteen days and three missions later found her trying to catch up with him at his apartment. Tsunade-shishou had mentioned something about an exchange of words along the lines of him hiding from sight lest she confine him to a numbered room for the length of his illness. Both knowing quite well his aversion to the hospital, she knew where he'd quarantined himself and made her way there. The Hokage was less likely to have him dragged in for observation if she thought he was at least _attempting_ to rest. She wondered how long it would last, this round of avoidance, if he still had Tsunade-shishou concerned. Still, though, she supposed he at least deserved to be checked up on. Tsunade-shishou wasn't one apt to worrying and especially not over Kakashi. And as she climbed the last of the stairs she couldn't help but think that a short house call wouldn't hurt. Just to make sure.

…Would it?

Her knock was gentle, not wanting to wake him if he was sleeping and wanting to give him a way out if that's what he wanted…although she really shouldn't enable him like that.

Nothing. She knocked again.

And when there was still no greeting or even shuffling of feet she frowned. She _knew_ he was in there, could feel it. So why wasn't he at least telling her to go away?

There was a sound – a very familiar sound – and her eyes widened. She couldn't wait, felt an urgent need to see him _right this instant_. After strong-arming the door – it was only a _little_ chakra, the door could be repaired easily enough – she let herself in and followed the faint chakra trail through the apartment. She came up short as soon as she entered his bedroom at the sight beyond.

Kakashi hurriedly threw up his mask, only able to throw a baleful and sickly look her way, too ill to rise in normal defense and face her…even after her forceful entry. He was bent over the receptacle in which he'd deposited the amount of food he'd tried to get down. He looked weakly from his coveted vessel to her and back again. He'd been losing weight from lack of appetite and had reached the point where he had to literally force himself to eat or he would soon enter shock and die. Or close to it. The hospital was as good as death. Attempts to gain sustenance had been largely unsuccessful thus far. Perhaps he should try a nutrient saturated broth again?

Her face fell. He looked _terrible_. It was obvious he was _not_ feeling good _at all_. She knew he didn't want to, but maybe he really should go to the hospital. She bet he was horribly dehydrated. But still, even with all that, he still had the presence of mind to cover his face. Her lips struggled not to frown. Instead, she motioned with her hand, unmoving from her initial arrival in his entryway, and said lightly, "Do you really need that now?"

He looked away from her gentle motions and countenance to some points in between several times, cradling his container as he sat on the floor. She was trying to be as unobtrusive and undemanding as possible, he could tell. And he appreciated it. He just didn't think much could be done about it. It was obvious he needed a little more help than his body alone was providing. Glancing once more out the corners of his eyes at her, he came back to rest on his bin of less than desirable contents and gave a pitifully weak and sheepish shake of the head, yielding to her unspoken offer.

A fleeting smile fled from her lips as she turned to close the door, Kakashi focusing intently on his receptacle. His mask remained up, however, and she was disappointed that it didn't immediately come down. In fact, they stood as they were in their respective slightly uncomfortable spaces for a few moments. Kakashi was the one to break it as the mask flew down and he bent over in another round of Stomach says Fuck You, Body.

He coughed twice in attempt to purge the lingering bile from his throat. He spit to remove the last from his mouth. Her heart went out to him. She struggled to say something meaningful but words escaped her.

No. She squeezed her eyes shut and fists closed, pulling herself together. She was here to help and right now she wasn't. Detouring around useless thoughts and habits, she approached within acceptable proximity, halting at the feel of something disturbingly wrong from him. His weakened state was most shocking and she could feel the immediate forming of an ulcer in her own stomach at the sudden stress that had sprung forth at seeing him in his truly appalling condition. How long had he been hiding it?

Well, she and Naruto had suspected – Sasuke pointing it out to her – that he'd been unwell for some time. She really meant to what extent had he been hiding this particular degree of severity? He'd never looked as he did now. She couldn't get her brows to _un_furrow, so great was her worry. She wondered how long he'd been fighting this. Had it just finally culminated into what was currently before her or were his symptoms indicative of something greater? She didn't know… But something was truly _wrong_. The first step to finding what that was was to treat what she could and go from there. She would have to take baby steps. And right now that consisted of questions.

"Have you gotten anything down?" A weak shake of his head. She nodded, having suspected as much. Alright, then, first thing's first: food. Taking a look around at the few ready-made containers, she got an idea of exactly what he had failed at keeping in him. Instant ramen? Sushi? She shook her head in bewilderment. What was he thinking? She felt slightly pressed for time for some reason, although she didn't know why. But she knew of a slightly quick fix.

Moving the last remaining steps closer, she knelt beside him and brought a hand up to reach for his face. She stopped short as he jerked back, ever on the defensive and eyeing her hand the whole time. She couldn't stop the small frown from springing forth at that, but she did acquiesce to his predisposition and brought chakra to her hand first before moving forward again. He visibly relaxed at the healing glow and allowed her to finish her motion. His survival instinct was so strong! Sometimes she didn't see how he and Gai had all those challenges if he was so afraid to let anyone close.

The look of _relief_ playing on his features after her short healing session impacted them both so profoundly that she could only hold him as he sighed and slumped, utter exhaustion winning out. She let it go on for almost ten minutes, feeling comfortable enough to leave him lay on the floor while she fixed some ramen. She strained the noodles, collecting the broth in a low-rising bowl and sat beside him, lending support as he slowly downed the liquid. This would help to settle his stomach and allow his body to rest so that his mind might as well.

When the tremendously trying task was completed, she set the bowl aside and allowed him to fully lay out beside her – despite her strong aversion otherwise – and pillow his head upon her lap. He was so weary that once he was positioned she gave in, but not completely. She let him unwind, even found herself combing through his matted hair, lightly stroking her fingers against his forehead and then his cheek. She remembered her mother doing this for her on occasion.

A final gentle pass of the backs of her fingers against his face and that was it. She brooked no argument as she stirred him and forced him to get in the bed. He would _not_ be sleeping on the floor. She stayed long enough to see his return to slumber before pulling the comforter up a little higher and taking the bowl from the floor to return it to the kitchen countertop. As she began to make a few simple ready-made 'meals' for throughout the week – she wanted to maximize his opportunity to rest – she thought _hard_; about what was; what happened; what _is_; and what she could see was coming. And as she finished washing the last of the used dishes, she formulated the wording necessary to illustrate to Hokage-sama that mandatory rest for him was _not_ an option.

It _would_ be done.

* * *


	12. Chapter 12

Such a simple – okay, who was she kidding; _profound_ – thing as showing his face to her opened up a realm of possibilities between them; the thing happening now between them directly resulting from it. The more she thought about it, the more she recognized that night for what it was: a _very_ deliberate and conscious attempt by Kakashi to open up to her. Much like he was doing now.

She'd carefully roped him into staying overnight through careful conversation - because she hadn't liked his level of hydration. She suspected he'd only been persuaded because of already feeling quite unwell. And she'd kind of promised that Tsunade would _not_ be sending him on _any_ kind of what-have-you missions for a guaranteed two weeks if he went in for the night - just the night so that she could get his fluid intake up to acceptable levels. She'd been surprised when he'd agreed, concern setting in as she started to worry about what might really be going on.

There were things on his body she never would have thought - marks, scars, and mars by techniques of obvious torture - as they lay sprawled across his mattress in a sort of skewed post-hospital follow-up visit. Although the position they were in illustrated a picture where each was extremely comfortable and familiar with the other, his wall was still very high and posture tight with caution. Still, it was progress – on an unthinkable level.

Her medic eyes scrutinized every imperfection, every twisting of once pure skin, automatically cataloguing causes and remedies - what could have been done; what should have been done - her even more knowledgeable fingers brushing against the more foreign (or sickeningly familiar) wounds to further cement diagnoses in her ever expanding mind. His breathing never faltered, eyes remaining affixed on some distant point as she brushed over her current fixation of long ago burned skin; a searing kunai pressed to flesh. She didn't linger on it long before continuing. It was not the only one.

It had surprised her – or should she say disillusioned – to discover that he was not invincible; not nearly so much as she had held him to be in her youth and as she still caught herself doing so today. She should not have found it so unlikely for him to have been captured. She'd always prided herself on her inherent sensibility, but why did he always so easily escape its bounds? It wasn't unreasonable to fathom him falling into enemy hands. He was a superb ninja, yes, but not indomitable. And there were serious, serious consequences to be had in such events. Such was especially true at the levels he'd been at. He would say they resulted from when he was 'young and stupid', although she didn't know how much of that she was supposed to believe. A young Kakashi making mistakes she could easily see. There were some pretty sharp learning curves in life - and few more serrated than in their world - but she had her doubts about his supposed former stupidity.

It hurt her to see such things on him. Why, she wasn't entirely sure, but she suspected it had to do with the idea of what lay behind them being there: that he'd been seriously hurt; that he'd done _things_ to get to that point; that he'd lived through them all to be with her here now on this bed, facing away from her and reclining in such a vulnerable state like some poor animal resigned to its fate, to let the invader have its way with it, accepting whatever would be.

It was things such as these that killed her.

He died a little every time as more of the perfect vision in her mind was chipped away, the true sculpture within being further revealed. She imagined someday soon all that would be left was a sad, lonely, broken human man in need of things she didn't know if she could give or he accept.

But…wait.

What was that?

What the _fuck_ was that?

"Kakashi."

His eyes shot to look at her from the side, his body unmoving. There was something he didn't like in her timbre. He felt fingers creep under his side to _that_ spot. Shit. _Shit_. He'd been on his back specifically so she _wouldn't_ see that!

"What is this?" It was a useless question as they both knew from that tone she knew exactly what it was. Her fingers ran back and forth over it even as both hands pushed at him to roll over more to fully reveal it. He could feel chakra fingers all over it as well. She was probing deeply.

"You put three seals on it."

He didn't move, didn't deny or confirm her discovery. Her stony features wavered, a watery smile bringing misery to the surface. "That's an awfully awkward spot for a curse seal, don't you think?" she said, referring to the slanted marks just on the side of his lower back.

He sighed quietly, still watching her from the side, unmoving. He'd been bitten - right on his side - as he'd pinned the demi-god's head in an elbow lock. It had been a very desperate move for Orochimaru, he knew. And the last one he ever made before Kakashi had severed his head. Of course the question remained if that was enough to kill the snake or not, having been thought dead once before. When he'd regained consciousness, he'd no longer been where he'd fallen beside the body.

"I think he meant to spite me to death. I don't think he intended for me to live." He said it so glibly, a tight smile pulling at his lips as if an injection of morbid humor would lessen the blow.

_Idiot_!

"And what would you do if three weren't enough?" she said into the awkward silence, changing the topic out of nowhere. She'd had to. She'd had to because all she could think of was 'not again, not again'. She couldn't bear lose someone else to that again!

If the unthinkable happened…

"Kill myself."

She clenched her eyes shut. She knew he would.

There was a quick inhalation of air that he thought suspiciously close to a sniffle.

"You have got to be the most stupid genius I've ever met," she said in a tight whisper as she fought her emotions, eventually losing and collapsing onto his front as her arms wound tightly around him. The memory of losing any of her loved ones was too fresh.

He stiffened, every muscle contracting. It was quite the feeling with her atop him and the muscles of his abdomen pulled taut, the fabric of her clothes and heat of her body foreign in their proximity. But then there was a warm splash against his chest and a tightening of arms, a soft face desperately rubbing into his skin and his tension left him. His large hand atop her head only caused the actions to increase. He breathed deeply before letting his arm rest lightly across her waist as more tears fell against him. He would let her purge it from her system and turned back to gaze out the window.

He was…touched…that she would cry for him.

* * *

"Please," she said, slight exasperation already coloring her voice as her hands worked to correct his posture. Her left gave a hard poke to his shoulder until he turned towards her, the right turning his chin so that his gaze lined up with hers. "Look at me. The faster we get this done, the sooner you can go. Right?" she bargained raising her brows in question.

He sighed, glancing off to the side and slumping in his crossed-legged position. She wanted to try again and he didn't know why he _shouldn't_ dissuade her attempt, but he did know that he really didn't want to go through with it. Not today. He just didn't want to see her put so much effort into something he knew would prove to be a fruitless endeavor. He didn't know _how_ she'd conned him into it.

"C'mon, Kakashi. One more try. And if not this time, then the next." Damn it. She wasn't going to let this drop. Not today. Figures. The one day he _really_, _really_ didn't want do this. She pleaded with large eyes meant only for his benefit. "You can't deny it would be a _huge_ advantage on the battlefield." She batted them a few times. "Not to mention the convenience it would give you in everyday life." She even had the audacity to pout her lips at the end there.

He heaved a sigh not entirely for show and looked away, contemplating every thing that was being presented. Of course he saw the advantage…_if_ it could be done. But he had a hard time rising to her level of belief that it could be. His head shook slightly in thought. He didn't think it could…

But what did he have to lose? He was just sitting helplessly crossed-legged before her with nothing better to do at the moment. Might as well, right? He met her much too hopeful gaze and nodded curtly, letting his eye fall half-lidded. "Once."

If it would help her eliminate this urge to fix him… The light that exploded in her eyes at that statement made his chest and shoulders fall in sorrow. She would be so disappointed.

"Alright, Kakashi," she said, scooting closer and patting the ground directly in front of her. "Come here." He obliged, closing the inches between them until the cross of his shins bumped her knees. He pulled the headband from his eye and over his head as she readjusted to his proximity. Setting it to the side, he sat up a little straighter as her palm flattened against his cheek, eye widening in moderate alarm. He didn't know if he would ever get used to non-violent physical contact.

Guess this was it, eh?

He took a deep breath, to steady himself more from the intimate contact than any impending failure – he'd already reconciled with that. Too close. Simply too close. It was an effort to control his breathing…and it shouldn't have been.

She drew breath to speak, the intake of air rushing in and almost overpowering his sensitive hearing. He squeezed his eyes shut – hard – briefly. He was far too sensitive at the moment. Such a gentle motion never should have tripped his senses so severely. Oh. Well… That explained it. Her chakra was already flowing through him. Once he figured that out, everything else made sense. Mostly, anyway… he thought. He questioned the breathing item, though.

"I'm going to try to pick up where we left off last time," she spoke softly between them, eyes having fallen closed sometime before. He'd missed that event. She exhaled. He could feel it tickling the hairs on his lip even under the mask. Hm. Still sensitive.

And pick up she did. He could feel the chakra flow in force through him, sweeping through his pathways and moving swiftly through his neural network, gaining a boost as it cleared the Gate to collect in a deep pool behind his eye. From there he could feel it sway back and forth in waves until a swell seemed to overcome the dam and rush into the eye itself. It burned like fire before it was suddenly dowsed.

He startled at a tap against the corner of his eye. "Open it."

He inhaled, preparing himself to face the disappointment written across her features. He could imagine his own shock when upon opening it her face was in perfect focus, color uniform throughout both eyes. His breath escaped him, released in an unconscious and forceful exhalation as his lungs lost control. He could see. He could _see_! His eyes flicked around her features, alight with mirthful amusement and _joy_, and he couldn't help the incredulous and amazed grin that broke out on his face. His smile widened as she bounced in short laughter at feeling his emotion taking shape under her palm.

What had she done? What had she _done_! It was fantastic! Her face; the grass, the leaves on the damned trees! Everything looked so…_normal_! The elated sound that broke past his lips was unexpected but he didn't think twice about it.

He was so…amazed; happy, even. He couldn't remember the last time he'd smiled so widely. And he couldn't stop himself from hugging her; really hugging her. And he was _glad_ he did. He hadn't felt this thankful in many years. Many, many years. It took a lot of second-guessing before he went through with the impulse. Leave it to him to over analyze such a simple thing. He hadn't felt that close to anyone since the Fourth. It…was a bizarre feeling.

But as soon as her guiding hand lost contact, so did his average vision. The smile faltered a little, but it was okay. It _meant_ something: this was _possible_. With a little more work, he could be _normal_ again. Okay, okay, as normal as he had ever passed for.

He pulled away to arms length and looked her in the eye, his smile subdued. "Thank you, Sakura. Thank you."

And it had been many years since he'd last said those words and _meant_ them as vehemently as he did then.

* * *

Pakkun was worried. Very, _very_ worried. In fact, he was so overwhelmed with concern that he was very seriously considering abandoning any facade of counsel with his master outright to seek help in the form of his most recent pact-member… or pack member. Same thing, really. She was family, now.

…and decidedly more sane, he thought.

He threw another worried look to Kakashi, his wrinkled mug becoming slightly more pronounced as his frown deepened. The idiot would not stop _smiling_. Something was definitely wrong. He couldn't contain it any longer.

"Kakashi," he growled out, "what is _wrong_ with you?" He continued to throw glances between the ground and the stranger-by-the-day man beside him, hoping to catch _some_ insight as to why he was behaving in such a bewildering manner.

Kakashi's eye remained steadfastly creased in what he knew to be a smile. Pakkun only sighed, no longer expecting an answer.

"What?" Kakashi finally answered, word choice feigning ignorance but tone indicating that he knew very well to what the pug was referring.

"You're _smiling_," he ground out, indicating that in and of itself was cause enough for worry.

"Yes. I am." Kakashi was positively beaming, completely uncaring of how disturbing his behavior was right now. "I'm _happy_."

Pakkun paused, forepaw still in the air, the most unusual admission halting him mid step for a moment. Whaaaaaat? Kakashi was _never_ _happy_. Less sad, less angsty, but never 'happy'. Not really. This admission made him think.

Was he telling the truth? What had happened? Was this really Kakashi before him?

He leaned a little closer and sniffed once. Again. Yes, it certainly smelled like him. A third time.

Had they finally mated?

He detected an absence of another's scent on him. Although, he supposed a thorough shower would remove most of that from his person – and he knew Kakashi of all people would know precisely how to rid himself of unwanted scents. He couldn't stand it any longer! "Tell me already, Kakashi. Not knowing is killing me."

"That's funny," he spared in an aside, "you look plenty alive to me."

Really… He was far too smug, Pakkun thought. Well, if he was gonna play like _that_…

"Hmm," he leaned into the barb, "considering what usually makes you 'happy', I'd say you had a good run in with some eager 'fan'. Or porn." Sparing a side glance, he felt no need to hold back. "Knowing you, the latter."

Although the look he shot to the dog was _not_ amused, it did nothing to foul his mood. "I could _see_, today, Pakkun." Of course the dog only fixed him with a dumb look. He knew. "_Really_ _see_. Like someone _normal_…" He sobered for a moment, hating himself for the traitorous feeling of relief. He didn't deserve it. Ever. He owed him _everything_, after all. "…before the Sharingan…"

Pakkun's wide eyes were easily felt, but he didn't turn to meet them. He was trying to save himself from drowning in the sudden onset of guilt. But he heard Pakkun's gentle utterance of his name.

Before anything else could be said, he threw another smile at Pakkun. They both knew how fake it was. "Maybe this won't be such a bad thing after all." And Kakashi shoved his hands further into his pockets and continued onward.

Pakkun couldn't bring himself to follow.

* * *

He quickly looked both ways before crossing the street amongst the midmorning market traffic. Dodging distracted shoppers, he kept his eyes on the goal as he padded beneath feet unawares. There was a small gate granting access to the property he was currently trying to infiltrate: closed, of course. He would expect nothing less. His life never had been _easy_. Nevertheless, he poked his head through and flattened himself out to let his shoulders slip through. It took some twisting and a sophisticated rhythm to wiggle his hips through.

"Look, mama!" a boy shouted, pulling on his mother's hand and pointing. "That dog just broke into somebody's house!"

"What?" she said, half laughing and looking around. "Don't be silly," she said after seeing nothing of the sort. "Besides, animals have a way of finding their way home again. Maybe he lives there." Her son did not look convinced at first, but began to doubt as he thought on it. "Now, then. Let's get going. We've lots of shopping to do yet."

Pakkun grimaced at the boy's shouts.

That had taken a bit longer than it should have to get through such a small space… And he should not have been seen. He should have been fast enough to have gone unnoticed. Hm. He may have to cut back on some of those treats Sakura gave him. He sighed as he crossed the tiny yard. That saddened him greatly.

But never mind that…for now. There was another matter to attend to. He hopped his way up to her residence, pausing outside on the small ledge to ascertain its occupancy. He gently pawed the window once, leaning forward to peer between the curtains. He pawed again. He could see a shadow. He decided to give her a few moments.

The shadow crossed the room again, oblivious to his attempts. He barked and was satisfied to see her pause and look at him, unseeing as the curtain obscured him. Watching as curiosity took hold of her he stood, tail wagging slightly. Its fervor increased as she drew the curtains and made eye contact with him and he smiled back at her.

Her eyes followed her hands as they unlatched the window and pushed it up. "Pakkun!" she said sticking her head out and looking around slightly. "Where's your master?" She moved aside for him to come in.

He grunted as he landed upon her floor. Shaking to settle his fur back in place, he responded grumpily, "Who knows?"

She only lifted an eyebrow at that response. Sensing her stare, he looked up. She met it, eyeing the dark hooded eyes underneath his rolls. They distinctly said, 'What?' She sighed. He could be just as bad as Kakashi.

"Never mind, I guess." She turned around to continue doing what ever he'd interrupted and he took a moment before following her. "It's just unusual to see you without him."

He let his butt fall to the floor and watched as she finished folding a shirt and placed it in the basket. He almost felt like he was interrupting something.

Sensing his presence near where he'd entered the room, she shot him a glance. He was completely transfixed with her chore. "Is something wrong?" she spoke aside to him, focused once again on her task. "Did you two have an argument again?"

She was slightly pleased to see that shake him out of his trance and he turned to look to the side. "No. Not really," she heard him mumble.

Placing another piece of clothing upon the pile, she started in on another, eyebrow raised at that statement. "Oh?" Didn't sound like it from _that_ account. She heard his weary sigh.

"He…said something today that I've never heard him say before." He spared a moment to look at her - rather intently, she thought. "I just came to ascertain whether that was true or not."

Okay, _now_ he had her attention. She placed her hand at her hip and turned to face him. What was this all about? Oh, now wasn't that intriguing? Pakkun was breaking eye contact with her.

"I… He said…he could '_see_' like he used to." Here he tentatively met her eyes before looking away again. "Before…all that." He was looking at her wall again. His line of sight fell to the floor, his voice with it. "He'd said he was…_happy_."

She beamed. "Did he?"

Pakkun's eyes shot to hers. "Yes."

"Good." She was smiling so brightly.

He stood and took a few steps toward her, irrational emotion swelling within his tiny fluttering chest. She didn't get it. "You don't understand!" he said fiercely, lowly. "He's never _been_ happy. Not even as a child."

She sobered a little but met his stare head on. "Then let him have this moment." Pakkun didn't move but she was aware of his fading tension.

He froze, unable to think clearly. What did that _mean_? Should he do as she said? Should he let it be? Surely Kakashi knew what he was doing, but what of it? What would happen? How would this affect Kakashi? How _wouldn't_ it affect him? Would this change truly be for the better? Would…this hurt both of them?

He didn't want anything to happen to Kakashi or Sakura. He didn't. He liked them both so very much… But what did he know about human affairs? Maybe he should do as she said…

After a moment, he jerkily turned away from her - his uncertainty manifesting itself physically - and began to head for the window. His thoughts were still tripping over themselves. He paused, relenting to the logic that human business is best left to humans.

"Very well, then. I leave him in your care."


End file.
